Hat joke

I am on a business trip with a beautiful colleague. I ran for a day on business and went to eat local snacks in the evening. Back to the hotel, just after taking a shower, she sent a text message saying that she was tired all day and had a backache and asked me if I could go over and help her pinch her back. I'll just close it after reading it. Is this still a person? You're not the only one who has been running all day. Why should I wait on you?

Going to my father's house on weekends, my son looked everywhere for a sugar jar and asked his mother-in-law to open it. I said to my mother-in-law, "Don't help him open the sugar jar. His teeth are decayed! Don't spoil him too much! " My mother-in-law said, "Of course I spoil him. He helped me find 3000 yuan in an old sugar jar last week. " At this time, the old father-in-law blinked and did not look away, leaving a silent figure.

When I was in high school, I had a bad stomach for a while, and I wanted to vomit when I smelled fart! Once when I was sleeping in class, I suddenly felt a fart coming. I vaguely remember that my deskmate often grabbed a fart and put it in front of my nose. With my eyes closed, I also grabbed a hand in the same direction. Suddenly, a weak and warm hand grabbed me and looked up as a teacher, which scared me from making money in the future. The teacher said softly, what did you take? I'll take a look and promise not to tell the class teacher. In her expectant eyes, I let go.

When I was a freshman, an Internet cafe near the school held a recharge activity before the National Day, charging 100, but 200 was not capped. Our school is basically male, and there were many people in those days. When I came back from the National Day holiday, the Nima Internet cafe was gone, and a hot pot restaurant was being renovated there. The school steamed bread was sold out that month.

My friend wanted a son very much, but after giving birth to five daughters, there was still none, so he decided to have another one, but it was still a daughter. I can't help it. He said something on his little daughter's full moon wine: If anyone can't find a girlfriend, he can't blame me. I've done my best!

The Chinese New Year is coming, and my wife gave me 10,000 to her family. My mother-in-law was taking a bath when I arrived, so I gave the money to my father-in-law. He said loudly, "Your mother and I don't like spending money very much, so we don't need 6 thousand." Then give me 200.

A person has been partying with friends for three days in a row and spent all his salary. The angry wife scolded for nearly an hour. Then ask him: What do you think if you can't see me for three days in a row? He replied: I think it's quite good. Monday passed and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday passed, and he still hasn't seen his wife. On Thursday, the swelling disappeared a little, and he finally managed to see his wife from the corner of his left eye.

When I was a child, my parents' unit was not far from home. As far as I can remember, they occasionally work the night shift and don't come back until midnight. One night around nine o'clock, my mother came into the house, touched my sister's head and said, "You take care of my sister, my parents have to work overtime." Then I went out with my dad. My sister couldn't sleep that night, crying that my parents had worked too hard for us and wanted to send them hot tea. One chilly night in spring, two little girls walked hand in hand on the road, and her sister was carrying a schoolbag with two thermos cups inside. Walking, we saw my parents eating hot pot at a roadside stall.

Recently, my boyfriend was on a business trip, so I couldn't open the red wine, so I asked a boy next door to open it for me several times. After work, I ran into him in a little panic, handed me a small box and ran away. I thought to myself: it won't be that he likes me. Just as I was thinking about how to refuse without hurting my neighbors, I opened the box and found that the product manual said: automatic bottle opener …

When I was going to bed last night, my wife suddenly asked me, "If you had the chance, would you cheat?" Thinking about how to answer to satisfy her, she sighed again: "Oh, forget it, don't say it. If there is an opportunity, I may not grasp it myself. "