What are the tears?

1. Once, a neodymium boy ran to ω ω ω ω ω ω ω ω ω ω ω 93' s lover. On the way home, the woman cried and the man asked her why. The woman said sadly: you don't love me, otherwise you wouldn't pull so much. During the Spring Festival, two poor beggars had nothing to eat all day. In the middle of the night, they were cold and hungry. The older one said, "Brother, this is no good. I'm sure I can't. Let's go out and find something to eat. " Two people came to the door of a restaurant, just as a group of people came out drunk, one man vomited in the street with a "wow" and two beggars scrambled to eat. Just after eating, the little one said to another person, "Big Brother, you just ate a fly." The older one spat out what he had just eaten with a "wow". Just as he spat, his brother quickly opened his mouth and drank it all at once, without spoiling it. The older man asked, "What are you doing?" The man replied, "Brother, I have a bad stomach. I need something hot." 4. A famous stingy old landlord, in order to change his impression of being "stingy" in the eyes of the people, one day, he put a big vat at his door and called the whole village together, saying, "Whoever spits in this vat today, I will give it to him 10 yuan." Who would believe it? What bad idea does the old landlord have? Everyone stood there motionless. At this moment, a stranger passed by, thinking that there was nothing to lose anyway, and poof, he spat a big mouthful of sticky phlegm into the jar. Without saying anything, the old landlord immediately gave it to 10 yuan. The stranger left happily. The villagers woke up like a dream and spat in the jar. Soon the Kung Fu jar was full and everyone got their due reward. The old landlord said, "Don't go. If anyone takes a sip, I will give him 100 yuan. " Just as the villagers were hesitating, a young man flew over, slurped at the jar, drank until there was only one ass left, and then slowly got up and looked at everyone. Everyone was anxious and asked, "Why don't you leave us more?" The young man replied, "I think! But I have never bitten. " There used to be three children taking a shit in a game. The first one drew an S-shape, the second one drew an L-shape, but the third one drew an equilateral triangle. The other two admired him and asked him how to play. He added a finger and said it was good. 6. Play mahjong with several colleagues after work, two men and two women. Later, when playing cards, there was a young man. When playing cards, there will always be many people watching. This is because a woman found that the man was missing a card and said he was a "xianggong". Later, another man said, "Don't introduce me, we all know that he is your" xianggong "! 7. The prostitute said: Come to meet thousands of miles. Is 200 yuan expensive? The client said: Qian Shan always loves thousands of waters. How about fifty dollars? Prostitute said: how many times is the spring breeze, at least 130. The customer said: There are plenty of fish in the sea, and I won't do it if I am over 80! 8. There is a pear on the plate and something like mud on the table. Xiaoli pinched the pear with mud, looked at the pear, and pinched the pear with her hands, comparing the real pear with the fake pear. 9. In order to earn money, study is not a disease, and exams are half dead. When the gold medal was nominated, her parents were scared and sick. Tuition is like a mountain, which makes them bend down and not study. They are holding the notice in their hands and staring at each other. Their parents were in tears and the students sighed. Children bear the responsibility of turning over and not farming. Don't blame their parents for being poor and mixing people back to worship their ancestors! 10. A mother bought a parrot for her son and went home by bus. On the bus, the lovely son asked his mother, "Is this parrot male or female?" "female." The mother replied, how do you know? "The son asked again. There was silence on the bus, and all the passengers wanted to hear what the mother said. She answered unhurriedly, "Don't you see that this parrot has lipstick on its mouth? "