The host and Degang Guo tell jokes.

1, "Grandpa, how can I go to America?" Ask the village chief. Please speak loudly. There is no need for electricity. I am a rich man. Today, backstage, I drove here and they all came on foot. The old gentlemen in Tianjin began to leave on Tuesday. But my car has had some problems recently, and the speed is a bit slow. At first, I thought the carburetor was dirty, but I didn't know until I checked it ... 4. There were more than 1000 traditional cross talks left by the old man. After years of continuous efforts by our actors, it has basically been lost ... 5. English, Japanese, Korean, Yugoslav, North Slavic, West Slavic ... can speak seven or eight foreign languages, and there are six. The house where we live is full of holes. It is fatal when it rains: it rains outside the rain house, and it rains outside the rain house. Sometimes it rains so hard that the whole family takes shelter in the streets. 7. If you are willing to die, I am willing to bury it. 8. Grenade is expensive. If it is one yuan and six yuan, I will throw you one hundred yuan first. 9. Degang Guo: I finished my work as soon as I came, and built a chimney of more than 70 meters! Yu Qian: Not bad! Degang Guo: Get up early and get the job done. People come to check and accept, but they won't give us money anyway! Yu Qian: Is the quality not good? Degang Guo: I started to turn the drawings upside down, and people asked me to repair the well! 10, do you have a two-foot lobster? Sorry, there is nothing two feet long, only two feet seven. What stupid restaurant doesn't even have a two-foot lobster? Let's have a plate of shredded potatoes. 1 1, cross talk pays attention to four lessons: pit, deception, abduction and deception. 12, this matter is not far from now. If there is an old man in your family, you can go back and ask him-Spring and Autumn Period and Warring States Period 13, Yu Qian, well, no matter how you deal with people and do business on stage, to be honest, bah! ..... no, just now, there was a bug in my mouth ... 14, what's your name here? Don't say that. You said it was a curse. You said 15, one or two beers, four peanuts. Wait a minute, here is one (pick one on the ground), just three .4038+06. Going forward is another question mark. When touched, a flower will appear. After eating the flowers, Liu Bei raised his hand and said, "DuDu DuDu" can shoot bullets! Here comes the tortoise with wings. 17. Eat steak instead of beef. I like onions, but put more onions. 18. Guo: golden bell jar, iron underpants. Y: Iron underpants? It's an iron shirt! Guo: Our pronunciations are different in Russian. 19, your marriage is unfortunate! Married twice in middle age, the first time the woman was taken back by her master; That woman became the daughter-in-law of your apprentice for the second time. 20, the old vines are faint crows, and the bridges are flowing. The old road is sparse and the sun sets. The heartbroken man is in the hospital at 2 1. "There is good news and bad news. Which one do you listen to? " "What's the bad news?" "We are lost. I don't know this place. It is estimated that we can only live by cow dung in the future. " "What's the good news?" "Cow dung have a plenty of! ! 22. Your father is very capable. If you poke a noodle into the lock, it will open. A pack of instant noodles can open a community. 23. You are calling your wife: Pan Xiao! Pan? Jinlian? Guo: Unlike you, I have a father. Y: who? I have a father too. Guo: I'm a relative. 25. Many cross talks are made up, but this one is true. 26. It looks like a car accident scene. 27. There are quite a lot of Japanese in China now, and I hate Japanese. There are many Japanese where I live. There is a couple, although the Japanese are generally not tall, but this couple is extremely tall, male 1.2 m, female 1. 1 m, they have been playing aristocratic sports and love golf. When they are free, they always hit a small steel ball with a small stick and pick it up. After the ball hits 10 meter, it will take them half a day to pick it up. They had a good time. One day, it broke down. After the fight, I went to find that I had broken someone else's glass. Looking through the glass, there is a broken antique vase inside, and their ball is on the ground next to it. They knocked at the door at once. When they saw a man inside, they said, Sorry, we accidentally broke the glass and antiques while playing ball. Let's apologize. The man said, don't apologize, I have to thank you both. These two Japanese people don't understand. What's going on here? The man said, I am not an ordinary person. I am a fairy. I stayed in that vase all the time. You saved my life today. I can't come out until the vase is broken. Wow, the couple were happy and told the fairy that they all said they could make a wish and help us do anything after saving the fairy. The fairy said, well, ask if you have any requirements. The man said, I want land and resources in China. Do you agree? The fairy said, well, you can have it when you go home. The woman said, I want all the gold and jewels in China. The fairy said that when you go home, you will have gold and jewels. At this time, the fairy said, my fairy has limited strength and can only promise you 1 person 1. I have to keep 1 for myself. Can you satisfy me? The couple said, no problem. We Japanese are the most honest. We assure you. Go ahead. The fairy said, I have been in the vase 1000 years. I am very happy to meet your wife today. I wish I could stay in bed with your wife for a while. The Japanese man was very unhappy and said, you have to add 5 yuan. The fairy said, the money will be in your bed when you get home. The fairy brought the woman into the house. The man is waiting outside. After waiting for 2 hours, the door opened and the fairy and the lady came out. They sat down to have a rest. The fairy smoked a cigarette and said, how old are you? The Japanese said, we are all 27. The fairy said, at the age of 27, you are still so simple-minded. Do you still believe there are immortals in the world? 28, your shameless appearance, I have the charm of the year. 29. Huh? You don't know me? I am an artist! I have been an artist for more than a week ... 30. The sage taught us: Don't touch the master's dry food 31-it's a false tooth-throw it away quickly. Don't throw it away, it's too bad. -Why? -Attach a stick as a tickle. 32. Yu Qian: I soaked in that horse's urine! Degang Guo: Formalin! 33, ok! This plane is like Dafa, shaking the glass! In Dafa, Li Xia didn't report to Tianjinwei. Without Dafa, they all went to the United States ... After flying to the United States for half a year, they added more than 40,000 oil. 34. The old fox fairy saw Xiao Xinu flying around the imperial city: "Come here, come here, you are speeding! Do you know that?/You know what? Do you know that?/You know what? "35. As soon as I came on stage, I told my master to listen carefully. Be sure to say hello to me when you go to the bathroom. There are many people backstage, and you can't run away even if you fight behind closed doors (on the status quo of cross talk for 50 years). 36. Guo: Hey ~ ~! There was an opportunity to make money before me, but I didn't cherish it. The opportunity passed and I regretted it. If God gives me another chance, I want to say to the village chief: I am willing to go. If I have to put a limit on that salary, I hope it is: 400 yuan. Punishment: Look at my promise! (Learning to broadcast) Flight 36.95438+04, Xizhimen to Daxing Huangcun. The fare is 5 yuan. Please board the plane. How interesting you say this is. The flight attendants will shout when they stand there. Let's go, let's go. There are big seats, there are big seats. 37. As soon as I walked to the door of Yansha, I burst into tears. When will such a big deal be mine? 38. "The first part is' the wind blows the waves on the water', what is the second part?" "You are so stubborn, you can't make a copy and post it over there." For more jokes about Degang Guo and Yu Qian, please watch www.hongchenrensheng.com. 39. "Me and the ... Demolition Office patted our eyes (it seems to be a slip of the tongue)-striking the table and staring at our eyes. ""shot blind. "(An De Guang Sha Wan) 40." What line do monkeys fear most? " "High-voltage line, let alone monkeys, I am afraid of this." "No, I am most afraid of parallel lines, because they never intersect (bananas). "(Learning Melody) 42." What should I do? I'm so rich. I don't know how to spend it Hey? ! Yu Qian, why don't I take care of you? ！” "Ah" "No, no matter how rich I am, I have to choose my looks! "43. Listening to cross talk shows that you are patriotic. There is a child near our home who can speak seven or eight foreign languages, such as English, Japanese, Korean, Yugoslav, North Slavic and West Slavic ... Anyway, it's okay to sit with the G8 and swear! Tell him you listen to cross talk. "Don't go! Don't understand! "... the law doesn't care if I kill him! I can speak seven or eight foreign languages, but I can't understand cross talk ... 44. I am a rich man. Today, backstage, I drove here and they all came on foot. The old gentlemen in Tianjin began to leave on Tuesday. But my car has had some problems recently, and the speed is a bit slow. At first, I thought the carburetor was dirty. I won't know until I check. I dropped my pedal. ...

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