Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Yuan Longping's first show at the party was as distressing as ever, and I once admitted that I didn't know Gong Li.
Yuan Longping's first show at the party was as distressing as ever, and I once admitted that I didn't know Gong Li.
Tonight, 202 1 Hunan Satellite TV will start broadcasting in the Spring Festival Evening, and the host lineup is still luxurious (He Jiong, Wang Han, Du Haitao, Shenyang, Irina Kaptelova). Why didn't I see Nana? Because she is pregnant.
The popularity and strength of the guests invited to this party should not be underestimated, including the new generation singer Kun, "Walking CD" Na Ying, "Queen of Sweet Songs", Hans Zhang, etc.
However, the most dazzling and touching thing tonight is our "father of hybrid rice", Mr. Yuan Lao from Yuan Longping. Yuan Lao made his debut at the hybrid rice group party, "My teacher is a bit awesome". At this time, people discovered that Yuan was old and distressing.
At that time, Yuan Lao was a guest on Lu Yu's program and talked about his desire to be an ordinary person, because he was so tired all his life.
Yes, Yuan Lao devoted his life to rice fields in order to support 65.438+0.3 billion Chinese children. Even at the age of 90, I occasionally go to the experimental field to have a look.
In the program, Yuan Lao also mentioned that Gong Li was sitting next to him at the time of an award presentation, looking at himself all the time, but he had no idea who Gong Li was.
Lu Yu, the host, was very surprised and said, "You don't even know who Gong Li is?"
Also joked that "you don't even look at beautiful women!"
Yuan Lao said, "Beauty is still very beautiful, but I didn't know she was so famous. Later I learned that she played red sorghum. "
Netizens commented on this:
"People like Yuan Lao really don't need to know Gong Li."
Some netizens said, "Yuan Lao is the biggest star in China" and "100 Gong Li is not worth a Yuan Longping."
Yuan Lao, who has always been serious, is also very humorous. He said: "On the Internet, I am low-key, and Gong Li is low!" Say that finish Yuan Lao happy like a child!
Indeed, they are two people from completely different worlds. One is Longping and the other is Long Xiong; ; One is low-key, the other is low bear.
Today, I want to introduce this outstanding old man to you.
1930 On September 7th, a child was born who later solved the problem of eating in China and even the whole world.
Up to now, the Union Medical College Hospital still retains Yuan Lao's birth certificate, but the name of the newborn is written in the column-Yuan Xiao. What a lovely name!
Yuan Longping's birth certificate.
Yuan's children like swimming since childhood. Not only do they often go swimming in the river when they are absent from class, but they also take their younger brother with them. As a result, I was inevitably beaten by my father.
By swimming, Yuan Longping made himself an excellent swimmer. 1947, Yuan Longping, senior one, men's 100 meter freestyle champion in Hankou Division; In the same year, he won the runner-up in the men's 100 meter freestyle in Hubei province.
1949, when new China was founded, its primary task was to develop agriculture. So Yuan Longping, who was eager to serve his country, joined the army of studying agriculture and was admitted to Southwest Agricultural College.
In my sophomore year, in order to support the anti-rice aid, the state called on college students to actively join the army. After the medical examination and political examination all passed, Yuan Longping was excited about his blue sky dream.
It wasn't long before Yuan Longping's blue sky dream came to nothing. It is reported from the front that the war has eased, and all college students who have passed the screening but have not yet joined the army need not go to the front again.
Students who are about to join the army take a group photo as a souvenir.
After graduating from Southwest Agricultural College, Yuan Longping entered Hunan Anjiang Agricultural School to teach. He stayed here for 16 years.
The student recalled: "Teacher Yuan is very approachable. After class, he mingled with us. The blackboard is full. He shrank his hand, grabbed his sleeve and wiped it. "
While teaching in an agricultural school, Yuan Longping met his first love and was a beautiful chemistry teacher. The two talked for three years, and they all reached the point of talking about marriage, but the woman went back on her word.
The reason is that I don't want to stay in this poor ravine all my life and finally marry a "decent" university teacher. Now, Yuan Lao has already become a "farmer scientist" admired by the world. I wonder if this chemistry teacher will regret it?
The night before receiving the certificate, the female teacher ran downstairs to the staff dormitory and took a look at the man she once loved deeply. But Yuan Longping was very sad, because his girlfriend was going to marry someone else tomorrow, so she ran out to see a movie in a fit of pique.
In this way, the first love girlfriend waited for several hours in the staff downstairs, while Yuan Longping was depressed in the cinema for half a night, not knowing what movie was showing.
Yuan Longping in college.
The next day, the girl got married. But Yuan Longping is a spoony, waiting for three years. He said:
"I was naive and wanted to wait for her divorce, so maybe we can still be together. Later, she wrote to tell me that she had a baby, so I won't wait any longer. "
Half a century later, they met once, and the female teacher said to Yuan Longping:
"If I had waited for you that night, maybe everything would have been different."
After being lovelorn, depressed Yuan Longping devoted all her energy to the experiment. Colleagues, looking distressed, set about introducing Yuan Longping, an "older leftover man".
As a result, when a colleague brought the girl to Yuan Longping, he was dumbfounded. It turned out to be his own student Deng Zhe.
At that time, the relationship between teachers and students was morally forbidden, but Yuan Lao boldly announced his love regardless of everything.
On one occasion, Yuan Longping washed his face. As a result, he didn't finish washing his face, but all the water leaked. Holding up the washbasin and looking at the light, it turned out that there was a hole in the bottom of the basin.
Deng Zhe felt funny and distressed, thinking that someone had to take care of this workaholic. So, after falling in love for only one month, they got married.
Yuan Longping (second row right) and his wife (second row left)
Don't think that Yuan Longping is just a "plowman". People know how to care about people and play romance. He is simply a romantic warm man.
Yuan Longping will take his lover to the river to swim and enjoy the moon in the middle of the night11; In order to facilitate the lover to wash, the trustee bought the most fashionable gas water heater at that time.
Every time Deng Zhe takes a bath, as long as he can't hear the sound of running water for two or three minutes, Yuan Longping will shout loudly-"Deng Zhe! Deng Zhe! " .
Yuan Longping was worried about her gas poisoning, so she would shout a few words from time to time. Only Deng Zheying can rest assured.
With Deng Zhe as his wife, Yuan Longping can devote herself to rice research.
When he got married, he happened to find a rice plant in the experimental field of the school, which stood out from the crowd and was full of ears. As a result, it is cared for like a newborn baby and carefully accepts the seeds when it matures.
But the next year, the seeds of "big rice" were sown. The tall ones grew into "Yao Ming", the short ones into "Pan Changjiang", the fat ones into "Degang Guo" and the thin ones into "Gong Hanlin".
The first "hybrid rice" experiment failed, and sarcasm and ridicule followed. Many experts bluntly said, "Yuan Longping is fooling around, he knows nothing about genetics".
During that time, Yuan Longping often sat alone on the ridge and smoked silently. He made up his mind to make the hybrid rice experiment successful and not let others see the joke.
For the next two years, Yuan Longping and his team stood in the scorching sun every day, hunched their backs and holding magnifying glasses, looking for "goals" one by one. At the end of the day, I was too tired to straighten my waist and my face was hurt by the ears of rice.
Finally, after observing 6.5438+0.40 million rice ears, they found 6 male sterile rice plants in 654.38+0.964 and 654.38+0.965.
Later, after two years of research day and night, Yuan Longping successfully cultivated "male sterile line" rice in 60 pots.
However, just as Yuan Lao was preparing to roll up his sleeves and do a big job, that special period came. 1967, put in the "bullpen"!
What makes Yuan Lao feel distressed is that all 60 "bourgeois cylinders" have been smashed.
After coming out of the "bullpen", the Hunan Provincial Science and Technology Commission specially sent people to Yuan Longping to send 600 yuan scientific research funds. Yuan Lao was very grateful and vowed to live up to the expectations of the country.
In those years, Yuan Lao took his scientific research team to race against time in order to feed the people. I often bring dry food and water, and lunch will be made in the field.
From 65438 to 0968, Yuan Longping cultivated more than 700 male sterile plants.
In order to take good care of these treasures, Yuan Longping went to the experimental field before dawn, came back after dark, and "grew" in the rice fields every day. His wife Deng Zhe said, "Even the three sons have never seen Lao Yuan so sad."
Seeing the dawn of victory is just around the corner, a man-made destruction has made all Yuan Longping's efforts go down the drain.
Late at night in May that year, a rare rainstorm poured down. Yuan Longping got up quickly and ran to the paddy field in the pouring rain. He carefully examined the seedlings to make sure that they would not be damaged by wind and rain, and then turned back to the dormitory.
The next day, before dawn, he hurried to the experimental field. However, the scene in front of me made Yuan Lao sit on the ground with tears in his eyes!
"All the seedlings were uprooted by' insiders', and even the opportunity to save them was not left to us." Yuan Lao is still very sad to recall.
Yuan Longping said: "This incident delayed my experiment for three years."
What makes Yuan Lao even more chilling is that those who "maliciously pull out seedlings" also plant and ridicule Yuan Longping. They let the wind out and said, "Yuan Longping probably pulled out the seedlings himself for fear that the experiment would not succeed."
Some people even questioned that Yuan was always a liar and was cheating the National Experimental Fund.
Yuan Longping learned a lesson from this painful experience and decided to start all over again. After 67 years' efforts, Nanyou No.2, the first strong and superior combination in China, was finally cultivated. Trial planting for two seasons will increase the yield by 30% compared with conventional rice.
1976 is destined to be an extraordinary year.
Tangshan earthquake, two great men left us one after another, and the whole country was saddened. The only good news is that Yuan Lao's hybrid rice has been planted on a large scale.
Subsequently, hybrid rice spread rapidly. 1998, half of the paddy fields in China were planted with hybrid rice. From then on, China's grain output began to increase 10, and the problem of people's food and clothing was gradually solved.
1998, a firm in Hunan evaluated the value of "Yuan Longping brand" 1000 billion yuan.
When interviewing Yuan Lao, Yang Lan asked, "How did you react when you went home and told your wife?"
Yuan Lao smiled stupidly: "Never said it."
Yuan Lao is such a person. He never pursues fame and fortune, and all his clothes are bought from street stalls. Once he went to the Chinese University of Hong Kong to give a lecture, and the school asked him to wear a tie and a formal suit. So, I bought a 10 dollar tie on the street at random.
Look at some stars, tens of millions of luxury cars instead of walking, hundreds of thousands of Chanel bags, and the century weddings in Huang Xiaoming and Angelababy all cost tens of millions.
Now, although Yuan Lao is 90 years old, he will still go to the fields to have a look.
He said: What's the point of my life without rice research? The word retirement is not in my dictionary!
Last August, everyone stayed at home, blowing air conditioning, eating iced watermelons and watching TV dramas. Yuan Lao, 89, sneaked out of the field again.
Why do you want to sneak in?
Because the assistants were worried about Yuan Lao's health, they wouldn't let him go down to the rice field. After all, it's almost 90 years old, and it's still a hot summer.
Anyone familiar with Yuan Lao knows that he takes a cooling tablet with him, eats a few tablets when he is heatstroke, and rests in the field when he is tired.
Yuan Lao used to ride a motorcycle to and from the experimental field. Later, when he was old and his two wheels were unsafe, his family bought him a car and stopped walking. However, Yuan Lao has exceeded the driving age stipulated by the state and can't get a driver's license.
Therefore, the transportation department gave Yuan Lao a "special" driver's license. Nine characters are printed on the lower left corner of the driver's license: driving off the field, honorary driver's license. And put forward two requirements for Yuan Lao: First, we must learn certain traffic laws and regulations; Second, you can only drive to and from the experimental site.
So some people say that Yuan Lao did something special!
Of course, more people support it. They said, "It is not too much for a scientist who has made great contributions to the country like Yuan Lao to fly back and forth by private jet."
Even though Yuan Lao is so indifferent to fame and fortune and wears cheap clothes, some people accuse him of corrupt life. Said he lived in a mansion and drove a luxury car.
Yuan Lao does have a mansion, which is the reward of the country for his hard work all his life.
Before moving in, the mansion was like this.
After check-in, the mansion became like this-the "mansion" was changed into an office space by Yuan Lao.
Netizens have lamented: Mrs. Yuan is really great. She has worked hard in the rice experimental field all her life and transformed the "mansion" granted by the state into a scientific research place, which makes people respect!
In 20 18, it was in this so-called mansion that Yuan Lao and his research team successfully cultivated seawater to grow salt-tolerant rice. This achievement will increase China's annual grain output by 50 billion kilograms and feed China's 200 million people.
Others say luxury cars, because Yuan Lao took a look at Mercedes-Benz at the auto show in 2008 and was photographed and posted on the Internet, so he was labeled as luxury.
Two years ago, Yuan Lao's mobile phone really didn't work, so he bought two Huawei mobile phones. He said, "We should support domestic brands."
But being slandered by a netizen's malicious language also alarmed the network police.
Many people are dissatisfied with Yuan Lao, and some even made up a joke-"The biggest mistake in my life is to let you eat too much!"
But Yuan Lao said: Retirement does not exist for me.
If the clothes are broken, mend them yourself; When the hair grows, please ask the staff around you to help him cut it; Always carry a cooling tablet on your body, and take a few tablets when you have heatstroke; Make do with having lunch in the wild. ......
This is our Yuan Lao!
If you look at the photos of Yuan Lao carefully, you will find that there are many more spots on his face than ordinary old people, which are all left by years of exposure in the hot sun.
Today, Yuan Lao is 9 1, and the old man who spent his whole life in rice fields is getting weaker and weaker.
Now go out and finally accept being pushed away.
Whenever I see this photo, I can't help crying. .....
So, please shut up those sprayers, okay?
Finally, I propose: Don't waste every grain of rice, so as to be worthy of Grandpa Yuan Longping's hard work!
I wish Yuan Laofu a long life in the southeast!
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