Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Complete collection of English humorous jokes with translation?
Complete collection of English humorous jokes with translation?
Jokes can reflect a nation’s value system and its positive and negative attitudes towards the world around it. Below are the English humorous jokes with translations I brought, welcome to read!
Selection of English humorous jokes with translations
***一***
His score was only two more than the correct answer
Jack Hawkins was the football coach at an American college, and he was always trying to find good players, but they weren't always *** art enough to be accepted by the college. One day the coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that the student be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well," the dean said after some persuasion, "I'd better ask him a few questions first." Then he turned to the student and asked him some very easy questions, but the student didn't know any of the answers. At last the dean said, "Well, what's five times seven?" The student thought for a long time and then answered, "Thirty-six." The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, but the coach said earnestly, "Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two."
Jack Hawkins is a football coach at an American college who is trying his best to find good players. But good players are not academically good and the hospital is unwilling to admit them. One day, the coach took an outstanding young player to see the dean, hoping that the hospital would allow him to enter the school without taking an exam. After some persuasion, the dean said: "Then I'd better ask him a few questions first." Then he turned to the students and asked a few very simple questions. But the student couldn't answer any questions. Finally the dean said: "So, what is five times seven?" The student thought for a long time, and then replied: "Thirty-six." The dean spread his hands and looked at the coach with disappointment. But the coach said seriously, "Oh, admit him, sir. His answer is only two more than the correct answer."
”
***二***
Basic Principles
One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau was known of his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to one freshman class, he said, "Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don't mind if you look at your watches during class. I do, however, object to your pounding them on the desk to make sure they're still running."
There was a teacher at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau who I liked very much, and he was famous for his quirky sense of humor. Explaining his basic principles to a freshman class, he said: "I know my lectures can often be dull and boring, so I don't mind if you look at your watch during class. But I firmly object to you banging your watches on the desk to see if they are still running. ”
Reading English humorous jokes with translation
***一***
A Life for a Life
With “fate” "Death"
The English author, Richard Savage, was once living in London in great poverty. In order to earn a little money he had written the story of his life, but not many copies of the bookhad been sold in the shops, and Savage was living from hand to mouth. As a result of his lack of food he became very ill, but after a time, owing to the skill of the doctor who had looked after him, hegot well again.
British writer Richard Savage lived a life of poverty in London. In order to make a little money, he wrote a story about his life. But the book did not sell many copies in bookstores, Savage said. Qi lived a precarious life. Due to lack of food, he became very ill, but thanks to the skill of the doctor who treated him, he recovered.
After a week or two the doctors sent a bill to Savage for his visits, but poor Savage hadn'tanymoney and couldn't pay it. The doctor waited for another month and sent the bill again. Butstill no money came. After several weeks he sent it to him again asking for his money. In the end he came to Savage's house and asked him for payment, saying to Savage, "You know you owe your life to me and I expected some gratitude from you."
After a week or two, the doctor sent Savage a bill asking for medical expenses, but the poor Savage had no money to pay. The doctor waited a month and sent another bill, but still had not received any money back. A few weeks later, he sent another bill asking for money. Finally, the doctor himself came to Savage's home and said to him: "You understand, you owe me your life, and I hope you will repay me."
"I agree," said Savage , "that I owe my life to you, and toprove to you that I am not ungrateful for your work I will give my life to you."
"Yes," Savage said, "I owe Your life, in order to prove to you that I am not unrewarding for your diagnosis and treatment, I will give you my life."
With these words he handed to him two volumes entitled, The life of Richard Savage. .
With these words, Savage handed the doctor two volumes called "The Life of Richard Savage."
***二***
Difference
"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles. "When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."
"Graduate classes and undergraduates "It's easy to tell the difference between students," said the teacher who taught our graduate engineering class at California State University, Los Angeles. "I said 'Good afternoon,' and the undergraduates said 'Good afternoon.' The graduate students wrote down what I said in their notebooks.
”
Learning English humorous jokes with translation
***一***
Plagiarism
A friend of mine who teaches European history at Washington University in St. Louis tell about the time he spotted a plagiarized term paper. He summoned the student to his office. "This isn'tyour work." he said. "Someone typed it for you straight out of the encyclopedia. " You cann'tprove that!" the student sputtered. My friend amiled and show him the paper. Circled in redwas: "Also see article on muni *** ."
I have a friend in Washington, St. Louis Teaching European history in college, he said he once discovered a plagiarized term paper. He called the student to the office. "You didn't write this," he said. "Someone printed it out for you intact from the encyclopedia." "You have no evidence." The student said angrily. My friend laughed and showed him the paper. Circled in red pen is: "Also see the article on Communism."
***二***
Get Ready!
A story around campus has it a student once sent a telegram to his parents reading: "Mom - flunked all courses. Kicked out of school. Prepare Pop." Two days later he received a response: "Pop prepared. Prepare yourself. "
There is a story circulating on campus: a student once sent a telegram to his parents, which read: "Mom - I failed all my homework and was expelled from school. Let Dad prepare. ." Two days later, he received a call back: "Dad is ready. Just get ready!"
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