Parents are particularly patriarchal. Can this concept be changed?

Preference for boys has already penetrated into the bone marrow of many people.

Whether in poor rural areas, relatively rich rural areas, small cities or big cities, there are parents who prefer sons to daughters.

It is never uncommon in rural areas to let the daughter drop out of school to work for her son to study and leave the bride price to his son to marry his wife. There are also those who search for their daughters to make up for their sons. For example, in Ode to Joy, Fan's parents are good to their children, but they clearly put forward that the real estate should be left to their sons.

Polarization, a daughter who does not want to be "exploited", can refuse and escape from this unfair environment.

However, a post on Tianya has opened another door to son preference. It turns out that some parents are secretly poking boys over girls.

For the convenience of narration, I will call the protagonist Xuan He and her husband.

Xuan has a brother, but unlike other girls, she has no education, and her family has a close relationship with her brother. Instead, I enjoy almost the same treatment as my brother, go to college, and not be "coaxed" by my parents to earn money after graduation.

Generally speaking, it has long been known that parents prefer boys to girls, but the treatment gap between brother and sister is not that big, so there is not much feeling.

Although Jessica Hester Hsuan was not satisfied, her growing experience convinced her that her parents loved her.

Later, the two brothers and sisters got married separately, and their parents gave hundreds of thousands of down payment to Xuan Ge who stayed in other provinces, and only gave two quilts and a set of tableware as a dowry.

Xuan didn't think it was unfair, because my brother bought the house and my parents didn't have much money, so they should keep it for the elderly.

Xuan is close to her parents, so parents call her if they need anything. Xuan and Xiao Chen Ye come to help and send something if necessary.

It is said that respecting the old and caring for the young, not to mention that your parents' in-laws are not filial and abnormal? Some people don't think so.

02

One day, Xuan's father said that the sewer was leaking, so Xuan came from work early with him, brought tools, bought food and came to her parents' community with big bags.

Because Chen Xiao had a phone call back, they planned to stay in the community park for a while before going up, only to find that their filial piety turned into a joke.

The two overheard their parents chatting.

First, I heard from Xuan's father that we should not think that Xuan and Chen are really good to us.

"I'm anxious to be good to us. I may wonder what we will give her in the future. Xiao Chen just showed it to us, otherwise he would agree to help her family in this way. Can other people's sons really be good to us? "

After taking it, I agreed, but I also advised my father not to cold the hearts of his daughter and wife.

Xuan's father said he was not stupid. He will not really tell her that he is dead, that is, he will not say that his daughter has no share, otherwise his daughter-in-law will not be filial to herself in the future.

Later, the two talked about their sons who were far away from home, scrambling to be filial to their parents-in-law, saying that their sons were stupid and the older generation were sons. Who cares about their son-in-law?

In the end, the two concluded that the property belongs to their parents and will be given to their children when their parents are gone. As for how to divide it, I won't say it, so as not to be eaten by my son and daughter-in-law, and also to please my daughter-in-law.

And make a plan, you can't give your son money in advance, and be polite to your daughter and son-in-law in the future. The gentler you are to your daughter, the gentler she will be.

Again, if it weren't for their parents' money, the couple would definitely ignore them.

They don't know there is a kind of filial piety, but really just want to express their gratitude to their parents for their parenting.

The sewer can't be repaired. Xiao Chen is not a fool. He went to pick up the children and go to his parents' house for dinner. He didn't go with her, leaving a hair dryer.

That night, Xiao Chenmei came home, and Mary cried on the sofa all night.

She doesn't understand that compared with her brother, she has always been carefree, caring for her parents and never asking them for money. How did she become "family fortune's schemer" in the eyes of her parents?

I want to break up with my parents and remember the love and care they gave me when I was a child. I encouraged her to study. My parents hugged her two brothers and sisters when there was delicious food.

There is a kind of parents who don't care about their daughters, but when their daughters affect their sons' interests, they become the one who is abandoned and calculated.

03

Zhihu has a question: What is a daughter in the eyes of parents who prefer sons to daughters?

The netizen figure did not say in the answer: it is a dispensable spare tire pension machine.

Born without expectation, born without treasure, the biggest role may be to provide for the parents when the son is out of reach.

The entanglement of this lady on Tianya Post is understandable. Is it wrong for parents to give themselves a chance to receive education when they are born?

But it is hard to avoid feeling sad to think that parents not only calculate themselves, but also have no sincerity to themselves and even deny their filial piety.

In this case, it's time for her to change her method:

First, accept, don't struggle.

It's hard to change the concept of son preference. You don't need to worry about why your parents are like this, and you don't need to try to reverse your parents' ideas.

Some girls will sacrifice their lives to show their parents that their daughters are better, which is unnecessary.

Second, no longer infinite filial piety to parents.

On the one hand, parents are not old enough to be taken care of, on the other hand, parents are not short of money, so they can spend money to find someone to help repair sewers and the like.

It is proper to visit parents regularly, and many parents have not reached the point where they need to cut off contacts.

Third, consider more for your family.

Don't sacrifice the interests of your small family and husband in order to honor your parents, let alone give your parents a chance to hurt him again.

Live your own life, and live your own life is the most important thing.

It is better to live a good life than to win the approval of your parents.

If your parents love you, they will want you to live well; If your parents don't love you, you have to live a better life.