A collection of jokes

The most classic wording of No.65438 +0

Send you a gift with the heaviest amount of feces since there was feces. Please eat enough. If you feel that the amount of feces is not enough, please help yourself!

No.2 scarlet fever spreads like this.

"Doctor, my son has scarlet fever!" "oh? I went there to isolate him, but he kissed the maid. " "Then she will be quarantined, too." "But I kissed her again!" "That's not easy. You also have to be quarantined. " "But I kissed my wife again." "What? Then I am also infected. "

Third place registration

A man opens an account in a bank and entrusts a bank clerk to fill out a form for him: "What's your name?" "Feifei Ferrero, Bibi petrovich, Papa Parik." "Do you stutter?" "No, my father stutters. The official who registered my birth is an idiot! "

The fourth graduate and farmer

A young agricultural college graduate said to a farmer, "Your planting method is really old-fashioned! I would be surprised if you could harvest 10 pounds of apples from that tree! " "It's like this." The farmer replied, "This is a pear tree."

The fifth reason

Judge: "Why did you hit your wife with a chair?" Defendant: "Because I can't lift the table."

Sixth Australian flea

There is a Scotsman who travels to Australia. When I passed a farmhouse, I saw a cow in the fence and asked the farmer, "What's in the fence?" "That's a cow." The Scotsman said, "There must be a nobody like you in our country. Oh, no, it's five times as big as this cow. " As he spoke, he pointed to a kangaroo and said, "What's that guy?" "This is just a flea.

No.7 dull pig

A group of animals want to cross the river, but there is only one boat, so they agree that each animal must tell a joke. If an animal doesn't laugh, he throws the joker into the river. So, the monkey began to talk first. When it finished, all the animals laughed, except the pig. They had to throw the monkey into the river. The second joke was told by the rabbit, but only the pig didn't laugh after he finished. They threw the rabbit into the river again. After the third turtle finished speaking, all the animals didn't laugh, only the pig laughed. Other animals were very strange, so they asked him what he was laughing at. The pig replied, "The monkey joke is so funny!" "