Lose weight joke

Slimming joke: In the slimming club I joined, the most successful slimming is an old woman. ? How did you do that? We asked. ? It's simple. She said,? Every night at six o'clock, I have to take off my false teeth. ? More wonderful jokes are in the joke column, welcome to enjoy!

Slides of slimming jokes (1) 1. Q: I exercise on the treadmill to lose weight. How can I use the treadmill reasonably and lose weight faster? A: Carrying a treadmill.

Run to lose weight!

2. Q: I don't eat breakfast and dinner, but I only eat lunch, but I still can't lose weight. Can someone give me some advice? A: The master said.

If you don't eat lunch, you can definitely reduce it!

3. q:

I don't like sports,

I can't stand the pain of dieting,

I don't want to take diet pills either,

Is there any way to reduce it? A:

Sure！ Hold on to your dream, and it will come true!

4. Q: To seek a strict and effective weight loss plan, it is urgent to lose weight! Answer: get up, I have no good ideas for the time being!

5. Doctor:

?

The only way to get rid of excess fat is to exercise.

?

Exercise as much as possible.

?

A:

?

That's bullshit！ My wife spends it every day.

She keeps talking, but her chin is always double.

?

Slimming paragraph (2) 1 mom is a foodie, but she is determined to lose weight and is dieting every day. One day, my father cooked a delicious table. My father and I ate it with relish, while my mother watched patiently. Finally, dad said calmly, "I don't know what you're messing around with, and I'm not quitting."

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Two families have a second-rate wife who recently made up her mind to lose weight and resolutely refused to eat sweet things. Yesterday, I saw the unfinished chocolate in the refrigerator, all kinds of saliva, tangled, and finally I had to eat a piece. As soon as I put it in my mouth, I saw her squatting next to me and said pitifully, Is it delicious? Let me smell your breath!

The doctor advised a very fat person to play golf as a weight loss exercise. "That doesn't suit me," said the patient. "I tried it before. If I put the ball where I can hit it, I can't see it. On the other hand, as long as I put the ball where I can see it, I can't play anymore! "

In order to prevent weight gain, the fourth wife posted a poster of a slim beauty in a bathing suit on the refrigerator door, reminding herself to open the refrigerator less and get something to eat.

Sure enough, she lost four kilograms, but her husband gained seven kilograms.

A fat man asked a doctor for a panacea to lose weight. The doctor said: You should drink more tea. ?

? I drink almost every day. ?

? You should exercise more and sleep less. ?

? I only sleep for three hours every day, and I exercise most of the time. ? The fat man said seriously.

The doctor is anxious: then, if you only eat a piece of bread every day, you will definitely lose weight. ?

The fat man said happily:? Great! But before or after meals?

Slimming joke (3) 1, I lost weight

The wife stood on the weighing scale and said happily to her husband. Honey, come and see, I've lost two kilograms! ?

? Honey, that's because you haven't put on makeup yet. ?

2. Image contrast

A fat woman came to a meat stall and wanted to spend 725 yuan on four Jin of pork.

? Are you amazing? The salesman said? Just buy five catties! ?

The fat woman quickly explained:? You don't know, I'm on a diet. I lost four pounds and 725 yuan. I want to see how big this piece of meat is. ?

3, the doctor's concerns

A doctor said to the fat woman who came to ask for weight loss. What worries me is not your weight, but your height. According to the ratio of weight to height, you should be at least 2.3 meters. ?

4. Who wants to lose weight?

In class, the teacher talks about the topic of human body heat consumption.

? The calories burned by kissing? She said,? It can be as high as 45 calories. ?

A boy shouted:? Do any girls want to lose weight?

5, little change

Q: Why have I lost weight 16 kg? My appearance has not changed much. . . . . .

A: An elephant has lost 26 pounds, but its appearance has not changed much.

I don't have any good ideas at the moment.

Q: To seek a strict and effective weight loss plan, it is urgent to lose weight!

Answer: get up, I have no good ideas for the time being!

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