The paragraph of WeChat chatting with my sister is very funny.

Do you often chat with your sister on WeChat? The following is a funny paragraph about chatting with my sister on WeChat, which is for reference only. Welcome to read it!

We talked about a girl on WeChat, but never told her age.

We talked about a girl on WeChat, never told her age, and finally promised to meet her at the weekend. We booked a KTV box and waited for her. It was only 16 when we arrived, but we still came with a schoolbag after making up lessons, so we couldn't help her finish her geometry homework at KTV!

There was a young man in front of the car who jumped backwards and fell to the ground, looking at me with a very painful expression. Me:? I didn't bump into you. How can you mistake people at a young age? Young man:? Who can prove that you have a driving recorder? My heart is tight, I'm not pretending. ? Regret it? Then the young man took out a box from his bag: Big brother, install one. I'll give you a discount. ?

at 1: 3 the night before yesterday, a phone call suddenly came: Is it Wang Gang? I said no. At 11: 36, again: Wang Gang is asleep? I said: You have the wrong number! At 12: 21, the phone rang again: What is Wang Gang doing? I got angry in a daze: my name is Ma! Not Wang Gang! Go away! I woke up at four o'clock this morning and couldn't sleep. I remembered that phone call, so I dialed it. The opposite side said in a daze, Who is it? what's up I said coldly: nothing, just want to ask if you have found Wang Gang!

Today, I went out to do business, and there was a traffic jam during the rush hour. So I borrowed 2B's roommate's electric car. As a result, I ran out of power after riding halfway on the road, so I pushed it over and pushed it back after finishing the work. I was exhausted. Come back and ask 2B roommate:? Don't you know your car is dead? 2B Answer:? I know, I'm afraid you won't believe me when I say there is no electricity, and I'm stingy, so

I went to a big company for an interview yesterday, and the interviewer spoke just before I entered the office.

　? Now you say a word so that I can remember you right away. ?

　? I met you in the hotel, and you hugged the assistant who just brought me in. ?

　? Ok! You're accepted! ?

I'm a poor boy, and she's a rich girl, a typical white woman. A public welfare activity, we know each other and have mutual affection. But her parents don't agree anyway. We have gone through twists and turns and tests, and we have been on and off many times like most couples, and now we have finally entered the marriage hall. At that moment, she was moved to tears, and I cried, and then I woke up.

Today, the weather is fine. My wife and I went to the amusement park to play roller coaster and queued for a long time. When it was our turn, my wife said that she wanted to go to the toilet. I said that if you waited so long, you would have to queue up again, and the result was hard! When I got to the most exciting place, I only heard the customers riding the roller coaster together, and saw loudly that it was raining!

My female colleague handfuls of TT to my brother, and said shyly,

A sister just took off her driver's license and bought a car. When she got off work, she had to let me get on the bus and drop me off at home. After N times of fire fighting, she finally got on the road smoothly. When she was about to arrive at my home, her sister told me, Sister, I will drive slowly when I get to your home, so you can just jump off. I haven't reacted yet, this idiot. Lying in the trough, this car is sitting.

Today, a woman dressed as a nun was selling a small pendant with a picture of a bodhisattva at the station, and kept talking about Buddhism and Taoism to ensure peace. . . A little annoyed, I asked how much it cost, and bought it to let her go, but she said: Donor, we monks don't talk about money, talk about fate! ? I'm a little puzzled: What fate is 2 yuan! ?

A monk asked a Sichuanese, "Which do you choose, a fishing rod or a basket of fish?" The Sichuanese said, "I want a basket of fish." The monk shook his head and smiled. The benefactor is superficial. It is better to teach people to fish than to teach them to fish. Do you understand this truth? The fish is gone after you eat it. You can catch a lot of fish with a fishing rod and eat it for a lifetime! The Sichuanese said, "I want a basket of fish and sell it. I can buy some fishing rods and a pair of mahjong. Then rent the fishing rod to others, collect the rent, and then invite them to play mahjong while fishing. Mahjong can pump money? "Monk:" Amitabha? I don't want to talk to you Sichuanese. .

I really didn't want to go shopping with my girlfriend, so I threw ten dollars at the roadside stall behind me and bought a fake gold chain. I quickly walked up to my girlfriend and held the chain in my hand to show a little bit. I whispered that I had to pick it up quickly, and my girlfriend and I hurried home. . .

I went out on business and asked a female colleague to collect the courier. When I came back, my female colleague handed me TT and said shyly: Damn, I just want to see what kind of umbrella you bought. I didn't expect to take a look at the package. The package said: sunshade, shop girl, you are so fucking talented!

When I go to a restaurant with my friends, I will spend 22 yuan on one meal. Tell the boss? 2 less, can I give it to 2?

boss? Small business, can't afford to grind, or so, give you a 1% discount! ?

we agreed, and then, after the conversion, the boss was silent!

The son who goes to primary school always asks questions, regardless of time and place: Dad, why do the hands in the clock go their separate ways? Father is LOL as a bee:? Because they are not on good terms. ? The child asked:? Then why do they all get together again from 1 to 12 o'clock? The father replied disdainfully:? You are stupid. It's noon, and they're going to have dinner together! ?

Last night, when I was eating in a restaurant, I saw the waitress's sister playing WeChat. I silently picked up the phone and shook it. When I looked at the photo, it really shook the waitress's sister. I sent WeChat to the waitress's sister and said: Hi! Miss, do you have a minute? The waitress sister immediately returned: Yes, handsome boy! I am bored and idle now! I replied: Bring the spoon as soon as you have time. I've been waiting for almost an hour. ?

A girl asks Xiao Ming what kind of girl she likes, and I'll introduce one to you! Xiao Ming said: big waves and long hair! The girl asked, is that the only requirement? Xiao Ming said, no, these are three requirements! ! ! !

the teacher asked? Rich, willful? What's the bottom line? Xiao Ming answered:? No money, resigned? . The teacher is speechless! ? Describe the married life of modern men in one sentence! ? Xiaoming:? Married an ancestor and gave birth to a father! ? The teacher asked again:? Why did ancient women bind their feet? Xiaoming shouted:? Afraid of them shopping? . The teacher then asked:? Then why not wrap it now? Xiao Ming continued to answer:? Now with Alipay, foot-binding is useless. ? Teacher:? Come on, come on? Give a lecture, little brat!

Last night, the boss took us to eat shabu shabu shabu, where the clear soup pot was 38 yuan and the spicy pot was 88 yuan, so we asked for a clear soup pot. Can eat for a while, a few people feel numb! The boss said? Eat quickly, maybe it's wrong. It's an advantage today. ? Later, the boss fainted, and it took a long time to recover. Others were too numb to stand it, so they asked the waiter if it was wrong. Too numb to eat. The waiter checked it and said, I'm really sorry, this pot leaks electricity.

I left my watch in the class, but when I came to pick it up after class, I found it missing. The class teacher told us earnestly: Honesty is the basic principle of being a man. As a high school student, aren't you ashamed that no one cares about him? He said that direct search would have a bad influence on students' reputation, and then he said, well, in that case, I'll solve this problem in a decent way. Now turn off the lights for five minutes, and everyone will walk past the podium one by one. That man will put his watch in my bag and forget it. Five minutes later, the class teacher opened the bag. Not only was there no watch, but the money in it was gone?

I was not allowed to enter the school examination room because I was three minutes late. I was so disappointed. . . What is going on between people? Have no feelings at all? You only saw that I was late, but you didn't know that even the night before the college entrance examination, I was still helping my mother push tofu flowers. I was the only hope in my family. Why are you so cruel? Security guard:? Isn't it just that you are not allowed to go in and sell stinky tofu? Is it so sensational?

after XXOO, I asked him, which is more beautiful, my girlfriend or me

1. After xxoo with my boyfriend, I asked him, which is more beautiful, my girlfriend or me? Of course it's you. Your boudoir is a little droopy and dry. How do you know that? Tell me honestly. Shit, she's my wife. How could I not know that? Look at my memory. ...

2. A few days ago, my friend introduced me to a sister, saying that the other person was very rich, and she was a lady of a wealthy family. I was an honest man, and it would be good for me if she had money or not. Later, I learned that a wealthy family was a bath center.

3. After the college entrance examination, let's popularize what listening is. Listening is a way to test the true skill of the ear. The specific operations are: condense qi to refresh yourself, get used to your ears, and try to listen to others' handwriting. Write three times for A, write once for C, write twice for B and D, and write for a short time for D.

4. Before my friend's blind date, I told him that if my sister didn't look good, send me a message after watching the movie, and I'll call you again, so that you can have an excuse to retreat. As a result, after watching the movie, my sister said that she had an appointment with someone to go shopping with her sister, which was not written in the script.

5. When I was in college, I couldn't stand the feeling that my boyfriend was cheating, so I asked my roommate to introduce me to a boyfriend. The boy in the department of physics and electricity turned around and left me because it was too beautiful and unsafe. The explanation of my ex-boyfriend's cheating was: instead of waiting for me to be chased away and he was injured, he might as well let go first. Am I really beautiful in da ji ~

6. My son asked his father for a mobile phone to play with, but he didn't give it to me. Then, my son said I wouldn't call you dad if you didn't give it to me! Dad said not to scream! A few seconds later, Xiong Haizi said,? Brother, give me your mobile phone to play. ?

7. Today, I had a drink at a classmate's party and drove my classmates home. I saw a traffic policeman checking drunk driving ahead and stopped the car silently. The policeman uncle came over and said, Why don't you leave? I said silently:? Not to check the mark. Your fucking electric car is not fun! ?

8. My colleague made an appointment for a bubble yesterday and returned to the company this morning. I asked him, buddy, how do you feel? Colleague: Everything else is fine, but it's too dark. Me: No, I looked quite white yesterday! Colleague: You don't know shit! The black in front of you is not black. What do you mean by white? Me: Why did you sing it?

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