50 jokes

1, the fish said, "I always open my eyes and leave you." The water said, "I have been flowing tirelessly all day and want to hug you." The pot said, "I'm so stubborn when I'm fucking ripe."

2. Once upon a time, there was a poor man whose son got married and his mother had no money to buy underwear for him, so she made him a pair of underwear with a rice bag. On my wedding night, when I took off my pants, my wife fainted on the spot. On the front of the underwear, it says: net weight is 25 kg, made in Thailand. ...

Several monkeys peeked at a man who was taking a bath. Suddenly a monkey fell from the tree laughing and asked him why he was laughing. It said: it's strange that human beings have such a short tail that they have a face in front! Laugh me to death! !

The elephant laughed at the camel and said, "Why do your breasts grow on your back?" "Hum!" The camel said, "I never talk to people with dicks on their faces!" " "The snake laughed, and the elephant said," The face is on the penis! What are you laughing at? ? "

Chickens and cows complain, "It's unfair that humans let us lay more eggs while they plan their own families." The cow said, "What's your little grievance? So many people eat my milk, but no one calls me mom. "

6. A man goes to the toilet. The next door suddenly said, How have you been recently? The answer is not rude: not bad. The next door said: What are you busy with? M: On business. Next door: I'll hang up first. There's a psycho here. As soon as he spoke, he tried to answer.

7. Love is like shit. Once the water is washed, it will never come back. Love is like shit, it can't stop when it comes. Love is like shit, it's the same every time, but it's different. Love is like shit, sometimes it's just a fart if you work hard for a long time.

8. The bird flew out of the forest wearing a bulletproof vest and soon came back with a gunshot wound. The squirrel saw it and asked, how did you get shot in a bulletproof vest? The bird said, damn it, I will never undress again!

9. Sleep to death: sleep with a beautiful woman who is excited to death; Sleep with your lover; Sleeping with ugly women is boring to death; Sleeping with dancers is expensive to death; Sleeping with a fierce woman is exhausting; Sleeping with a virgin is stupid to death; Sleep with your wife all night and play dead.

10, I've always wanted to know what it's like to be loved ... and many people got hurt!

1 1. Once I looked up at the starry sky with my friends, and then we burst into tears. He was lovelorn and I sprained my neck.

12, he's just a pot of water, pour it into your rice pile. After several years, the clear water turns into mellow wine, and you become a pile of abandoned rotten rice, which can be used to feed pigs.

13, the beauty of learning is that people are confused; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets; The beauty of a man lies in lying.

14, Panda Man wants QJ Panda Girl, and Panda Girl fights hard and fights to the death. After the failure, Panda Man said angrily, "We are all going extinct!" "

15 one day, the cow gave the donkey a difficult problem and asked which of the two bugs under the word "stupid" was male and which was female. The donkey racked his brains, but he still couldn't answer. Cow scolds: What a donkey, male left and female right!

16, the tortoise is ill, and the snail is asked to buy medicine. Three hours later, before the snail came back, the tortoise cursed, "If you don't come back, I'll die."