A short high-scoring joke

1. When I was a minor, my mother always said that I should learn to be independent and not rely on my parents. Now that you are an adult, can you stop being so independent and find someone to rely on?

2. Bring your girlfriend and family to eat hot pot at night. Mother enthusiastically picked up meat such as beef balls and fish balls for her girlfriend's table and said, take whatever you like and roll it in the pot. As a result, my girlfriend replied strangely: nothing, aunt, you go out!

You must be careful when riding a bike at night. If you see a man and a dog, you must not cross it, because there may be a chain between them.

Four. double；twofold

On the eleventh day, my girlfriend was very obedient. She went to bed early after dinner, but she didn't wake up and didn't respond to the phone call. I'm worried about putting too many sleeping pills ...

Only the weak will cry and beg him not to leave when they break up. We strong people all knelt on the ground and held each other's thighs so that he couldn't move.

6. Friends borrow money for turnover, which is divided into rotation and revolution. When a friend borrows money from you, it is revolving, and he must borrow it within one day, but when he pays back the money, it is revolution.

Seven. The Monkey King asked the pig.

Bajie: Why were you demoted to the mortal world?

Bajie looked at the moon helplessly: The Jade Emperor asked me to finish my daily tasks, but I misunderstood. ..

Every security guard is a philosopher. Every day, they propose to take a philosophy class.

Three ultimate questions: Who are you? Where are you from? Where are you going?

9. I came across a name, Li Yiliang, and then I began to circle a lyric in my mind. "Unity is Li Yiliang! Unity is Li Yiliang!

I was lucky to meet my wife, the love of my life, and the mother of my son. Unfortunately: today they

Three people meet. 1 1. I saw a public service advertisement yesterday, calling for caring for the left-behind elderly. I feel endless sadness-why do they have more hair than me?

12. Go out for a day with others. You will find that after returning home, the remaining power of the mobile phone is directly proportional to the degree of liking this person!

Thirteen. Just now, my buddy said, "Get married quickly. I can be the best man while I still have hair." That's why I heard it's hard to refuse.

Fourteen. Statisticians say that the deaths of bar fights began first.

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5%, which is an obvious data deviation. Those who survive will definitely say that the other side will start first.

15. You ask your sister for her phone number. If you think she gave you a fake phone number, you can change a few numbers and look again. If the sister corrects you, it means that the numbers are true, new skills!

Sixteen years old. One of my classmates made a mistake when choosing a major in college. His mother wants him to study media and his father wants him to study marketing. Finally, he met the requirements of both parents and entered the MLM organization.

17. The vicious gangster grabbed the policeman by the collar and repeatedly stuffed money on him, saying that he would make the policeman happy to death.

Eighteen. Dad was stolen.

After 8000 yuan, I accepted the reality with the help of the police.

19. Today, the snowy road is slippery. One of the grandfathers fell and no one helped him. I shook my head and ran to help him. Unexpectedly, I fell down and kicked him further.

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10. Popularize college English.

Band 4 means that you can skillfully use high-frequency words such as YES. No, okay.