Which one has super hilarious jokes!

A hysteria before the college entrance examination

Vision Wei, a cute girl on the stage, had a violent conflict with her mother before the college entrance examination. Two days before the professional examination, Vision Wei suddenly had a high fever. At that time, the preparation songs prepared by Vision Wei were "Shepherd of Love" and "Dancing Moonlight", and "Shepherd of Love" was also a track sung by Vision Wei at 10 to 1 in Chengdu Division of Happy Boys. But at that time, because of a voice problem, he had to choose to sing Dancing Moonlight.

Wei's mother said that at that time, the time for the professional examination was 10 in the morning, and she began to practice songs after 8 o'clock, but she was afraid that the sound would affect her neighbors. When she turned down the stereo for the second time, "Wei Xiaoguai" was furious, threw the microphone and ran into the room and cried loudly. "Do you know that I can't sing" The Shepherd of Love "? What time? You have to think about it. This is the first time that Vision Wei cried hysterically. Wei's mother froze, tears welled up in her eyes ... The mother and son cried for about half an hour, and Wei's mother adjusted the tone again, practiced the song twice, and went to the exam. After coming out of the examination room for more than an hour, Wei's mother burst into tears when she appeared in front of her mother again as a gesture of "V". Before Chen Wei finished singing a song, the examiner said to prepare for the culture class and continue to work hard! "At that time, Vision Wei scored 94 points in professional courses, ranking first among all candidates who entered for Sichuan Sound!

The little singer at school

In Vision Wei's alma mater, Lanlian No.1 Middle School, Vision Wei is also a minor celebrity. She dominates the campus by singing. At the graduation ceremony of middle school in 2004, a song "Wei" was remembered by many teachers through singing.

A teacher said, "It was the first time I listened to Song Wei, when the students were waving their arms ..." Teacher Liang, the head teacher of Senior One, said that he had matured a lot on the stage of Fast Man, but the feeling of "simplicity and cleverness" remained unchanged. When I was in high school, Vision Wei seldom spoke. Whenever I see him, I grin and never bother the teacher. Although his academic performance is not the best, all the boys and girls in the class like him very much.

The bitterness and joy of "fast man" journey

Some people say that Vision Wei's love life is "at sixes and sevens", and it seems that Vision Wei has become the person with the most negative news about "fast men" this year.

Speaking of these things, Vision Wei said firmly, "I'm worried that my family will be sad to see these false news. I am a man, maybe I will meet all kinds of right and wrong in the entertainment circle in the future. I hope I can bear everything by myself. I don't like the heavy burden on my family because I am looked down upon by others. My mother often encourages me to face everything bravely and be a responsible person. I think this is also my harvest on the stage of' Fast Man'. "

Vision Wei became the third runner-up of "Fast Man". Many netizens on the Internet analyzed that the main reason is that the SMS support rate is too low. However, Vision Wei didn't care: "My popularity is quite good. I can see my oranges everywhere. How can it be low? "

Speaking of family support, Wei said, "The whole family mobilized to vote for me." Vision Wei carefully calculated an account: "A mobile phone voted 15, and a landline voted 15 ... Our family voted for me 45 times a week, which seems quite a lot in one month." For the current results, Vision Wei's face is written with satisfaction ...

Vision Wei said that my mother used to sing Peking Opera, and he remembered that she played the little iron sister in The Red Lantern. She worked in an art troupe when she was young. Later, due to work reasons, she could not pursue further studies, and music became a personal hobby. My father's idols are singers like Yu-Ching Fei and Teresa Teng, but under his leadership, my father also began to listen to singers like Tao Zhe and Wang Leehom. Sometimes when Vision Wei hasn't heard new songs, Dad will take the initiative to call and say, Have you listened to tank's songs recently? I think it suits you. "Now he is very avant-garde."

Besides his parents, Vision Wei is also deeply influenced by his teachers. Speaking of Wang Zhengliang who participated in this competition together, Vision Wei always calls him an idol. Vision Wei said that he adored Mr. Wang so much that he felt that no one could beat him, so he didn't even think about taking his teacher to PK at all, just regarded it as a performance.

Vision Wei said that when he first entered Sichuan Conservatory of Music, he admired Mr. Wang Zhengliang very much. At that time, Wang Zhengliang listened to his CD and covered many singers' songs, including JJ Lin's and Jay Chou's (Q bar). Every song feels different from the original, and Wang Zhengliang's own style is added, which makes Vision Wei appreciate it very much. Vision Wei said that he often went to Mr. Wang's piano room to listen to music, and even once went to the piano room to take an exam. At that time, a good friend wanted to take an examination of a duet song, so he sang "Roof" with his friends, which was the song that Mr. Wang and Jane sang together. Mr. Wang said that since it is a duet, there should be communication. Vision Wei found Mr. Wang's comments short and accurate.

Talking about the super girl of Sichuan Conservatory of Music, Vision Wei said that he and He Jie are still in the same class. During the military training, he sang a Sang Jie at the party, which left a deep impression on Vision Wei. He marveled at the explosive power of the little girl's voice. Vision Wei thought she was a star at that time.

Vision Wei's college entrance examination composition talks about gratitude and hard work

If it was before, I don't think I would remember anything I often said. But now, I am taking part in the "Happy Boys" competition. From the auditions to the regional finals to the national finals, I learned two things that I think are precious, that is gratitude and hard work. There is a saying that I don't often talk about, but it often echoes in my heart: I clenched my fist in my heart and said to all the good and bad eyes: I will cheer! I wonder if this is beside the point. )

"I will refuel!" This sentence seems simple, but it is what I want to express most at present. From an ordinary junior to a player who can confidently face hundreds of audiences, I have seen the fruits of my efforts. At the same time, I also gained a lot in this process.

Encouragement is very important to everyone, especially to a person who is trying to grow up and eager to fly with his dreams. I feel that I have really grown a lot along the way. No matter from the professional aspect, or dealing with people, or how to adjust your mentality when you encounter problems, you have made some new progress more or less. I really feel lucky. There are so many people paying attention to and supporting me along the way. I grew up step by step under these caring eyes, gained a little self-confidence under these support and encouragement, and became a little stronger under some accusations and criticisms, which made me feel that only by doing my best can I live up to everyone's expectations.

It is natural for me to work hard. I have always treated every game with a learning attitude, and every performance has to pay 100% effort. On the stage, I feel less confident when I want to sing and dance alone. But I think that if we work hard, we can break through ourselves and give you a fresh Vision Wei. I practiced hard and got praise from my friends around me. I feel very gratified. I hope I can bring you more surprises in the next competition. Believe in my strength.

PS: I am very dissatisfied with this article, and I feel really embarrassed. Hehe ~ ~, I want to rewrite it when I have the opportunity. I believe it will be quite wonderful after I adjust my sleep, hehe.

The third runner-up of this year's fast men is the fifth youngest player among the top 13 players except Ah Fu, Yue, Ham and Land Rover. Many people didn't expect him to break into the top three in China, not even himself. During the interview, Vision Wei always kept a clear head to look at the results and the future. This boy, who is a junior in the Conservatory of Music, smells mature beyond his age.

I used to be "ambitious"

In the interview, Vision Wei always emphasized the influence of parents and family. Speaking of joining the fast men, he said that he was also encouraged by his father. "Because I studied in the Conservatory of Music and participated in many competitions before, my father said that there must be a competition to try." He also stressed that parents have always been their role models. "From being a person to working, they have taught me a lot, and they have their own set of education. They will always be my role models. "

Vision Wei also said that her love for singing originated from the walkman that her mother bought for herself when she was a child. "I like it very much, so I wear a listening cassette all day. After listening to it, I began to love singing. Later, when there were class meetings and theatrical performances, everyone would say, Vision Wei, perform! I went to sing happily. Slowly, everyone will think of me when they want to sing, and I will like singing more and more. " Later, when he was admitted to Sichuan Conservatory of Music, Vision Wei said he was "ambitious". "When I was a freshman, I had high expectations for myself, so I felt I had to win the prize and participated in many competitions, but my grades were not very good. Up to now, I am a junior, and I gradually find that if I don't expect too much from myself, it will be very effective, because I am more relaxed and have no pressure to participate in the competition. "

Being recognized by the package is the happiest.

After participating in the fast men's competition, Chen Wei made it all the way from the front of Chengdu Division 10 to the top three in China. Vision Wei said, this is never imagined. "At that time, it was not easy to get into the top 50 of the division, because the players in Chengdu Division were particularly strong." Vision Wei said that Judge Bao never liked himself, which is why he dared not "fantasize" about better grades. "Bao teacher didn't like little white me before. The first time he saw me, he thought I was plain-looking and my singing performance was plain. " Finally, Bao finally changed his view of himself. Vision Wei said it was the most unforgettable thing in his whole competition. "Finally, his evaluation of me is' Vision Wei is a very good student. He studied well, made progress and gained experience in the competition'. I'm really happy to hear his words. These words make me happier than saying that I am the best singer or the best performer. "

Jason is very kind to me.

Looking back now, Vision Wei said that his biggest change was to become confident. "In the beginning, I would like to sing what songs and wear what clothes to make others like me. Finally, I began to feel that I just need to sing my favorite songs, because I know that no matter what I sing, people who like me will support me. I feel more confident on stage. I think everyone will like it as long as I fully perform. "

In the "4 into 3", Vision Wei unexpectedly advanced, but Jason, one of the favourites to win the championship, was eliminated, which many people didn't expect. Vision Wei also said that he didn't expect it. "I was ready for the ultimate PK before the game, because my votes were the lowest among the four people. Maybe I played well in that game, too As a result, I successfully advanced to Jason PK. I wasn't worried before he went to PK, but in the end he left. I was shocked and sad, and I cried. "

He said that his relationship with Jason is very good, and Jason has always taken care of himself, so he always hoped that Jason could go further. "Before the game, I was worried that he was difficult to get close to because he had achieved such great success, but he had no shelf at all and was very good to me. Moreover, he has a lot of beautiful clothes, and he will not hesitate to lend them to me during the competition, and he will also lend me the latest and best ones that have not been worn. He feels that this is a respect for me, and I really appreciate him. "

Chen Wei's cold joke

1. What medicine will be lost most?

Answer: ginseng, because of strangers.

2. Moderator: For example, if you want to buy this, how do you bargain?

Vision Wei: Well ... (embarrassed to laugh) ... this is the national unified retail price.

3. A fat woman went to see a slimming doctor. The doctor said that if you eat two pieces of bread and an apple, you will lose a lot of weight in a month! A week later, the woman called the doctor and said, should I eat two pieces of bread and an apple before or after meals?

4. A polar bear has been plucking its hair ... it's so cold!

5. Children in Chen Chen wipe their hands directly on their clothes after eating, and Chen Chen says that the white clothes you wear when you wipe your hands become camouflage clothes!

6.SX said that the beautician said that his skin was dry and he needed to use that hydrating cream more. CC said that you might as well use Nongfu Spring.

7. A medium-rare steak and a medium-rare steak meet without saying hello. Why? Because we don't know each other well. ...

8. What kind of person is Spider-Man?

A: Loser, because he is Spider-Man.

What color is Spider-Man?

Answer: White, because he is Spider-Man.

9. Vision Wei: What is the difference between falling from the second floor and falling from the twentieth floor?

He Yi looked childish: Although I heard this, I still want to ask, what's the difference?

Chen Chen looks sweaty: He fell from the second floor ... Dad ... Ah. Fell from the twentieth floor ... Ah ... Lying down.

10. Q: "What do you want to choose YHM?"

Chen Chen: "Because we are all handsome."

1 1. Xiao Bai looks like his brother. Why?

The truth (image) came out.

12. Sit on a skateboard in the morning ... and move forward with your hands supported. ..

Reporter: Chen Chen, what are you doing?

Chen Chen said quietly: Yesterday was not the Dragon Boat Festival .. I was rowing a dragon boat. ...

13. A turtle built a house, gave a medicine name and covered it in the middle. The tortoise built another house, gave another medicine name and covered it in the middle. That little turtle is crazy. He built more than 300 houses in one breath, and gave him another medicine name. It was so big.

14. When the express train went to Xiangxi, it was surrounded by mountains and the road was slippery. Chen Chen said: "Director, if we fall down, the Happy Boys won't have to be broadcast!"

15. Finally, the host said that there was a gift for Chen Chen.

CC: Really? That's great. Can you come again tomorrow?

16. On the breakfast table, YHM sprayed oil all over his face while eating soup packets. Xixi sat next to the child brought back by YHM and said, "Do you regret being with him?" What a shame, isn't it? "

18. At lunch, I asked Ah Hu and Yue, "Chengde has Lulu, but Changde has what?" ?

19. Chen Chen asked Jason: Jason, what will happen if the shark accidentally eats mung beans?

Jason thought for a long time and couldn't answer! ~ so is everything else,

Chen Chen said with a smile: Mung bean shark! ~ ha ...

20. A black cat and a white cat are walking on the road together. As a result, the white cat fell into the ditch What did the black cat say when the white cat climbed up?

The black cat said, "Meow ~ ~"

2 1. At lunch, Tang Xiao said, "Last night, I was in the toilet when I suddenly heard Vision Wei fans shouting downstairs: Vision Wei! Almost made me constipated. " (Laughter).

Chen Chen said, "Oh, I'm sorry." (Cold) After a while, I asked him, "Did it succeed later?"

22. When the super girl entered the castle, everyone moved their luggage. Some people play tricks and bring the awakened box into the room of the transcendental girl. According to Chen Chusheng, it was put in the lobby on the first floor. When they woke up, they clumsily carried the box out. At this time, they quietly replied with a blank face: wake up, you are really scheming ~

23. Chen Chen asked the child brought by Ham: "You regret following him. Aren't you embarrassed? " Ham has been laughing.

24. He, Jason and Wang Zhengliang get together to take photos during the break. After posing, the three of them said "Chengdu Sanxia" and then said "three musketeers-three musketeers" in the morning, which reminded me of several similar China English words that were popular in Chengdu before. I didn't expect to do as the Romans do in the morning.

25.5 VCR, CC and He Jie: "We are a breakfast (lunch) group!" (Then He Jie is thinking about a slogan), CC said: "We are a combination of morning (sheng) meals, and then we will have food!"