Comfort and care about your wife's news.

Tell your wife a joke. My lovely wife will definitely like it. Hee hee hee.

I went to the toilet today, and the toilet door of the company is about 10cm below the ground. Squatting down for a while, I saw someone reaching in and handing me the paper. I took it out of curiosity. Just as I was about to leave, I heard someone calling next door: Why didn't the newspaper come? My legs are numb ... Did I do something wrong?

Brother: "You have to draft everything first, understand?" Brother: "So Mr. Mom killed you!" " "

Yesterday, I went to the hospital to see a doctor. I saw a sign on the door that said "Non-undergraduate personnel are not allowed to enter". I'm so fucking depressed that I have to get an undergraduate diploma when I'm sick …

Event: The teacher asked me to hand out test papers. I took a dozen papers from the podium and prepared to hand them out. "Send it when you see someone!" "You just met someone! Your whole family meets people! No hair!

Speaking of an idiot female classmate, not long ago she dug up a diary of her mother at home. Looking at it, the first page is her date of birth, and there are only eight words on it: "Ugly to the extreme, extremely disappointed." ...

A female colleague's surname is Xie. This morning, a male colleague greeted the woman: "Good morning, Lao Xie". The woman reacted greatly and angered: "Tell me the word' old'! ! ! ! "。 The male colleague changed his mouth: "Good morning, thank you." After a second of silence, laughter broke out!

One day in class, the teacher talked on it, but it was boring. Many people fell asleep secretly. I was just about to fall asleep when the teacher suddenly said excitedly, didn't your father just buy you two train tickets when you came to college? Is it a hard seat in the classroom and a soft berth in the dormitory?

Maybe you are dissatisfied with the status quo, and feel that you are fat, ugly, depressed, poor, stupid and declining … but please believe that everything will be fine. Slowly, you will feel fat, ugly, frustrated, poor, stupid and weak. ...

Lz lives in the countryside, and there is a girl in the village next door who works outside and loves to pretend to be B, and often shows off her high-end living standard in QQ space! ! Look, here we go again: so many five-star hotels! ! The service is terrible! Lz decisively commented in the following: Now there is water shortage everywhere in the house, and the seedlings are dying. Today, I saw your father pumping water in the field by the river! ! ! ! !

I slapped him 100 the day before yesterday. He was angry, but he was afraid to say it. I slapped him 80 times the next day, and he said he saw the hope of life. On the third day, he slapped him 50 times, and he praised the progress of those who beat him. On the fourth day, he was slapped in the mouth for 30 times, and it was not easy to kneel down and be moved. On the fifth day, he slapped him 20 times, and he was grateful; On the sixth and seventh days ..., he was used to being slapped when he was moved.

In the evening, I was playing darts and drinking happily in a bar when one of my buddies came in and asked me, "Hey, why aren't you at home with your beautiful and plump wife at this time?" I asked, "Then why aren't you?" He said, "because I didn't know you would be here!" " "

I always hear advertisements saying: What should I do if I get pregnant unexpectedly? But I can't figure out how pregnancy can be an accident. Ask an expert for advice.

I finally know what the letters in the second row of the keyboard mean-I fell in love with each other and cried! ! ! . . . . . . Do you know what your first and third rows mean? ~

Working late at night. Suddenly, my eyes are as heavy as iron, and my head is filled with lead. I look at the computer screen and fantasize; The order of the keyboard seems to be a gobbledygook. I hate lying in my clothes without a sofa. After a while, it seemed that someone was calling me. who is it? After listening, I only heard: Every day, three provinces suddenly wake up and unconsciously say to themselves: Is it high? Rich or not? Handsome? Not tall, not rich, not handsome, what can make you feel tired? Why complain? Why are you so tired? Woo hoo, how pathetic our diaosi is. . . . Then go to the place of reincarnation, drink the water of reincarnation, get rid of the tired face, clear your eyes and work silently.

My girlfriend sent me a message early in the morning saying that she had a fever and could not accompany me on May Day. Ask why, and tell me that she fell asleep in front of the refrigerator with the door open last night! If you think this is GC, you are wrong! GC: Yes, she got up in the middle of the night to look for food because she was hungry. As a result, she fell asleep in the refrigerator When her family found her, she still had half a piece of bread in her mouth! How hungry and tired does it have to be to be so sharp? !

The Dragon Boat Festival holiday depends on the "7-day class" to summon 20 13 Dragon Boat Festival holiday arrangements, and it will be connected with the 7-day class before the festival! Holiday from June 10 to June 12 (Monday to Wednesday), ***3 days. Go to work on Saturday, June 8 and Sunday, June 9. At this time, I suddenly felt familiar, and it was the rhythm of 7 days of sleep →3 days of rest →2 days of rest →2 days of rest ... I felt frequent urination. It is suggested that the General Office of the State Council should take more care, eat more foods rich in plant organic active alkali, eat less meat and eat more vegetables.

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