Boring Who can tell some funny jokes or brain teasers? Be funny.

1, in the fourth grade of primary school, all students save change and donate it to the disaster area.

Once the teacher asked us how much money we had saved in class. Xiao Ming said; I saved five yuan. Xiao Liang said, I saved ten yuan.

Finally it's my turn, I said, I'm still 99 and 100 short!

Student: "Who is happier, a millionaire or a poor man with seven children?"

Teacher: "A poor man with seven children."

Student: "Why?"

Teacher: "Because he doesn't want more."

Xiaoming said to the teacher while crying, "I hate school, but I will stay at school until I am sixteen."

The teacher replied, "I know how you feel." But I must stay at school until I am sixty. "

4. The teacher assigned homework and gave the following words: "Count, Live, Red, Hand, Report"

A doctor's child wrote on his homework: "registration, hospitalization, red envelopes, surgery, reimbursement."

1, a female classmate looks darker and her boyfriend is a little too white. One day, the students in the dormitory said, "You are not suitable, you will have zebras ..."

2. The adjustment of departments in a university was successfully completed, and all departments, regardless of size, were listed as "colleges". At the summary meeting, the principal made a generous statement: "From now on, there will be no department in our school."

3. The female English teacher smiled and asked the students, "When I said' I am beautiful', what tense was this?" The students said in unison, "past tense, teacher."

When he was in middle school, he was fascinated by the legendary swordsman in an English class. Suddenly, he listened to the English teacher talking about "eight tenses". He quickly stood up and corrected: "Teacher, there are not so many teachers, only three. Did you count Young in? "

One day when I entered the classroom, a boy and a girl got into a fight. The teacher asked him why he bullied that girl He said, "She caught a mosquito and put it on my arm to bite me!" "

On June and June 1 day, someone attended class and had breakfast as usual. After chatting for a few minutes, the teacher finally stopped and said, "bring breakfast to the classroom, but don't eat it in class." Forget it, today is Children's Day, forgive you! "

7. A science student cursed: "You are simply the solution set of X+2 > 4!" It took the scolded person a long time to realize that the answer was "two to positive infinity".

1, student dormitory, so-and-so dormitory, after lights out. There is a man who likes singing and has a drake voice, which makes the gods cry! But I am proud of it!

Today, I sang in bed again, but before I knew it, the dean checked the dormitory, so much for it!

The gentle and lovely director stood outside the door and said, "Look at this. I don't know how to adjust it! " "

2. A philosophy professor is very famous. I often listen to his classes, and some students ask him about his life experience. Why can he abandon social prejudice and choose philosophy as his lifelong career?

The professor replied, "Because when I was in college, the girls in the philosophy department were the most beautiful, so I transferred to the philosophy department."

3. One-day biology class! The grumpy teacher is saying: castrated male dogs are gentle and lose interest in the opposite sex.

Suddenly he found a student sleeping! Great anger!

But for the sake of his own image, he still held back. He woke up his classmates and said softly, XX, do you know what I just said?

The classmate stood up and said strangely, teacher! Why are you so gentle today?

Our school used to be called so-and-so Textile Institute. The campus is relatively small and the accommodation conditions are not so good.

After a boy came in, his father took him for a quiet walk in the school. They were probably scared by poor schools and decided to go back and rebuild.

However, just when the students were rebuilt, our school was renamed, from a textile college to a university. When students volunteered, they didn't make a good inquiry and filled in a university directly.

As a result, on the day of registration, his father took him to school for a walk again ... Father and son cried bitterly.

A riddle to be solved

1. Q: Blue knife and blue gun.

A: A sword is not as good as a gun (the sword is blue).

Q: The man in this gold dress.

A: One Ming (name) surprised (gold) people.

Q: The number "3" did a somersault on the road, and then another somersault.

A: Three transgressions twice.

Q: A dog stopped barking when it crossed the wooden bridge. Why?

A: I can't forget (Wang) after reading (Mu).

5. Q: The eleventh book

A: Unbelievable (book 1 1)

6. Q: Cattle, pigs, dogs and sheep race. After crossing the finish line, the cows, pigs and dogs were panting, but only the sheep didn't breathe. Why?

Be proud (the sheep is not breathing)

7. Q: The calendar was stung by a bee.

A: The wind (bees) and the sun (calendars).

8. Here comes a bear.

Come prepared (bear comes)

9. Q: A sheep is called an eagle.

Yang (sheep) serves (telephone) Yin (eagle) fouls (hello)

10. Q: What kind of bat doesn't have to rest?

A: Not slovenly (never stop bats)

1 1. Q: The mobile phone can't be transferred to the toilet. Why?

A: It's now or never.

12. Q: A group of people smashed guns with eggs.

Bullets (eggs) are raining in the forest.

13. Q: Eat with chopsticks.

The number of people who eat (chopsticks) is (to)

14. Q: There are ten sheep, and nine have been squatting in the pigsty.

A: cadence (one sheep squats wrong)

15. q: oh, my god, this is the only one in the whole area who hasn't installed a phone yet.

A: Perfect (God, no phone)

16. Q: Why did the hat turn over when it was dirty?

A: Zhang Guan Dai Li (in the stolen crown)

17. Q: Xiao Yu's mother said Xiao Yu's father was impotent.

A: I can't stop (for Dad).

18. Q: The magic soap made from pig liver and bear bile.

Answer: Be honest with each other (soap)

19. q: cows are called calves when they are young. What should rabbits and turtles be called when they were young?

Son of a bitch turtle

20. Q: What are the main ingredients of birth control pills?

A: Antibiotics.

2 1. Q: Why didn't the fireworks hit the stars?

A: Because the stars will "flash"

22. Q: What do you call a woman who has been divorced many times?

A: All previous jobs (public jobs) have been abandoned.

23. Q: Xiao Bai looks like his brother. Why?

A: Because the truth (image) came out.

24. Q: Who will be eliminated when wolves, tigers and lions play games?

Eliminate wolves (Momotaro)

25. Who is the most compassionate cartoon character in the world?

A: Robot cat.

Why: Because he always gives people round hands!

26. Who is the darkest cartoon character in the world?

A: It's still a robot cat!

Why: Because he can't see his fingers. ...

27. Q: What do African cannibals eat?

A: people!

Q: Then one day, the chief fell ill and the doctor told him to be a vegetarian. What did he eat?

A: Eat vegetables!

29. Q: What happens when a fat man falls from the 12 building?

fat person

30. Q: Who will help you eat when you are full?

Answer: dragonfly, because dragonfly is in the sky.

3 1. Q: A triangle tree was sent to the North Pole for planting. What will it be called when it grows up?

Answer: trigonometric function (cold tree)! Stupid!

32. Q: What is the surname of Qu Yuan's wife?

My surname is Chen, because I am human.

33. Q: What line do monkeys hate most?

Answer: Parallel lines, because they don't intersect (bananas).

34. Q: Who is the most embarrassing historical figure?

A: Su Wu. Because Su Wu is herding sheep by the North Sea!

Q: A rabbit races with a fast tortoise. Guess who won?

A: Rabbit!

Q: Wrong! It's a turtle. As mentioned earlier, it's a fast turtle. It runs fast!

Q: The rabbit doesn't want to compete with a turtle wearing sunglasses. Who will win this time?

Um ... Rabbit. ...

Q: Wrong! That turtle took off her sunglasses, yeah! It's that fast turtle again!

36. Q: Two people fell into the trap. Dead is dead. What's the name of the living person?

A: Call for help!

37. Question: What are cloth and paper afraid of?

A: cloth is afraid of 10 thousand, paper is afraid of one thousand.

Reason: not (cloth) afraid of 10 thousand, just (paper) afraid of one thousand.

Q: The ants went to the desert. Why didn't he leave footprints on the beach, but only a line?

Because it rides a bike!

Q: The ants came home from the desert. He didn't inform anyone, but his family knew he was back! Why ah!

See his bike parked downstairs. ...

Q: When will Taiwan Province Province be reunified?

A: When buying instant noodles. ...

Once upon a time, there was a white cat and a black cat. One day, the white cat fell into the water. The black cat saved it. What did the white cat say to the black cat? ...

Q: What is this sentence?

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