The Eleven Shadows of Grandmother's Bringing up Grandchildren-The Great Confrontation of Two Generations' Educational Concepts

There is a gap of 2 or 3 years between the two generations of parenting concepts. Coupled with social changes and lifestyle changes, there will be some friction when taking care of children. Dr. Abao cited more common situations, hoping to help parents communicate with their elders.

First of all, we must be grateful to our elders for their willingness to help take care of our children, and the words of thanks should be on our lips from time to time. Because no matter how expensive and caring a professional nanny is, she can't love our children as sincerely as her grandparents.

However, there is a gap of 2 or 3 years between the two generations in the concept of parenting. Coupled with social changes and lifestyle changes, there will be some friction when taking care of children. How can modern thinking and traditional ideas gain knowledge depends on wisdom to convince their elders, for example, by "saying what they want to say through others' mouths" and leaving some room for communication.

In fact, elders love children as much as we do. As long as the ultimate goal is to be good for children, it is the best policy for us to talk in circles and avoid arguing with elders. Sometimes a joke and a white lie can be used to easily resolve many conflicts.

However, for elders with strong traditional ideas, one is to complain less and accept their parenting model with resignation; One is to seek external caregivers with the same ideas, such as nannies, nursery centers, or kindergartens, to resolve disputes arising from two generations of upbringing. In view of the differences between the two generations on parenting issues, Dr. Abao cited more common situations, hoping to help parents communicate with their elders.

S1. Grandma said: The baby should drink water besides milk!

it's not that babies can't drink water, but for babies who haven't added non-staple food, as 8% or 9% of breast milk or formula milk is water, as long as they are fed on time, there will be no doubt about water shortage, so there is no need to supplement water.

Although the baby doesn't need to drink water after drinking enough milk, it doesn't have to be so strict that he can't drink a mouthful of water. After drinking milk, he can let the baby drink some water and rinse his mouth to clean his mouth. However, taking too much water will reduce the normal milk quantity, and the baby will get insufficient nutrition, which will also cause the burden on the baby's kidneys! ?

As for babies who start to eat non-staple food, when the total milk quantity in a day starts to decrease, they need to start to replenish water. But don't forget that the fruits, porridge and soup you usually eat contain water, and remember that there is no need to force your child to drink too much water.

S2. Grandma said: Add calcium powder to the formula and cook bone soup for the baby, so that calcium will be enough?

In the past, materials were scarce, formula milk was expensive and not popular, and the nutritional components were not as rich and complete as now, so many elders had this idea. If parents want to replenish calcium for their children, they must first understand the absorption of calcium and use it with the help of vitamin D. If you only supplement calcium, it will increase your baby's blood calcium concentration, which may increase kidney calculi's chances. ?

In addition, the calcium content of Dagutang is less than one-tenth of that of dairy products, and the lead and other heavy metals left in the bones will be released into the soup after boiling, which is actually harmful to the baby's health.

In principle, it doesn't matter if you eat bone soup occasionally, but it is not recommended as the only source of calcium supplement. Other foods rich in calcium, such as dried fish, cheese and black sesame, should also be taken in more. As for calcium powder, Dr. Abao suggested saving money and buying natural ingredients.

S3. Grandma said: Only when the baby is chubby can it be healthy! Snacks and drinks can be eaten at all!

In previous years, it was not easy to raise a baby to be fat in vain, so once the baby was raised well, it would naturally have face if it was taken out to be loved by everyone. However, recent studies have found that people who are obese when they are young are more likely to be obese when they grow up than others. The reason is that after a child develops a diet habit that is easy to get fat, it is easy to continue to maintain the same diet pattern when he grows up, so that he continues to get fat when he grows up.

So the baby's growth depends not only on his weight, but also on his height and head circumference. The most important thing is to let children develop correct and healthy eating habits. The elders let their children eat snacks and drink drinks, thinking that children love sweet food, but they don't know that this habit of children is actually developed.

In the face of this situation, don't blame the elders first. We should remind them that snacks and drinks are often synthetic rather than natural, and then consider the endless stream of "dirty" products. The raw materials used to be used for industrial purposes are now used as food, which is of course more harmful to the human body. Children are still growing up, and if these ingredients accumulate in the body, causing chronic poisoning and even affecting brain development, I believe the elders are not happy!

Moreover, letting children eat snacks, sweets or drinks before meals will make their blood sugar rise instantly, and when they want to eat dinner, they will lose their appetite, so their nutrition intake will be unbalanced! We can try to replace cookies and sweets with more natural dried fruits, nuts or homemade desserts when the elders feed them to children. When the elders feed their children drinks, switch to natural fruit juice or encourage them to feed boiled water. The healthier the child eats, the more assured everyone will be!

S4. Grandma said: Children eat too slowly by themselves, and the food is easy to get cold and get dirty, so it is faster to feed them directly. It's too hard for children to sit in dining chairs. We used to hold and feed them. It's normal to chase him for dinner!

The elders are used to feeding their children. Even if the children grow up, they still expect to feed them, because they think they are needed by their children, so that the dining environment will not be polluted. However, it is normal for children to eat in disorder when learning to eat, because in the process of practice, they eat in disorder because of uncoordinated hands and eyes and poor use of tableware. But after every meal every day and practice again and again, it will get better and better.

However, the elders' continuous feeding makes the children lose the ability to take care of themselves in study and life. Children don't need to eat with their hands, and naturally they won't concentrate on eating. The eating time may drag on longer and longer. If you don't have the habit of sitting in a dining chair, of course, there will be a chase after eating, and the elders will chase the children every time they feed.

It will be boring and stressful for children to eat slowly if they are not allowed to feel the joy of operating tableware at an early age, or if their curiosity about food is suppressed. After children are used to being fed, they may not be able to feel the real hunger!

Eating habits are formed at an early age. If the method is wrong at first, it may cause feeding difficulties for children in the future. Once a child loses interest in "eating", when he is asked to eat, of course he will run after you! But time is precious, it should be used to enjoy the delicious food, not spent on the chase of forced feeding. The elders have spent most of their lives raising our generation, and now they should be fooling around with their grandchildren, instead of bad karma serving the golden grandchildren at home.

S5. Grandma said: If the child's hands are icy, he should add clothes, so that he won't catch cold if he crosses more!

there is a kind of coldness called "grandma thinks you are cold"! The blood circulation of children's hands and feet is worse than that of adults, which is easily affected by the external temperature, but their body temperature is higher than that of adults. If they keep adding clothes, they will sweat more and may have a hot rash on their skin. In addition, the body temperature of infants and young children may continue to rise, resulting in a false diagnosis of fever.

Therefore, please stick to a principle that children should wear as many clothes as adults wear! Sneezing is not necessarily a sign of a cold, and sometimes temperature changes can also cause sneezing!

S6. Grandma said: Let the baby practice toilet early, and quit diapers quickly! ?

In the past, diapers were very expensive. In order to save money, elders wanted their children to quit diapers as soon as possible, which is understandable. However, forcing children to go to the toilet too early may lead to children's anxiety, but it may delay the time to learn to go to the toilet by themselves, and may also cause urination and even lead to subsequent urinary tract infections.

At present, it is suggested to start at the age of one and a half to two, but there is no hard and fast rule on when to start, and it still depends on the child's psychological and physical development. Parents and children should be prepared before starting, and there is no need to "sip and break the bowl"! ?

S7. Grandma said: Don't let the baby cry. Is it easier to hernia if you cry more?

because the baby can't talk, the only language he can use is crying. Crying is a normal response when there is a physiological need or physical discomfort.

He will cry because he is hungry, cry because his diaper is wet, cry because he wants to eat a pacifier, cry because his towel is too hot, cry because he wants to sleep, and even cry because of colic ... As for whether a baby likes to cry or not, it is also related to his natural temperament. A high-demand baby just needs company and likes to be hugged. When you meet all your baby's needs and cry again, make sure that his condition is safe, and it's okay for him to cry.

As for hernia, the peritoneal sheath process located in the groin is not closed after the baby is born. When the baby cries, vomits or coughs violently, the abdominal pressure increases, forcing the internal organs to fall into the groin and even the scrotum. Therefore, if the peritoneal sheath process is closed, no matter how you cry, you won't cry to hernia. If you know the reason clearly, you don't need to be so worried.

S8. Grandma said: The head shape of prone sleep is more round!

elders often think that children who lie prone will sleep more stably and have a beautiful head shape. However, compared with sleeping on the back, the risk of sudden infant death is higher. The American Medical Association advised newborns to sleep on their back more than 2 years ago to reduce the chance of sudden infant death.

In the hospital before, Dr. Bao also encountered a case. A three-month-old baby was sent to the intensive care unit critically ill, and it was only after asking about his medical history that he knew that the baby usually slept on his stomach. His parents also specially bought a "baby breathing monitoring mattress", but one day during his sleep, the baby suddenly lost his breathing and heartbeat, and it was a pity.

Although the child's head shape is important, it will be improved even if it is not perfect. As for sleeping on your back, there are other safer ways, instead of sleeping on your stomach. The most important thing is that children can grow up safely and healthily. I believe that after the elders know the potential risks, they dare not take risks.

S9. Grandma said: It's pitiful that the baby will cry when sitting in the car seat. Anyway, it's just a hug. It doesn't matter if you don't sit!

According to the statistics of traffic accidents in the United States, the death rate of children in car accidents without safety seats is eight times that of passengers, so if children's safety seats can be used correctly, the potential casualty rate of children in car accidents can be effectively reduced by more than 7%.

Accidents always happen at that moment, so there is no need to make fun of children's lives. Therefore, please insist on letting the children sit in the safety seat, preferring to let the children cry in the seat, rather than change the adults to cry without tears after the accident. If children cry in the seat, they can be accompanied by adults, and given pacifiers, soothing blankets and favorite toys to relieve discomfort. I believe that children will fall in love with safety seats!

S1. Grandma said: A baby who can crawl at first can learn to stand and walk by taking a walker (crab cart), and can also experience the fun of moving around! ?

In the past, after a child climbed, he was put on a walker, because it was considered as a good "placement place", so that parents could relax, not only holding the child less, but also not worrying that he would climb to other dangerous places.

However, the use of walkers has long been discouraged in the United States and Canada, because children riding in walkers are prone to accidents such as falls or pinch injuries. In addition, studies have shown that walkers may also cause children's O-legs and flat feet, and even scoliosis. Then the height of the walker can't match the child, and it is easy to cause the child to get used to walking on tiptoe in the future.

when we see that our children are put on the walker by our elders, we don't need to take a step to pick them up, and we don't need to break into a furious rage. We should first inform our elders that they will have the above doubts when riding on the walker, and suggest that if they want to let their children ride on the walker, they should not use it for more than 2 ~ 3 minutes at a time.

In addition, be sure to stay with your child and pay attention to whether the surrounding environment is safe. In fact, what we have to do is to provide a safe environment for children, instead of blindly limiting his mobile space with a walker. Because after the child can walk, he can't be surrounded by a walker!

S11. Grandma said: It's dangerous to have a fever, which will burn the child's head! Take medicine as soon as you get sick!

According to statistics, no matter what causes the fever, the body temperature rarely exceeds 41℃. If it exceeds this temperature, the possibility of bacterial meningitis or septicemia is relatively high, so special vigilance is needed. As for the high temperature limit that brain cells can tolerate, it may be necessary to reach 41.7℃ before the protein of cells will deteriorate due to high temperature, causing irreversible damage.

In the past, it was often said that brain damage was caused by encephalitis or meningitis. There are many reasons for the baby's fever. If it is accompanied by poor appetite and mental activity, it is recommended that the pediatrician check it out and find out the reason to prescribe the right medicine.

As for whether a child needs to take medicine immediately when he is ill, it depends on the type and severity of the child's illness. Generally speaking, most of the germs that cause children to get sick are viruses. Most virus infections, except for specific viruses, such as influenza virus or herpes virus, have specific drugs to treat diseases quickly, and the rest of virus infections are mainly drugs to relieve symptoms at present.

Therefore, taking medicine as soon as a child is ill may not necessarily shorten the course of disease. Only through proper rest and nutritional supplement can the child get better quickly. However, when the child's symptoms are serious enough to affect appetite, spirit and sleep, both parents and children don't have to insist on hard support. Taking some medicine can make the child sleep better, and the physical strength can recover quickly, and the caregivers can have time to rest.

This article is the author's opinion of YEATION, and does not represent his position.