Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Self-introduction of tour guide humor
Self-introduction of tour guide humor
Introduction humor funny self-introduction opening remarks 1? The mountains are good, the water is good, and it is no trouble to get on the bus. ? Good Morning, everyone! What is my name? , is it? Tour guides of travel agencies have a saying in society.
Not only do you agree or disagree, teachers heal people's souls, doctors heal people's bodies, and police cure social diseases. It seems that social education really depends on all of you here. I wanted to be a teacher since I was a child, but I didn't get into normal school. Fortunately, my sister was admitted to the normal school.
At least there is a teacher in our family, so when I mention her, my mother always has a proud smile on her face.
Hehe, but our tour guides are also most afraid of taking teachers' groups, because the tour guides are always fooling around with their mouths and bragging wildly, but the teachers' cultural level is relatively high, which poses a great challenge to the tour guides' explanation. Therefore, general tour guides are afraid to teach others to swim, and the pressure on tour guides to take the power of teachers will become greater, so the trip will be small and medium? I hope the teachers will forgive me if I don't speak well or make a little mistake. I think the teacher group is very happy and can fundamentally improve their knowledge. Hehe, every time I take a teacher group, I gain a lot, and I am very interested in learning from you.
Today's route is arranged like this, ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~. ?
The humorous introduction of the tour guide 2 Dear group members, let's interact. Please answer a question. How many people are there in the world?
(Team members have answered)
Actually, I don't know. Suppose it exceeds 6 billion.
One more question for you: How many people are there in China?
(Group members answer again)
Actually, I still can't say clearly. Suppose it is1300 million.
There is a question that I don't need to ask you, and I know it, that is, how many people are there in our group? Tell everyone that there are (80) people in our group.
What really tests your IQ is, what is the concept of1300 million (80)?
You can say this is a mathematical concept, but what I want to tell you is, what is this? God? Big? what's up Fate? Divide! ? .
Come on! Ladies and gentlemen, let's start with warm applause? Bad luck? Patrol (leader applauds).
The tour guide is humorous. Opening remarks 3 Good morning, team members! It is difficult to get up early today. I wonder if you have adjusted your biological clock? A day's work lies in the morning. Why don't you start learning now? Theory of Three Represents theory? Clear your mind.
First of all, I represent? Thank you for your trust! Our agency is a travel agency that respects contracts, keeps promises and pursues quality services. I believe your choice is correct! So-called? I choose, I like it! ? I hope everyone can feel the warmth of home even when they go out to Wan Li.
Secondly, on behalf of the person sitting next to me? Three good drivers? Say hello to everyone! What's our driver's last name? He is a good driver, good-looking, good-natured and first-class in technology. With his skillful driving skills, he will have a good time all the way! Trust our host, let's hear it ~ ~ ~
Finally, I bow to you on behalf of myself! My last name? . You can call me. Guide or small? . Small? Although he is not a great musician, it is no problem to sing a few songs! In the next few days, I hope everyone will cooperate more and support more. If there is an opportunity, it will be small. Be sure to thank everyone with a song! Although I am not the best tour guide, I must be the most attentive tour guide. what can I do for you? The tour guide will try his best to meet your requirements!
So what interesting places are we going to these two days, here? Just briefly introduce the arrangements for these days. . . . . . . . . . . . These places are popular tourist attractions recently. When we arrive there, we will have a local escort to give you a more detailed and vivid introduction. Wait and see!
When traveling, the most important thing is to have fun. But the conditions such as food and shelter are not as good as home, especially the scenic spot we went to. Because of seasonal restrictions, its reception conditions are not particularly good, and there may be some unsatisfactory places. I hope you understand more. But, small? I'll try my best to arrange the trip! If you have any requirements or suggestions, please feel free to put them forward, all for the sake of making our trip smoother and happier ~ ~ ~ Right?
So, next, I want to emphasize the matters that should be paid attention to during the two-day trip.
1. Coach is our second home, so I hope you can keep our home clean and tidy.
2. Because of the influence of typhoon (specific things can be based on the situation at that time), everyone must pay attention to safety. Don't leave the team without authorization, and don't act without authorization. Want to go out and be free, want to be with the children? Explain and ensure safety!
The public security in this area is rather chaotic, so everyone must take good care of valuables such as wallets and mobile phones.
4. Because many of our projects are about playing with water, especially there are many fresh seaweed in the white water, the staff will give you special socks, so wear socks to avoid slipping. (optional)
5.。 . . . . . . . (If there is anything else, please advise and add ~ ~ ~ ~)
Ok, everyone listened to me just now, and the ears need to rest. Now, let's guess some riddles to make our brains move. . . . . . . . .
The tense moment has passed, take a deep breath and let the guide tell you some jokes to relax. . . . . . . . . . . . .
Is everyone still happy? Thank you for supporting me with laughter, and then Xiao Dao sang a song for everyone to express his gratitude. (optional)
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