Are there any jokes about music?

At the concert, a famous singer is singing. At this time, a listener sang along with the vibrato.

"Like a cow!" Her neighbor said angrily.

"Who? Is it me? " The man asked quickly.

"No, not you, the singer. She interfered with our appreciation of your voice. "

listen to music

Little John and his uncle are sitting in the concert hall listening to music.

Uncle: "Do you know music?"

John: "Of course."

Uncle: "What do you think that girl is playing now?"

John: "Piano."

The benefits of learning music

James proudly said to his friend, "My daughter is learning vocal music, which makes me so happy."

"Why, did she let you hear a beautiful song?" "You can't imagine, she let me buy a neighbor's house, and the price is half cheaper. The family has moved away the day before yesterday. "

(of an unknown person) achieved amazing results at the first attempt.

Outside the examination room of the Conservatory of Music, a young girl stopped the examiner.

"Professor, don't you believe that my voice will be a blockbuster one day?"

"Of course, miss. When you are attacked. "

Escape is very important.

The symphony orchestra is rehearsing the last paragraph of Stravinsky's "Ritual of Spring", and the conductor tells us his understanding of various parts of the music: the soft and beautiful horn symbolizes the runaway peasant girl, while the loud trombone and trumpet represent the chasing savage.

When he raised the baton, he flew over from the loudspeaker and said, "Master, do you mind if we play this part faster?"

Who is the most suitable?

A woman and her husband discussed, "I want to put a statue of a master musician on the piano." Who do you think is the most suitable among Mozart, Beethoven and Liszt? "

The husband replied, "Beethoven, of course."

She asked happily, "Why?"

"Because he is deaf."

A failed lullaby

Annie: "My concert was a complete failure!" " "

Jim: "I can't say that. Didn't you see the audience clapping so happily? "

Annie: "It is this burst of applause that makes me sad. I hope that the audience is asleep, like waking up, shaking from side to side, hem and haw ... "

Jim: "Why?"

Annie: "Honey, I sang a lullaby."

Get your life back

A: "Music saved my life in this flood. Music is so precious! "

B: "Oh! Did someone hear your beautiful singing and come to save you? "

Answer: "No, when I was washed away by the flood, my piano just floated over and I climbed up."

Turn it off.

When Cyril visited his least favorite nephew, he had to listen to his nephew play the piano. At the end of the song, my nephew asked, "What do you think?" Cyril replied, "You should be on TV."

His nephew said happily, "Do you think I play well?"

"No," Cyril said, "if you are on TV, I can turn it off."

Music that dogs can't understand.

Thompson's wife is very happy recently. She went to the street to buy a violin and learned to play at home. The squeaking noise bored Thompson to death. One day, the dog at home also barked.

Thompson dared to say to his wife, "honey, can you choose a song that dogs can't understand?"

Willing to die

There is a king who likes playing the piano, but he plays it badly. As soon as he played the piano, everyone ran away. The emperor searched the whole court, but he couldn't find a bosom friend.

He handed down the imperial edict and pulled a condemned man out of prison. The emperor said to him, "As long as you say I play the piano well, I will save you from death."

The condemned man thought, "Isn't this simple?" So he promised to listen to the emperor play the piano.

However, shortly after the king played, the condemned man covered his ears with his hands and shouted, "Your Majesty, stop playing, I would rather die!"

Make great progress

"Our daughter has made great progress in practicing her voice." Mrs. Xiao said to her friend.

"Has the timbre improved?"

"What I said is mainly the volume. In the past, only people on this floor complained, and now residents of several nearby buildings have complained. "

Very/very confused/at a loss/confused/at a loss

A judge took his little son to a concert at the Paris Theatre. A soprano is singing a passionate song.

"Dad, why did that man threaten that woman with his stick?" The child asked.

"Not a threat, he's the conductor."

"If this is not a threat, then why is she screaming so loudly?"

lullaby

Composer: "It took me 10 years to write this lullaby."

Publisher: "What took you so long?"

Composer: "Because it always makes me fall asleep."

quiet

An Irishman came back from a trip to London, and his neighbors asked him how he was doing. He said, "Londoners are so strange. They always knock on your door and wall at night!" " ""What would you do? " "I'm not disturbed. I will continue to play my bagpipes. "