Are there any jokes about Journey to the West?

Dear Kongkong:

I am Xiao Bai, who hit me three times last time. I miss you very much, but why have you been ignoring me? I understand that you only care about your master and protect him, but recently your second brother's meat is more valuable than yours, so you have to take care of two people. You are getting thinner and thinner and less like a monkey. You should pay attention to your health.

By the way, do you know who I am? What about white? It's only half right. White is my later identity. Actually, I'm your neighbor. It turns out that I am the little girl who always picks peaches for you when you are crushed under Wuzhishan. When I was young, you called me LOLI, remember? I like you very much since I was a child. Your melancholy eyes, sparse beard, especially your long hair, and your noble sentiment of eating peaches without spitting peach stones deeply touched me.

At that time, everything was wonderful. I didn't expect the years to be ruthless. Later, I became an old woman. I was ashamed to see you, so I became a demon. Although he became a monk halfway, he learned quickly. Now I can disguise my age and different roles, and I am not afraid of fairies. But after all, becoming a monk halfway, learning harder than others. Do you understand these?

Empty, what I do is for you. It took me two years to repeat the college entrance examination before I was admitted to the devil major. I was 82 years old when I was admitted to the university. The media also reported that I was the biggest college student, but the news was gone. Later, I saw that you were still at the foot of the mountain, so I read another blog, which took more than 385 years. Our tutor is really good. Let's talk about it later. I am much younger now than when I first came here. I look like 20 years old!

Empty, you know, I've had a hard time these years. In order not to let you say that I am old, I spent all my money on cosmetics (which is why I haven't been online for a long time). There are many cosmetics in the shopping mall now, such as Oprah, biotherm and H2O. By the way, I'll give you two bottles of men's products later. Nothing, just a little. Pretty petty. People are like this now!

Empty, I know you went out that day to accompany Mr. Tang to India for a holiday. You just got out of prison and found such a good job. I admire you so much. In order to meet you, I ran to the road and waited for you without my diploma. When I had no money, I went to live in a cave. There is no air conditioning in summer and no heating in winter, which is really unbearable.

Empty, after so many years, I didn't know what type you like, so I pretended to be a village girl to get close to you, but I thought you didn't like this type, so I shot it down with a stick. You are not young, so I thought you might like the older one. Just pretend to be an old girl in her 60 s, but I didn't expect you still don't like it. It's hard for me. If you don't like young and old, then you must like men. It takes a lot of effort to pretend to be a man. I hope I can succeed this time, but I didn't know you were still cold.

After careful analysis, I suspect that your master is present, and you are just embarrassed. In fact, what your master said may not be right. He said, "Man is born from his mother, and the devil is born from his mother." This sentence is wrong, at least my mother is a real human being. In addition, he sang "Only You" to show off his vibrato, and his sisters said it was disgusting. Don't learn.

Dear Kong, if you feel anything, I will wait for you in the coffee shop near Baigudong in three days. I was the one who was drinking soybean milk when you came in!

Love, Xiao Bai