How old is the best age to get married

taboo of marriage age: marriage should not be too early or too late

Generally speaking, men should marry when they are older, and women should marry when they are older. The age of men and women should not exceed the normal marriage age by too much. If you are too old for marriage, you will be suspected. Why are you so old and unmarried? Why are you so old and unmarried? The pressure of public opinion alone is enough. There is a saying in the Han nationality that? Daughter can't stay when she is older. Stay and stay and become enemies. ? It's about not marrying your daughter when she's older. Because young men and women don't get married when they are old enough to get married, I'm afraid they will do something, just as the old saying goes? If men don't marry and women don't marry, I'm afraid it will make a big joke. .

however, what is the appropriate age for marriage? There are different habits and customs in different times in China. Before and during the Western Zhou Dynasty, it was generally believed that men were thirty and women were twenty. "Zhou Li? Magistrate? Media's cloud:? Men and women have become famous since they became famous. Marry a man at thirty and a woman at twenty. ? Book of Rites? Neize "cloud:? (Male) At the age of 2, he won the championship and began to learn etiquette. ? When you have a room at the age of 3, you can only manage men. ? (Female) Five times out of ten. Marry at twenty. There is a reason, married in 23 years. ? It can be seen that when a man is married in his thirties, he will have a time to learn the knowledge of etiquette and righteousness after the coronation. In addition, it is also based on the consideration that marriage is beneficial to the next generation after the human body matures. Such as "White Tiger Tong" cloud:? Male 3, strong bones and muscles, any father; Female 2, full of skin and muscles, any mother. 5, should be the number of big Yan, everything is born. ? (See also The Book of Rites? Faint? Of course, the restriction of marriage age sometimes changes due to social and political turmoil, frequent wars and economic development. For example, in the early Spring and Autumn Period, Qi Huangong once lowered the age of women's marriage by five years for hegemony. Order? A husband marries at thirty, but a woman marries at fifteen? . Later, Gou Jian, the king of Yue, ordered:? If a man is twenty and a woman is seventeen, it will be a crime to his parents. ? Later, in the Southern and Northern Dynasties, the age of marriage was reduced to fifteen for men and thirteen for women. This is about the lowest marriage age in Chinese history. At the beginning of the Tang Dynasty, the age of marriage was raised to 2 for men and 15 for women. In the middle and late Tang dynasty, it fell to the level of fifteen men and thirteen women. Until the Ming and Qing dynasties, the minimum legal age for marriage was still 16 for men and 14 for women. In the early days of the founding of the People's Republic of China, the new marriage law stipulated that the marriage age should be 2 for men and 18 for women. In 198 it was changed to? Men should not be earlier than 22 years old, and women should not be earlier than 2 years old. ?

In addition to the national and ethnic laws, the age of civil marriage is also different. Generally, rural areas are on the low side and towns are on the high side. In rural areas, it is customary to marry early, while in cities, people are willing to marry late. Generally, in rural areas, when men are 2 and women are 18, they begin to propose marriage. As soon as they reach the specified age, they get married immediately, and some even lie about their age and get married early. This is still? Early son and early successor? Old ideas are at work. In cities, people usually get married in their thirties and twenties. I also accept the truth of family planning, late marriage and late childbirth more naturally and consciously. Some ethnic groups still have some special taboos on the age of marriage. For example, Daur women are forbidden to get married at the age when their mothers give birth to themselves. It is also forbidden to get married at even ages such as sixteen, eighteen and twenty, thinking that it is unlucky to get married at even ages. Generally, people get married at odd ages between fifteen and twenty, but men don't have this taboo. In the old days, most poor She people married their daughters when they were 14 or 15 years old, while rich people often married their daughters when they were 19 or 2 years old. No matter rich or poor, it is taboo to marry a woman at the age of eighteen. It is considered unlucky to get married at the age of eighteen. Whether men or women get married at the age of eighteen, will they be affected after marriage? Eighteen difficulties? Therefore, both men and women are forbidden to get married at the age of eighteen; Contrary to the taboo of Daur nationality, Jinuo young men and women prefer to get married at even ages. If a man is 2 years old, it is appropriate for a woman to get married at the age of 18. They forbid a man to get married at the age of 19 and a woman at the age of 17.

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taboo of marriage age: the age difference between men and women should not be too big

Some of the above taboos of marriage age can be controlled unilaterally. Other taboos about the age of marriage need to refer to the age of both men and women. For example, there are many taboos about the age difference between men and women. Generally speaking, the Han nationality is older than the female, but it is also taboo that the age difference between the two sides is too big. If the difference is more than ten years old, it will be condemned by public opinion. Don't marry less wives when you are old? ，? Don't marry fewer wives when you are old, but marry fewer wives to be carefree? . This may be suspected of being different generations, or it seems to be out of a psychology that is almost forbidden to incest. Before liberation, there was a custom of a little son-in-law in some areas of the Han nationality. When a boy was in his teens, he married a girl of seventeen or eighteen. Most of them are out of the idea of treating their daughter-in-law as a labor force, and marrying their daughter-in-law as early as possible, which is a form of oppression against women. This kind of marriage has caused great pain to women and is now banned.

When there is no age difference between men and women, there is also a saying that Han people avoid the age difference of three, six or nine years. It is not good for marriage to think that you will commit punishment, assault, punishment and harm. It is generally taboo for women to be older than men. Especially taboo women are one year older than men. As the saying goes:? A female freshman, not a wife. ? It is also a simple taboo for women to be one year older than men. Western Henan is commonly known as:? Female freshman, golden fly; Female sophomore, gold is long. ? It means that a woman is one year older than a man, and she will break the bank after marriage, but a woman is two years older than a man, but she will make a fortune after marriage. It is taboo that a woman is much smaller than a man, saying that the bigger she is, the more she knows that she is distressed by a man, and the more he enjoys. Yi taboo? Female junior? . I think that women are three years older than men and it is unlucky to get married. There are also people in the Han nationality who avoid being born in the same year for both men and women. Especially avoid being born in the same year and month. There is a common saying in Henan:? Same age, different months, same month uterus deficiency. ? Marriage between people born in the same year and the same month will affect the reproduction of the next generation.

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taboo of marriage age: marriage according to rows

in terms of taboo of marriage age, it is also related to the ranking of brothers and sisters. For example, the old taboo that Dai people can't get married when they are male or female. According to the legend of the Dai people, it is common to think that a man who marries three women and marries four can't grow old together, or his family will be unlucky and childless for life; Uzbek, Jingpo and Han people have the custom of getting married in the order of brothers and sisters, and if they violate the order, they will be taboo. Uzbek people, according to traditional customs, young men and women must follow the principle of "first growing up, then young" when they get married. Brother is unmarried, brother can't marry first, and sister can't marry first; My sister is unmarried, my brother doesn't marry, and my sister can't marry; The same is true of Jingpo people. If you want to marry the second daughter first, the man must give the eldest daughter a cow as a gift for crossing the line, and the second daughter should also send necklaces (some worth two or three cows) to her sister to express her apology for having to marry first. Brothers should also consider the order of marriage. If there is no special reason, the younger brother will never get married before the older brother. Han people also have this taboo, but it is not very strict. If the younger brother marries before the elder brother, or the younger sister marries before the elder sister, he always apologizes to the elder brother and elder sister, or always feels that he has done something wrong to the elder brother and elder sister. Because in any case, this is always out of order, and it involves the marriage of men and women, so it seems to have some approximate relationship with incest, so it is taboo.

However, marriage is not always done in line. In ancient times, did the Han people have it? The eldest daughter is not allowed to marry? The custom of. According to Hanshu? Geography ",Qi Xianggong,? So that the parents and daughters of the Chinese people are not allowed to marry, named? Witch? , for the main temple. Married people are not good for their families, and people still think it is vulgar? . Although it was Qi Xianggong who first did this to have an affair with his twin sister (as a cover for her promiscuity), it finally formed a marriage custom of an era. Under this custom, the marriage of the second daughter is no longer restricted by her sister, because her sister never marries.

taboo of marriage age:

The taboo of marriage age mentioned above is reasonable and scientific, except that the age difference between men and women should not be too big, and marriage should not be too early or too late. Besides, it is reasonable to get married according to rows, which can show that young people respect older people. As for those even and odd taboos, and male juniors, sixers and niners; The taboo of being a freshman and a junior, and the taboo of being a man and a woman are idealistic and have no scientific basis. From the real marriage, it is not difficult to find examples that can prove that these taboos are nonsense. What's more, it made a great fuss about the age and birthdates of both parties, and perfunctory a set of taboo principles of marriage with birthdates and five elements. That is, xiangke? The truth of whether thieves harm each other or not, and use this to judge the good or bad of marriage.

Now, the horoscope is out of fashion, and few people believe it any more. But in the old days, this set of procedures was very cautious and strict. Han people usually write the dates of birth of both men and women on a piece of red paper through the contact of matchmakers, commonly known as? Geng tie? . Don't use white paper for Geng stickers. If the words on it are even, avoid singular. If it is singular, it can be added under the male name. Jian? Word, female name? Rui? Words to make up a double number. After exchanging Geng posts, both men and women placed their posts on shrines in their own homes, and some pressed the posts in front of the memorial tablet of the Kitchen God, and then burned incense to the ancestors of the gods. If three sticks of incense are burned neatly, it is considered auspicious; if three sticks of incense are burned unevenly, it is considered auspicious? Is there a length? , unlucky, and therefore dare not to get married. In other areas, a bowl of clear water is placed next to the shrine. If no moths and insects fall into the bowl within three days, it is a sign of good luck. If moths and insects fall into the bowl within three days, it is considered unlucky, so they dare not talk about marriage again. In short, within three days after receiving the Geng paste, it is time to listen to the instructions of the ancestors.

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In addition to the above two forms of divination, the Han, Yao, She and other ethnic groups are also afraid of accidents such as broken bowls and lamps, broken chopsticks, human and animal diseases, quarrels and fights, robbers, fires, barking dogs and haunted houses. If such a thing happens, it will be attributed to the dissatisfaction of the ancestor god with this marriage, so the eight characters should be returned immediately. This marriage will naturally fall through. If it is safe within three days, it will be considered that the ancestral god has approved it and it is auspicious, and the marriage can continue. The next step is to hand over the horoscope of both men and women to the fortune teller? Cost-effective Let's see if there is any danger of mutual restraint. If there is no bad luck, you can continue the following marriage ceremony; If you find that there is a mutual gram in the eight characters, you should stop immediately and stop there. It can be seen that the combination of eight characters occupies a very key position in the old marriage customs. And? Eight characters? Is something that everyone can't help themselves. Once born, the eight characters are fixed, and no one can change it. What do you mean? When you fall into the soil, you will be killed. ? Therefore, this method of combining the eight characters is completely a fatalistic inference and has no scientific reason. I don't know how many pairs of good marriages in the past have been separated by it. This kind of feudal superstition can only increase and strengthen people. Everything is life, and nothing can't be helped? Negative illusion, can't have the slightest sense of progress.

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as for the principle of horoscope, there are many. For example, when a man chooses a wife, he should pay attention to the character of the woman. Fu xing? 、? Child star? . If the husband star and the son star are obvious and undamaged, it is a good marriage. If you marry them, you can be prosperous and beneficial, and your husband will be honored. If the husband's star and son's star are dim, they will be taboo. There is also a good marriage for both men and women. If one is strong and one is weak, then the male life is slightly stronger and the female life is slightly weaker. The most taboo is that the female life is strong, the male life is weak or the male life is strong and the female life is weak. Will one party be defeated by the other? Dying? Yes. However, how to calculate the fate of the eight characters is a matter for fortune tellers. Although they also have? Gengchen rushed to Jiaxu, and Bingzi rushed to Gengwu? Wait a minute. A set? Tian ke di chong? The method of calculation, but after all, it is calculated, not something in folk memory. Although this kind of calculated good fortune and bad fortune has the effect of interfering with folk beliefs, obviously, it can't be regarded as pure folk beliefs, just as all social systems can interfere with and influence folk beliefs, but it can't be regarded as folk beliefs. In addition, this kind of fortune teller's inference often presents a changeable, utilitarian and practical cultural appearance, which is added on the basis of folk beliefs? Practical literati? Or? Practical homo sapiens? The creation of a living? Speaking? , which contains a fixed way of deduction, but also mixed with prophecies, folk philosophy, folk beliefs and personal experience and so on. Because it has gone beyond the scope of folk beliefs, I won't say much here.