A joke about two people quarreling.

I accidentally dropped my mobile phone, and my wife asked me, "Is it still usable?" ? If not, I'll get a new mobile phone. "Well, my phone is broken. Why do you want to change it?

A young man spent 2000 yuan, of which 1500 yuan bought a mobile phone for the goddess, stayed at a dinner in 500 yuan, opened a room, and rode a battery car to find the goddess. The goddess said, you are a good man, but we are really not suitable. Improvement scheme: A young man, 700 yuan, rented a BMW5 series, and then 300 yuan went to the wholesale market to buy 99 roses, telling the goddess that he liked to go to those romantic snack bars hand in hand, and the maximum consumption was 100 yuan. The goddess opened the house with him that night because of love ... This tells us that the business model is the key to the success or failure of the project, not the cost!

Just having dinner with friends. This is the background. We play games together and take turns talking about the characters in the Water Margin. Everyone talked about Lin Chong and Lu one by one. When it was another buddy's turn, that buddy looked at us with innocent eyes and said, "Does Liu Huan count?" . . "

A few days, the four-year-old son didn't eat well, so he had to coax him, cut paper with stones, and took a bite when he lost it. Soon he finished a bowl of rice happily. . Something happened in the company today. I came home a little late. As soon as I entered the room, my stupid wife handed me the bowl. Honey, please feed me. I really can't eat any more ...

When I was a child, my elder sister quarreled with my second sister, which made my third sister unable to stand shouting. You get out of here, and my second sister replied, you get out of here. My third sister said, not to be outdone, this is my home, and my second sister killed my third sister in one second: This is my home, too, and I came first! You go out ... my tears fall from watching. ...

Those little girls, once their hands and feet are hurt or hurt, or bleed! Just take a photo and send it to Weibo to make room for it ... I can't figure it out. Her period came and she bled a lot. Why not take a picture of the wound and send it out to complain!

Chatting with girls I met on blind dates. Me: My family was poor before, but I was very happy. Every time after school, my father takes me by electric car! She: What about now? Me: Life is good now. My father gave me his electric car and he bought a new one. She ... . .

"Mom, this soup is too salty!" "Nothing, mom has a magic weapon." As she spoke, she sprinkled some white powder into the soup. "I promise it won't be salty for a while." I wondered, "What did you pour into it?" "Desalination medicine!" Me. . .

Me: "The boss got a haircut". The boss looked at me and said, "Eight dollars. Hey, you are a student. " I thought about it, how can I see that I am a student when I am so mature, and I said confidently, "No!" " "The boss smiled and nodded:" Not a student 15 yuan ". . . .

A monk asked me, "Which do you choose, fishing rod or 500 Jin fish?" I said, "I want 500 Jin of fish." The monk shook his head and said with a smile, "The benefactor is superficial, and the fish is gone after eating. This fishing rod can catch a lot of fish. Do you understand this truth? I said, you know how to follow the wool. After selling 500 kilograms of fish, you can buy a lot of fishing rods. " Monk: "Amitabha ... I don't want to talk to you!