A tearful humorous joke.

The real friends around you have little to do with your beauty or ugliness, or whether you have money or not. Below, I will collect and sort out the humorous jokes that make you laugh and cry. Let's learn humor and collect popularity!

Humorous jokes with tears (1)

1) A picture resembling a chest caused a heated discussion in Weibo:? Sagging? ,? A little expansion? ,? Asymmetry, small left and big right? ,? The spacing is too large? ,? This is the ass, right?

Don't wash it, but for the mud, this broken car would have fallen apart a long time ago.

3) After graduating from college, one day I saw a classmate I hadn't contacted for a long time coming across the river, so I laughed at him. Small sample, all mixed up like this! ? As a result, he quarreled with me and I was angry. Shit, bring it on if you dare! ? He said:? Who's afraid of who? Come here if you dare! ?

4) A rock singer once sang: Looking for a girlfriend or getting a dog? It's time for canaries to say this today: find a boyfriend and a dog at the same time.

5) The family asked the 6-year-old son about his ideal, and the son said he wanted to be a doctor. Grandma said that doctors are good and have high social status. Grandma said the treatment was good, and Grandpa said there were other incomes besides salary! Grandpa said that it is more important to find someone in the future. After listening to this, I asked my son with satisfaction why he wanted to be a doctor. He said:? Didn't you say that doctors can treat diseases?

6) In ancient times, when a child named Sima Guang was playing in the garden, a child accidentally fell into a jar full of water. The children panicked, and Sima Guang calmly raised a stone and threw it at the jar. The jar was broken, water flowed out and the child was saved. Everyone praised Sima Guang. The next day, they went to the river to play. Sima Guang accidentally fell into the river. The children calmly picked up stones from the ground and threw them into the river. Sima Guang, nine years old!

7) A city man went to visit relatives in the countryside and got lost. I saw an old man by the roadside. Just roll down the car door glass and shout loudly: grandpa, how to get to the village? The old man gave him a look. I don't have time to tell you about my cow tractor. I have to go back and take care of it. ? The city people asked curiously:? Why don't cows get off when they don't have calves? The old man touched his head? By the way, I forgot that animals don't get off.

8) "Little lovers have sex all night. After that, the husband went to the bathroom to clean and wipe his wife carefully. What took you so long? Husband said:? The sniper rifle is used up, so it must be maintained. My brother's name is Liu Shun? "

9) Landlord of the forum: Haha, is the cybersquatting successful? Kung fu panda? This ID, do you think it's cool for me to use this name in the future? Forum sofa: Your father is a duck!

10) My best friend was diagnosed as infertile and committed suicide last night. I went to see his widow today. I gave her a hug, comforted her and cried with her. ? Him? Not even a suicide note. His wife is crying. ? He wanted to write, but he couldn't write in the end. ? I am also very sad to answer. ? Why? She sobbed. ? Because there is no core in his pencil.

1 1) Wear other people's shoes and take other people's roads, so that others can neither find their shoes nor find their way.

12) The difference between life and existence is heaven and earth. How many people are alive and how many people are alive? Are you alive or alive?

13) A good woman is a school for men. A good woman hopes that this good student will never graduate.

14) ? As a married man, you always grin at me. Aren't you ashamed? I yelled at my wife.

15) A patient asked the doctor that his hands and feet were cold. Patient:? When my hands and feet are cold, I will hold my wife, so that I will get hot and feel warm? . ? Doctor:? Is this a method worth trying? That? When is convenient for your wife?

Humorous jokes with tears (2)

I said, how can I thank you for your kindness? Let me marry you! He said, "How can I bite the hand that feeds me?

2. A: Last year, the sales volume of fragrant and fluttering milk tea exceeded 700 million cups, circling the earth three times. This year, it sold more than 654.38+. Why are advertisements still circling the earth three times?

Peeing is the only pleasure in my daily life. You won't ask me why I am addicted to beer, will you?

Four, two people discuss whether the story of Mulan is true or not. One person said: it must be fake. If you eat and drink Lazar every day, how could you not know it? ! Another man: Shit! If you were the one who slept with her every day, would you say it?

Verb (abbreviation for verb) "Do you really like me that much? Woman: hmm ... the boy took a deep breath of his cigarette and looked at the girl affectionately: I don't want to go back to the dormitory today. Do you have an ID card? Woman: Yes ... But, ok ... The boy took the ID card and asked her gently: Do you know which Internet cafe is cheaper here? ......"

6. When I got home, I saw my girlfriend curled up on the sofa. You can see her graceful figure and hear her breathing through her pajamas. I approached her. Close to her chest. Listen carefully to her breathing. I went back to my room silently. Turn on the computer. Gave the seller a bad review: Shit, I just bought it and missed it.

M-girls is discussing what to do in the afterlife. A said: to make flowers, everyone kiss me. B said: playing mahjong, everyone touches me. C said: make ice cream and everyone licks me. D said: to be an ambulance, everyone will get on me from behind. Can I still scream?

Eight, sometimes, except lies are true, everything else is false!

9. people who just got their driver's license like to put them on new cars? Beginners on the road? Labels let others know their driving ability at a glance. Yesterday, I saw a guy's car was super awesome and posted it:? The driver's license is bought. It's up to you.

I told my friends that I am not the sun at eight or nine o'clock in the morning, but the moon at three or four o'clock in the morning. My friend told me that with your figure, you should be the moon on August 15th. ...

According to the internet, everything in the world can be summarized in two sentences: it's none of your business, and it's none of my business. I think it's classic. When I get back, I ask my wife to help me with my experiment! And she said:? I'm pregnant? Me:? Shut you down. . . Shut me up. . . Damn it, you are so cruel! ! ! ?

Twelve, a good girlfriend can save 20G space for your computer; A good boyfriend can save you 200 Fu Nan batteries.

13. Do you still remember the love on the lawn and in the shade of a university or park? Now the lawn has been replaced by imported turf and there are fewer and fewer trees.

Fourteen, the patient said to the psychologist:? I always thought I was a bird? Doctor:? Oh, that's serious. When did it start? Patient:? Since I was a bird. ....

Fifteen,? Hello, I'm White Snake! I am Xiaoqing! We are S.H.E! ?

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