Humorous and Hilarious Jokes_A Collection of Funny Jokes and Jokes

Interesting jokes are more popular and can immediately catch our attention and attract our attention. Below are the fun and hilarious jokes I compiled for you, I hope you like them.

Excerpts of humorous and hilarious jokes

1. A group of old men and women were attending a college for the elderly. One day they all forgot to do their homework. The principal heard about this and was furious, giving them a collective playground punishment. He stood up and brought a Taoist priest, who danced with swords, drew talismans, chanted mantras, and burned paper for a while. The old people were confused and asked: What are you doing? The principal said seriously: What are you doing? Parents!

2. If you feel bored at night, then turn off the lights, turn on the computer, and play a ghost movie. Then you will feel: There are people in the kitchen! There are people in the toilet! There are people under the bed! There are people everywhere! Old Is it so lively?

3. A maintenance man came to repair the TV, and there was only one very sexy woman at home. The maintenance man kept looking at the woman while repairing the TV. After the repair was completed, the woman said to the maintenance man: "I have an embarrassing request. Can you agree to it?" The maintenance man felt something vaguely and kept saying: "Yes." ?The woman continued: ?The thing is like this, my husband is very weak, and some things cannot be pointed out to him. See, you are a man and I am a woman. In fact, I noticed your strong body as soon as you came in. The man's saliva almost flowed out, and he couldn't wait to say: "Then let's start!" You are so happy! "The woman is happy. Answer: My new refrigerator is at the door, so please help me move it in! ?

4. My friend said that his wife was very lazy. I asked what was wrong, and he said that his wife He lives on the third floor. Every time his wife buys something online, she writes in the note: "Pregnant woman, with limited mobility, please deliver to your door!" A few days ago, the courier delivery guy finally couldn't bear it anymore and went downstairs. Shouted: ?Three years! I have tolerated you for three years! Are you pregnant with Nezha?

5. The Spanish like beef balls, and every time a bullfight is over, they will eat the defeated bull. Cut off the testicles and eat them. One day, a Spaniard came to the restaurant and ordered beef balls. The restaurant waiter said: "You pay the deposit and it will be given to you tomorrow." The next day, the man came to get the beef balls and found that the balls were very small, so he asked why. The waiter replied: Sir, not every time the bullfight is lost, today the matador lost.

6. After the second child was fully liberalized, a student made a mistake in school, and the teacher asked him to The parents called, but the student said that the parents were not at home, could his uncle do it? The teacher said yes. The next day, he ran to school with his brother-in-law who had just turned one year old on his back?

7. Life is not easy, don’t laugh at others. Every family has scriptures that are difficult to recite, and everyone has songs that are difficult to sing. No matter how beautiful a person is, there is still bitterness behind him; no matter how happy a person is, there is helplessness and difficulty in his heart. . . No one’s life is easy. Smiling at others means laughing at yourself. Respecting others means respecting yourself. The poorest people are just begging for food, and those who don't die will always come forward. Whose life is perfect, whose life is not miserable, who can guarantee that they will always be happy in life. . . A love begins with a heartbeat and is filled with joy without words; a love ends with a cold heart and is filled with speechlessness. Love can watch but not expect, love can be tolerant but not indulgent. Only when the soul is singing can we continue; only when the mind is not distracted can it last long.

8. Before Malaysia Airlines was shot down, Xiao Ming was masturbating in a village in Ukraine. When the police saw it, they came over and asked Xiao Ming: "What are you doing here?" Xiao Ming hesitated. Answer:?Me. . . I'm masturbating!

9. A new girl came to the class. She introduced herself: I may not be the smartest, I may not be the most beautiful, I may not be the best. , I may not be the most humorous. ?The classmates in the class praised her humility. After reading her name after class, they found out that her name was Wei Bihui.

10. A group of old men and women were attending a senior college. One day they all forgot to do their homework. The principal was furious when he heard about it and made them stand in the playground together. At the same time, he also brought a Taoist priest. There was a period of dancing with swords, drawing talismans, chanting mantras and burning paper. The old people were confused and asked: What are you doing? The principal said seriously: What are you doing? Parents please!

11. If you feel bored at night, So, turn off the lights, turn on the computer, and play a ghost movie, and then you will feel: There are people in the kitchen! There are people in the toilet! There are people under the bed! There are people everywhere! How busy is it?

12. As soon as my sister got home, she started complaining about her brother-in-law again. I sneered and said: He is so bad, you can just go get a divorce! My sister looked at me strangely: There were so many boys chasing me back then, if you hadn’t treated me every day Saying how good he is, how can I marry him? Now you ask me to divorce him, what do you mean? I roared: He is a bad person. Back then, he said that if I help him catch you, he will help me catch you. His sister, is his sister married now?

13. People who live in jokes: men are hungry, women are lonely, young women look forward to gangsters; scheming bitches, stupid and strong, are cuckolded and beg for praise; old men Abbot, Qian girl, cucumber and radish accompanied by Shuangshuang; old driver, racing king, who turns yellow at the slightest disagreement.

14. My best friend’s QQ status: “I’m not used to getting married. When I opened my eyes in the morning, I found a man lying next to me, so I kicked him down. ?

15. A man at the wine table called his wife repeatedly. ?Honey, I'll be home in a minute. ?Everyone had goosebumps all over the floor, joking that he was afraid that his wife would steal someone at home. The man replied with a look of sorrow and anger: It’s much scarier than that. She is shopping for treasure at home!

16. Nowadays everyone is playing with mobile phones. How many years from now? Only QR codes will be engraved on the tombstones. When you take out your mobile phone and scan it, the story of your life will come out. Who did you love, whom did you hate, and who do you still care about? This is called "grave sweeping".

This is not the scariest thing. The scariest thing is that after scanning, you will receive a message that says: The other party has agreed to add you as a friend.

17. After the work dinner, we played poker for a while. A colleague called his wife to ask for leave: Hello, wife, everyone is at work. I will play three-on-one with my colleagues and go back later. His wife asked on the phone: "When will it be later?" His colleague said: "I can't tell. I'll go back immediately after playing." Putting down the phone, I asked: Brother Liu, have you asked for leave? Colleague: Can you not ask for leave? Your sister-in-law is quite reasonable. Me: How long did it take? Colleague: Just one night. She said, if you don't come back after that time, don't come back at night. ?

18. Ask a woman why she wants a divorce? "Because I have already caught him!" Ask a man why he wants a divorce? "Because I have found out her details!

19. A colleague bought a new kidney and showed it off to us every day! Other colleagues and I planned to punish him and we set up a discussion group to bring him in! Colleague A sent a blank voice message, (nothing was said) Said) Colleague B replied: Is it true or false? Colleague C replied: Absolutely true! I saw it too! Colleague D replied: I will take a closer look tomorrow! My colleague asked for leave to repair his mobile phone the next day?

20. Square and Rectangle were shopping, and Triangle came towards them. Square whispered: "Look, the one in front must be the lady." Rectangle wondered: "How did you know?" Square said proudly: "Because he is waiting." Whip triangle!?

Interesting and funny jokes

1. An aristocratic girl was about to get married. Her mother told her: When going to bed on honeymoon, you should not go to bed right away. Take off all your clothes and be a little reserved. After returning from the honeymoon, the groom asked his mother-in-law: "Is there anyone in your family who is mentally ill? What's going on with your daughter on our honeymoon?" Wear a hat to sleep every day? ?

2. The moon revolves around the earth day and night, but the earth ignores it and still revolves around the sun, even if it is burning with blazing light. One day, the stars asked the earth: "Why do you risk your life to chase the sun instead of the moon?" The earth said helplessly: "I just want the sun."

3. One day, a colleague in the company was visiting. When I was doing a report, I farted suddenly, and the second-rate guy said calmly: That's not a fart.

Before I could say the second half of the sentence, a faint sentence came from the corner: It's your chrysanthemum that is sighing.

4. In the middle of dinner at a restaurant with my sisters at night, she got oily on her hands and had to wipe them with paper. In the end, she took out a pack of sanitary napkins. Unexpectedly, she didn't notice and tore it open to wipe it off. I quickly walked to the other side and grabbed it. Afraid of being embarrassed by the waiter. As a result, she didn't understand the situation and screamed when she saw me coming to grab her. The people on the side were all paying attention! Two male waiters rushed over immediately. They were quite handsome. Stop me hard. ?Miss, you can’t change it here! You can’t change it!?

5. A man said to another man: ?Did you know? Soap was actually used for bathing five hundred years ago. ? I asked shyly, what is it used for now?

6. A pure little girl came to the work unit. To welcome her, she organized a ktv happy trip. A buddy ordered a rather difficult song. After hitting the high notes, he said to the little girl: "Look at my dick." ?, "Don't look at it," the little girl said solemnly.

7. The bear and the rabbit were defecating in the forest. At the end of the process, the bear thought for a while and asked the rabbit: "Does it not matter if the fur is stained with feces?" The rabbit replied: "It does not matter!" So the bear took it. The rabbit wiped his butt.

8. I changed my QQ signature to "I love your wife". At this time, many people asked me if I was in love, but most people still insisted that my account was hacked. In fact, The truth is that I typed the space in the wrong place. When I changed my signature back to: "I love your wife", everyone said, this is it, yes.

9. When Wang Xianzhi was a child, he asked his father Wang Xizhi the secret of calligraphy. Wang Xizhi said that there is no secret but the word diligence. You go and finish writing on the eighteen jars of water in the yard, and your calligraphy will be complete. Wang Xianzhi practiced hard day and night and became a great master. Sima Guang's father Sima Chi liked this story very much and prepared eighteen tanks of water at home for Sima Guang to practice calligraphy. After a while, the housekeeper came to report: Master, the young master is so smart!

10. An Asian doctor came to work in a certain tribe in Africa. One day, the local chief came to him angrily and said: Why did one of my wives give birth to a child with yellow skin?

11. The doctor was very panicked, thought for a moment and said: You have I didn't see the sheep outside. The other sheep were all white, but the chief who was black pointed the gun at the doctor and said: "As long as you don't tell anyone, the matter between you and my wife will be over." ?

12. I dreamed that I was getting married, and the priest said: ?Now, please exchange QQ passwords with the bride and groom. ?I woke up immediately with a fright?

13. One day, Rabbit was watching TV and suddenly heard a knock on the door. He went to open the door but saw no one. ?Hello, can you give me some water to drink? Only then did the rabbit find a snail at the door. ?No!? The rabbit kicked the snail away angrily. A few years later, Rabbit was watching TV alone at home again, and the knock on the door rang again. The rabbit ran to open the door, and the snail said: Why did you kick me just now?

14. A woman has three lovers. One is Gao, the other is Li, and the other is Chen. A few months later the girl gave birth to a son. The woman didn't know who her son was, and she was worried about the name of the child. A senior monk named the child: Guo Chunhai. ?When the girl heard this, she was very happy. Take the upper part of the character "Gao", the lower part of the character "Li", and the left part of the character "Chen" to form "Guo", so together they are "Gao, Li, Chen, three people a day, each one a little." ?

15. I have a friend who is good-looking and has good character. Many girls like him, but he has a girlfriend. One day his girlfriend was playing with his mobile phone and used his account to post a status on Moments that read: "If you dare to reply that you love me, I will be with you." ?Then silently deleted all the girls who responded. My good friend only found out today?

16. Which monster does Tang Seng like the most? Only the white dragon horse under his crotch knows best. Hahaha. .

17. One day, the female secretary said solemnly: Mr. Wang, I am pregnant. Wang continued to look down at the document, and then smiled faintly: I have been sterilized a long time ago. The female secretary was stunned for a while and said with a charming smile: I'm kidding you! Wang raised his head and glanced at her, took a sip of tea and said: Me too.

18. It was dark, and I was on my way to work, when suddenly a car stopped next to me. Man: Beauty, I will take you wherever you are going. When I turned around, I only heard "everything", and people drove away in cars. Me?

19. A man goes to propose marriage, and the girl’s parents: Please introduce yourself.

A said: I have 10 million; B said: I have a mansion worth 20 million; the parents are very satisfied. Just ask C, what do you have at home? C answered: I have nothing, only a child in your daughter’s belly. AB was speechless and left.

20. On the day the college entrance examination ended, I sent a group text message to all the teachers. One paragraph said: "I have worried you during this period, thank you." I was bored today and was going to delete the extra text messages, but suddenly I found that when I wrote the text message, I left out the word "心", I am a girl woo hoo

Interesting and hilarious jokes

1. A male cadre was unwilling to help Tibet because he was afraid of hardship and lied about suddenly losing his sight. The leader heard this and asked a beautiful woman to take off her clothes and stand in front of him. He asked, "Have you seen it?" The answer: "I can't see it." The leader kicked him on the buttocks: Damn it, your dick is erect and you can’t even see it? Pack your bags and go to Tibet tomorrow.

2. The graduation speech of a teacher from Henan University went viral: I wish the graduating students that the apples they buy will be free of worms, the drinks they buy will last a lifetime, the delivery boys all look like Song Joong-ki, and all female classmates can find them. A good mother-in-law, the mother-in-law of a male classmate can swim. Damn it, this is outrageous. . .

3. There are two types of women that men yearn for: those who can do any posture, and those who can’t do any posture.

4. Miss Zhao Si started dating Zhang Xueliang when she was sixteen. One year is considered an affair; three years is considered an affair; sixty years is an eternal love!

5. Hunan candidates Xiao Ming and Xiao Hong, their childhood sweethearts, agreed to apply for the same university during the college entrance examination. , the stressful college entrance examination was over, and both of them did pretty well, so in the fall, one went to Lanzhou University and the other to Nanda University. Haha, dialects kill people. .

6. I have never understood why my boyfriend broke up with me. Today I finally couldn’t help but call him and ask him. He was silent for a while and said: "I am pregnant with your child!" I heard I was shocked, calmly thought about it, and asked him: "But you are a man!" He howled hysterically: "Look, you still don't trust me so much! This is the reason why we broke up!"

7. There was a fire in the women's bathroom. People inside were in a mess. They ran out naked and saw a large group of white flowers on the street. An old man shouted "Hurry up and cover it up!". The naked women suddenly woke up, but important parts of their bodies were missing. There were three places that I was so busy trying to cover, I was at a loss. At this time, the old man shouted again: "Just cover your face, it's the same below!" 8. It's really cool to live to be more than a hundred years old. Look at her sitting peacefully at the door of the community. Knitting pants in the sun, maybe she is thinking in her mind: The colleague who put my little shoes on has been dead for eight years, right? Hehe! What about the mistress and bitch back then? They have been dead for twenty years, right?< /p>

9. If Xiao Fengxian, a famous prostitute in the early Republic of China, had followed migrant workers, she would have been targeted in the anti-pornography campaign; if she had followed Cai E, she would have been famous forever; if she had followed Sun Yat-sen, she might have become the mother of the country.

10. Organizing a few people to collect protection fees is a gangland. Zhu Yuanzhang organized millions of people to seize the throne and became a great emperor. Wu Zetian slept with her father-in-law and her son. Although it was incest, the incest was serious enough, so she became the queen.