What are the hilarious jokes about summer?

1. "I'm a little bird" is playing on the stereo, and I indulge in singing "I'm a little bird ..."

My wife said coldly, "Oh, you're quite self-aware!"

2. My wife said to me tenderly, "Dear, it turns out that we are a natural couple, a perfect pair. I am best at "stealing vegetables", and you are best at cooking. Together, we are a rare "dragon!"

3. To attend a friend's wedding, I dressed up in front of the mirror before I left. My wife has been watching coldly.

When I got everything ready, I looked at myself in the mirror, snapped my fingers with satisfaction and said, "Wife, give me the gift money."

The wife said coldly, "What gift money do you need? Dressed so decently, put the red flower with the word' groom' on your clothes later, and you will be waiting to receive the gift. "

4. My wife said to me, "Who said,' Is yours mine, mine or mine?' This is simply contempt for family harmony.

Dear, please rest assured that in our family, there is no Empress Wu Zetian or Empress Dowager Cixi, and we will always be equal: the housework is yours and the TV remote control is mine; The loan card is yours, and the salary card is for me ... "

5. My wife and husband are flirting in the bathroom.

My wife said that you should lose weight, and the stupid husband argued with her and said, "Where am I getting fat? Where is the fat? "

The wife took a basin of water with a washbasin and poured it down from her husband's head!

underwear is not wet!

6. My husband was sleeping in bed with his daughter-in-law. When he saw that one of his daughter-in-law's hair had fallen off,

he picked it up and put it on himself.

The daughter-in-law said, "What are you doing picking up my hair?"

The husband said, "Pretend you are interrogating me and ask me where this hair came from!"

She said seriously, "Tell me honestly, where did this hair come from?"

My husband said calmly, "From the pig ..."

7. My wife took my shirt and

asked with a suspicious face, "Say it? Why is there a lipstick print of a woman on the collar? " .

"I can explain!"

"Needless to explain, I know this color number and smell is mine. You put it up on purpose for me to find out,

in order to appear very popular, in fact, you will always be a diaosi that nobody cares about!"

8. The first time a husband made his wife angry, she stared at him playing games.

He was embarrassed by the stare.

He put his hand on her chest with an idea.

The husband said, "My present action can describe your present expression!"

she said, "what?"

The husband said, "How fierce!"

then my wife smiled.