The uncle in the village died, and his married daughter asked the villagers for help, but no one helped. what do you think?

It does happen occasionally in rural areas. The reason why this happens is mostly due to the personal reasons of the family involved.

For example, this happened in my uncle's village a few years ago. When an old man was alive, no matter who held a wedding in the village, he didn't help or follow the crowd. Such a family, in our local countryside, has a word to describe it as: "It has passed the door of death."

After the old man died, his son, who was far away from home, came back to deal with the aftermath. As a result, neither the neighbors nor the villagers came to help. In desperation, he had to kowtow from door to door for help. At least a few people can't help but come and help. But on the day of the funeral, anyway, 16 people were not enough to fight. People who can wrangle in the village either shirk something at home or get behind their backs. There is really no way. The old man's son can only pay people from neighboring villages to fight.

Before the funeral was finished, what happened in their family spread in Shiliba village and became the talk and laughing stock of the villagers after dinner.

Thank you for your invitation:

The subject asked, my uncle died, and my married daughter asked the villagers for help, but no one helped. what do you think?

I think this is caused by many reasons. First, in the current environment, most young people in rural areas go to other places to work. Only a few people who can't travel far will find some work nearby, and their yard can earn 200 yuan a day. This embarrassing situation is caused by interests, or it is not good for the work unit to ask for leave.

Second, some people go up and down and pay attention to returns. There is no son in his family, and his daughter married in a foreign country, which delayed her work to help him. Once she has something to do, she doesn't need him, so she doesn't lose money in this business.

Third, the deceased offended some villains or some influential people in the village for various reasons before his death. These people take the opportunity to get in the way, just to embarrass them.

The problem of the subject is relatively rare in general. Rural people are simple and homesick, and they often say that "the dead are the biggest." As long as the dutiful son and daughter are invited, even if it is a big holiday, they should all die. Most people will put aside their differences and take the initiative to give the dead a ride!

First of all, it can be judged that this uncle has no son. Isn't it strange that a married daughter in mourning turned a deaf ear to her neighbor's help?

Under normal circumstances, white things in rural areas are uninvited. How can a host ask for this kind of situation? In our local area, there is a saying called funeral three cannons. After three gunshots, neighbors, relatives and villagers rushed to the home of the deceased, obeyed the orders of the general manager, and completed all matters related to the funeral.

Even if the deceased offended many people before his death, the deceased was the biggest. As a living person, you won't haggle with a dead person. Therefore, the villagers should help anyway. If you refuse to help, it will be a bit unkind and petty. If the invited people refuse to help, then there will be something wrong with the village style here, and it will really become "the voice of chickens and dogs hears each other, but the boss and the ambassador don't talk to each other."

Chairman Mao once said: People in the village died, so we should hold a memorial service to express our grief in this way. So whenever there is something white in the village, you must help, and you can't watch the fire from the other side and see jokes.

Specific analysis of the specific situation.

Some time ago, a relative of my hometown passed away, and I took the lead in organizing the funeral. At first, several people came to the village one after another, still some old, weak and sick, and one of them was shaking even when walking. The team leader told me that all the people in the village had come, and all the young and middle-aged people had gone to work in other places. Those who stay at home are left-behind children and women, as well as these empty nesters. I looked at the deserted fields, overgrown country roads and deserted dilapidated houses, and I knew that the leader was telling the truth. If I hadn't called my brothers from other places, they would have gone back to China to organize the funeral. I don't think even people who carry coffins up the mountain can get together. This is the real rural phenomenon, especially in those remote and poor mountain villages, where the land is vast and the population is sparse, and it is common for people to go to the building.

An old man died in the village. His married daughter asked for help. There may be the following situations.

First, the son of the deceased old man didn't come forward, but was invited by his married daughter, and people didn't buy it at all. There are some deep-rooted customs in the countryside, that is, when the old man dies, the dutiful son and grandson have to come forward to ask for help, and face is given to them. The filial son and grandson will also help the next time the family has a big cold. In our hometown, this kind of mutual support and help is called "job hopping". If a married daughter comes forward and asks for help, why do people refuse? In the concept of rural people, a married woman is like spilled water, and her daughter's words have no weight, and the people invited are not respected. Besides, what happened at the home of these invited people? Will the daughter come to help? Therefore, it is inappropriate for a daughter to ask for help, and the effect is certainly not obvious.

Second, the old man who died had no son, only a married daughter. Because of the daughter's marriage, there is a wedding in the village, and the daughters have nothing to do with them, and there is no human relationship. When my father died and asked them for help at the last minute, people would certainly be unwilling to accept it. In this respect, my parents have done a good job. Our family has been away from home for nearly forty years, and there has been no room under the eaves, but my parents have been keeping in touch with their neighbors. If anyone has something to do, just ask me to join in the fun. Even if people can't go, human feelings should be in place, including those lonely old people who died. They will let me go back to my hometown to help with the funeral. It can be said that my parents have accumulated deep network resources for our brothers and sisters in my hometown.

Third, the old people who died have their own reasons. How do you say this? That is, when the old man was alive, he was eccentric and inexperienced, or he had a dispute with his neighbors because of a few inches of land and a meter of foundation, and his relationship was not so harmonious. Perhaps the old man used to be very strong, belonging to the kind of person who made much ado about nothing and pestered people, and offended everyone in the village. Although the old man died and his daughter came forward for help, no one was willing to take care of his funeral.

Whatever the reason, this reminds us. Be kind to others and don't haggle over every ounce. When a person comes to this world naked, he will return to his hometown and become a cool breeze and bright moon. Fighting for wealth is also a lifetime, and it is also a lifetime. I can't take away a cloud. Networking is a kind of resource, you can't just take it or not. Human feelings are saws. Pull them over. Only by understanding these truths can we be more tolerant and understanding, and less embarrassed and accused.

In this kind of thing in the countryside, if the deceased has a son, it is the son who goes to kneel for help, not the married daughter. If the deceased had no son, his nephew would go. Besides, was there anything wrong with the deceased when he was alive?

The victim had no son? Do you have a nephew (nephew or nephew)? If a son or nephew's daughter asks for help, no wonder no one helps. If there are no sons and nephews, the daughter goes to invite people, but no one goes, which shows that the deceased was not likable when he was alive, and he was an unworthy person.

90% is because of bad popularity! There are more than 70 families in my village. My sister is married to a town, and all three of us work in the city. They have been away from home for more than 20 years, and their parents have been living with us. The old house has rotted away. My parents died a few years later, buried in the ground, and were busy at home for a few days, all of which walked out of the funeral smoothly.

When my parents were alive, we always attended weddings and funerals in the village. When we are free, we will go back and sit in person! Every time I go back to the village, I walk around the village and never put on airs! Take some snacks to the village where children play and adults gather!

…………

Now that my parents are gone, I go back to the village with gifts. When I returned to the city, the trunk was still full of feelings. The host takes some earth eggs, some winter bamboo shoots in the west, and the neighbors send some rare earth things!

Rural people, I don't think much about how much money you give him. Talking about their topic is enough. I didn't want to pay for the hardening of the roads in the village, so I bought a batch of trees for them to plant privately on the roadside. The quantity is not much, so I donated some things that the village wanted!

My salary is not high either, only 7 thousand a month before retirement.

People, pay attention to helping each other, help each other on foot, if they have not helped the people in the village at ordinary times. Walking around, there is no human relationship between neighbors at ordinary times, and there is no gift for them during the Chinese New Year holiday.

If this happens, it is best not to ask others for face and self-esteem. Why?

Because begging others, others will think of watching jokes, because their usual relationship has not been handled well. No matter how good the relationship is, it's best to use money to solve it, otherwise you will owe others a big favor, owe them a favor, and feel depressed and unhappy.

There is a saying in the countryside that "relatives are only kind to relatives, and the fence next door only looks down." The fence is equivalent to the present courtyard wall. After it falls, others will have a broader vision and a better mood. There are few simple people in the countryside now, which is not bad for you. I don't know what caused it.

If you can't help others at ordinary times, and such a thing really happens, there is still the best way to do it with the least money.

This is the case with a friend I know. He works in other places and seldom goes back to his hometown. His 80-year-old father didn't want to live with him and died in his hometown. Many people want to see jokes, and others are waiting for him to kneel down and ask someone to bury his father.

Unexpectedly, he left the old man in the old house for a few days and set off firecrackers when it was time. Please dig the machine for two hours to finish the burial. It's that simple.

I think it is the greatest filial piety for parents and relatives to treat their parents well in life and spend less money on funerals, because they also hope that the living offspring will have a better life!

Whether it's a married daughter or a son at home, it's normal for an old man at home to die without anyone coming, so there's no need to struggle. Don't measure today's society with the eyes of the past. Weddings and funerals are very simple in rural areas at present, and there is no way to compare them with the past. In the past, people from half the village came to help with big things and small feelings, because every family would have something to do and it was very human.

It's different now. Everyone is trying to make money. There are no idle people in the village, locking the door and closing the door, working near the older ones and working in the younger ones. It makes people feel indifferent and the human touch is much lighter. Generally speaking, when the old man died, he was a part of Pima Dai Xiao, and there were not many people. Now that the funeral is simplified, these things can be passed as long as he spends more money. Especially during the epidemic, it is simpler.

In the future, fewer and fewer people will help in the village, which is also the inevitable law of social development. Therefore, when the old man is alive, it is better to be filial than anything else, and it is much better than screwing around for face after death.