Funny and humorous netizen replies

1. Poster: Aren’t you women hot when you wear bras in the summer?

Reply: If we don’t wear them, you will be hot...

2. Posted by: I beat up my dog! He didn’t tell me about the earthquake. He usually barked so happily, but during the earthquake just now he was sleeping in his kennel as if nothing happened!

Reply: Alas, it wasn’t after all. Biological...

3. Host: My wife has given birth to a baby girl. She is very cute. Please help me give my daughter a powerful name. My surname is Cheng.

Reply: A chicken misses Han.

4. Poster: Give me a woman, and I will create a nation!

Reply: Well, give you a sow, and the price of meat will drop next year!< /p>

5. Poster: Please describe China’s National Seismological Observatory in one sentence.

Reply: Hindsight is better than hindsight!

6. Poster: Talking to the idiots at work every day makes me feel that my future is very slim...

Reply: Be happy~ Because playing the piano to a cow is not scary. What is scary is a group of cows playing the piano to you every day!

7. Poster: The city manager has added new weapons to catch stray dogs!

< p> Violent reply: They are born from the same roots, so why should we try to fry them in such a hurry?

8. Poster: Why do more and more people not want children?

Rape reply: Senior officials sent from Beijing have said that we should start with babies.

9. Postmaster: There is a student who ranks last in grades every year and often fights with others. According to the leader’s request, the teacher wants to give the students a nicer final comment. How should I write it?

Strong reply: This student has stable grades and strong practical ability.

10. Poster: From the Hainan mineral water drinking incident, we can see that China’s food safety is worrying. Mineral water can also kill people? Isn’t there a QS mark?

Violent rape Reply: Let me ask you weakly, does QS mean to die?

11. Host: Do you want Li Yuchun or Zhang Ziyi as a man?

Violent reply: A rooster, a pheasant , choose neither

12. Poster: Which one is more cost-effective: raising a dog or raising a man?

Violent reply: Auntie, even if you can treat a man like a dog, you dare Can you treat a dog like a man?

13. Host: Li Yuchun and Sister Furong fell into the water at the same time. You have a brick in your hand, who do you hit?

Rape reply: Who Save whoever.

14. Forum owner: I have one million and want to buy a car. Please give me some advice.

Forum reply: You can sell 30 QQs and form a fleet to drive them, one in S type and the other in B type.

15. Forum owner: Wang Xiaoya and Chen Zhangliang are getting married. Please comment in four words.

Forum reply: You have become a good person!

16. Forum owner: Last night when we were walking the dog, our big Tibetan mastiff and a bald wild dog bit each other by the woods. Fuck! I didn’t expect the Tibetan Mastiff to be defeated by a stupid dog!!!

Forum Sofa: ****, before I went bald, they all called me a lion!

17. Forum Posted by: If I have 100 million yuan, I can get a loan to buy a house in Tomson Yipin!

Forum reply: Yes, but you still have to borrow money to pay property fees first~

18. Forum moderator: He vowed today that I am a part of his life, and I am a part of his body. If he didn’t have me, he wouldn’t be able to survive~

Forum sofa: Mine. My ex-boyfriend said the same thing, but later I found out that I was his appendix, appendix, ears, six fingers and other dispensable things!

19. Forum owner: I am so rich. I have enough money, what kind of car should I buy for my nanny?

Forum reply: It depends on the relationship between her and your husband~

20. Forum owner: Damn it The barber shop cut my head badly! Everyone came up with some tricks, asking for the more damage the better and the less noise the better, because I was going there alone.

Forum basement: In the middle of the night, the moon was dark and the wind was high, quietly and gently, a man hung himself in front of the barber shop...

21. Forum host: Did you ever do that when you were a child? When you grow up, what kind of scene do you imagine will make you stand out in front of everyone?

Forum bench: pick up a load of dung and go to the street, and throw it at anyone who doesn't like it!

p>

22. Forum owner: Why do the police sound the siren when they arrest bad guys? Aren’t they afraid that the bad guys will run away if they hear it from a distance?

Forum sofa: Superior units usually notify them in advance before coming to inspect. From a subordinate unit~

23. Forum owner: Why does the child born have the same surname as his father?

Forum sofa: Because the money spit out from the cash machine belongs to the person who inserted the card.

24. Forum owner: There is no use for being handsome - in the end, he is not eaten by pawns!

Forum reply: Being handsome is accompanied by soldiers, cannoned, and ridden by horses. He has a car to ride in and a secret love... Why can't he be handsome?!!