What are the very useful "hidden rules" in interpersonal communication?

1. When you have no money, don't complain to others, lest you be regarded as a joke.

Everyone only talks about seven points, there is no need to talk to everyone, everyone is very busy and has no time to listen to you. What you think is a big deal may not be worth mentioning in the eyes of others.

I used to be the kind of person who likes to tell my friends everything, but as it turns out, I told them that they were comforting me on the surface, but in fact they said I was too melodramatic behind my back. From then on, I stopped talking to people casually.

No matter how good a friend is, don't have money dealings with each other. Don't use money to test human nature. You can't afford to lose, and the result will disappoint you.

4. Colleagues or friends don't ask how much others earn, which is a kind of privacy of others. Asking too much will make people think that you are impolite and have no proper limits.

There is no need to trust anyone completely, especially between relatives.

6. When visiting relatives or friends, be sure to bring some gifts, either tea or local specialties. Never leave empty-handed, or others won't invite you next time.

7. Reciprocity is an eternal truth in interpersonal relationships. If someone invites you today, please come again next time. In the long run, your feelings have also been strengthened.

8. When a friend gets married and wants to go to someone else's house, it's best to inform him in advance. Is it convenient to ask? It is best not to go to other people's homes after 10 at night, unless there is something particularly urgent, it will disturb others' rest.

9. A friend who doesn't usually get in touch with you suddenly asks you "Are you there" or suddenly calls you, probably asking for a loan. If you don't want to borrow, you'd better find a reasonable excuse, otherwise the money you lent will probably be wasted, and there will be no return.

Last month, a distant cousin of mine who hadn't contacted for more than two years suddenly called me and asked me if I had any money, saying that he wanted to borrow some money.

I said I had no money, and all the money was used to decorate the house. After he listened to it, did 500 have it? I didn't think much about it at the time, so I said there were still 500. Then, he said, lend me 500 yuan first and pay you back the day after tomorrow.

Until now, the 500 yuan has not been returned to me, and I am too lazy to ask him for it. If I let him take it, I will say it is stingy, just like I spent 500 yuan to see through a person.

10. Don't speak ill of colleagues or bosses behind their backs, otherwise, maybe what you say today will reach the other person's ears tomorrow.

1 1. Don't judge the clothes of others, even your best friends, because you never know how hard their life is.

There was a time when I was very frugal. I didn't buy new clothes, so I have been wearing an old sweater. Then a friend went out with me and said contemptuously in front of others, "why are you wearing this dress again?" I see that you have been wearing this dress for a week. Don't you want to wash it? "

Suddenly, I was speechless and turned away, not wanting to have any too much contact with him. When you want to judge others, please think about whether you are qualified.

12. People who talk less and do more will be welcomed wherever they go. Everyone seems to like people who talk a lot, but in fact they secretly appreciate people who work hard.

13. Go out for dinner with friends. You'd better ask AA or who will treat you before ordering. Get ready. I wonder who will pay for this meal after dinner.

14. It is good to make more friends, but when your own ability is not enough, you can't make others better than you. Therefore, if you want to improve your own circle, you must first improve your own strength. In this society, what represents a person's strength? That is the ability to make money, and this is the reality.

15. When we go out to eat together, it's best to arrive five minutes earlier than the appointed time, don't be late, and when picking vegetables, don't turn over the dishes with chopsticks at every turn, which is rude to others.

16. When you go to someone else's house, remember to put the cups you drank on the table back in place; If the tea in the cup is not finished, then pour it out first; When you go out, put the slippers back in their original places and stack them neatly.

17. If someone invites you to dinner or gives you something, don't say it, even if it's not delicious, or something you don't like. This is a kind of respect for others. If someone can invite you to dinner or send you something, you should thank them.

18. Don't waste other people's time. For adults, time is the most precious. Say what you have to say. There is no need to beat around the bush.

19. Don't smile at the opposite sex, it's easy for the other person to misunderstand, and the result may be very bad then.

20. Don't show it on your face if you don't like any friends. Just reduce contact. Everyone has everyone's habits. There is no need to pester too much for the unsuitable person and waste your time and energy.

2 1. There is no need to be angry with others. It's not worth getting angry about your health. No matter how angry you are, no one else will lose anything but yourself.

22. Make money, show off less and keep a low profile. The more you like to show off, the worse the result may be.

23. Everyone has his own way of making money. Don't ask. You won't get the answer you really want if you ask.

24. Before seeing a friend make money and want to cooperate with others, think about what you can offer to each other.

Kindness is a good virtue, but for some people, it is unnecessary to be too kind. You are too kind, but it will make people think that you are a soft persimmon and easy to pinch.

26. A friend asks you out. If you don't go, explain why, otherwise the other party will think you are cold and don't make an appointment.

27. Parents' kindness to you is unconditional; Your friend needs your reward for being kind to you.

28. Don't say that others' success is luck. Such behavior will make you look incompetent.

29. Don't point fingers at other people's families. Don't jump to conclusions if you don't know the whole picture.

30. Always keep a certain distance from your friends. Don't think you are good with each other. You can ask any question and say anything. You may offend each other if you are not careful.

There is still a lot of knowledge in interpersonal communication, which requires each of us to experience, ponder and summarize methods in practice.

I hope you can also do the 30 items mentioned above. In this case, you can be regarded as an expert in interpersonal communication, and friends around you will be more willing to get along with you.

People will say that you are a person with high emotional intelligence.

Your own summary, try to write some comprehensive for everyone:

1, don't overestimate your position in anyone's heart. The other person is the treasure in your heart, and you may be the grass in others' eyes.

5, don't leave the worst emotions to the closest and favorite people, or you will regret it one day, and it's too late to regret it. Money is very important, but don't hurt someone who really loves you for money. No amount of money can make up for a broken heart.

6. Be upright, speak tactfully, and don't speak straight. That's not true temperament. You have offended others, and you don't know it. China people can neither please nor offend. Bury your pride in your heart. Be a man like a resilient grass, not like a towering tree that breaks easily in a storm.

8. Any person, thing or relationship that makes you feel uncomfortable and unsafe, it is very important for each of us to stay away for the first time and stop the loss in time.

9. Good medicine tastes bitter and is good for illness, but advice when most unpleasant is good for action. I will say anything, but most people actually don't like to hear the truth. What they need is the echo of others, which is a well-meaning "lie". Praise each other more, you will be surprised after a long time.

13, interpersonal communication is the most taboo, which will make the other party feel that he is not a serious friend. Find someone else if you have something to do, and disappear if you have nothing to do.

15. If someone around you deliberately approaches you to please you, everything the other person says will suit your heart and please you. You should pay attention, this may not be true love for you, but it may be a trap.

16. When dealing with contradictions and disputes, you should be gentle in tone and firm in attitude, so that the other party can realize that you are here to solve things, not to make trouble. Don't swear, it will only irritate each other and escalate the contradiction. Leave a line in everything so that we can meet again later. If you handle things with this skill, everyone will look up to you and give you face.

18, don't make an impulsive decision in the middle of the night, and have a good sleep at night. It is not too late to make a decision when you are calm the next day.

19, the more you cherish a relationship, the more you hold the other person in your hand and do everything possible to be nice to him, the more the other person thinks you are dispensable.

When you are young, you must try to earn more money. It doesn't matter whether you have more money or less, as long as you have a way, and develop more sideline businesses. As you get older, it will become more and more difficult to earn money. Learning ability, knowledge updating speed and physical fitness can't keep up.

2 1. Appreciating a person begins with face value, respects talent, fits in with personality, is good at kindness, and finally has personality. Spend more time with people with similar views, your life will benefit and your friendship will last for a long time.

22. The person who speaks ill of you is not because of his low emotional intelligence, but because you are worthless in his eyes and he can't curry favor with you. He just looks down on you, that's all. When he meets dignitaries, rich people will say good things.

What people say and what they really think are often two different things. It is simple to know what a person really thinks, just watch what he does.

24, "hidden rules", "bottom line" these things, for some people can be infinitely suppressed, in the eyes of some people really only benefit.

26. You may not see people's hearts for a long time, because people's hearts will change, especially when the benefits are large enough. It is necessary to guard against people.

27. Some people said they would invite you to dinner and get together, but they didn't agree on a specific time. That's being polite to you. Don't take it seriously. Friends who sincerely invite you to dinner will make an appointment in advance.

28. Don't go to other people's homes empty-handed. According to the custom in China, you should bring at least two things. Nobleness is not important. What matters is your mind and the other person's face. It is the same to ask others to do one thing. Remember to express it when you are done, and it is also a matter of finding someone else next time.

29. A threesome must have a teacher. If you don't understand, just ask. There's no shame. It's a shame to be poked without pretending to understand. When you meet someone who is willing to teach himself, don't forget to express it afterwards. Don't use people to face forward, don't use people to face back.

30. A lie needs a hundred lies to be round. Adults should not lie casually, even white lies. Over time, it will affect your credit and image in the hearts of others.

3 1. Talk to your opponent as loudly as possible every day, forming a shocking momentum. When talking to strangers, the volume should be moderate, and when talking to close people, the volume should be low to keep privacy.

Don't always complain about your misfortune or difficulties to others. Say it once, maybe the other person will sympathize with you. If you talk too much, people will only avoid you.

33. Eat people with short mouths and short hands. If you owe money to others, try to pay it back as soon as possible. If you don't take the initiative to return, after the other party lets everyone in the circle know, it will not be worth the candle.

35. Don't discuss with others everywhere and don't talk about it everywhere until things are done successfully. Otherwise, things didn't work out in the end, and I became a joke.

36. Old classmates who haven't seen each other for many years spend all day in the WeChat circle of friends, sunbathing in luxury villas and traveling abroad. You should be careful. Those photos may have been shown to you on purpose. Beware of "new killing pig plate"

37. There are no eternal enemies and no eternal friends. What connects the emotional relationship of adults is tangible benefits.

38. Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you. Don't force others to do things you don't want to do unless you want them to alienate you.

39. Friends of the opposite sex who used to play very well, once the other person is in love, you should take the initiative to keep your distance. Because the other half won't believe that you are just ordinary friends, so don't make trouble for yourself. One more thing is better than one less thing.

40. Don't promise things that you can't do easily, or the other party will think that you have broken your promise in the future.

4 1. If you want to get closer to your colleagues, you can give them a small gift on their birthdays, except a red envelope, which is not expensive but beautiful, and colleagues will think of you as soon as they see it.

42. Don't speak ill of your colleagues in the office. Talk about the gossip of the boss, and someone will embellish it and spread it to you.

1, don't dispute with everyone.

At the age of 20, you should know that it is useless to please people. You please everyone except yourself.

Being a man and being proper to yourself will make you happier and attract people who really like you to be close to you.

2, don't joke easily, that's not humor, just a mouth.

All jokes are subconscious truths. Too many jokes, one day, others will attack.

3. Don't argue with others about length and right and wrong.

There are more ideological differences between people than between people and gorillas. Don't try to beat anyone in words, it's useless, you can't beat anyone.

Of course, just keep this sentence in mind silently and don't say it as a weapon to fight back.

You are about to graduate, or have entered the society. Don't spend too much money or borrow money to spend.

Although money is not saved, it is really hard to earn. When you are young, don't borrow money to live a life of excessive consumption or excessive consumption.

Don't listen to the statement that the daily interest rate of a treasure or a letter is 15000 yuan or 13000 yuan. If the comprehensive annual interest rate is above 18%, don't borrow money from small loan companies.

Don't spend too much money or borrow money to spend.

Don't spend too much money or borrow money to spend.

If you really need a loan to start a business or invest in yourself, you must control the amount and borrow from formal channels.

5, few words, love to argue, as a good eloquence.

There is only one kind of real eloquence, that is, you can quickly grasp each other's needs and give you an accurate response.

6. Softness without boundaries will only make the other side push your luck; Unprincipled kindness will only let the other person do whatever he wants.

Hold your own borders, and when others invade, tell them clearly-no!

Kindness requires principles, and some people and things are doomed to be unworthy of kindness, so don't let the heart of the Virgin overflow.

7. Networking is not how many people you know, but how many people you can help.

If you can help others, you will be valuable to others, and then they may help you.

8. Whether you are working for someone or starting your own business, you must master some workplace skills and rules.

9. When you enter the society, what you bring out from school is only ability, just learning ability.

10, all the irritability is because there is no money. All the pain is because you can't make money.

1 1 But the meaning between men and women often begins with "sorry" and ends with "really boring".

12, I'll pay the bill = I'm just saying, that's what I mean. I'll pay the bill = I'm serious!

13, don't overuse your gender bonus. Especially girls, will only make others look down upon them.

14, success is the mother of success, and time is the father of success. Use time to accumulate small successes, deepen a field, and strive to achieve TOP5%. The road to success will never be congested, because few people persist.

15, there are often sudden insults in society, which must be endured.

16, giving others more positive affirmation is also accumulating good karma for yourself.

17, the so-called poor thinking, just thinking when there is no money. If you want to make the right choice as much as possible, pretend to be a rich man. This is the thinking of the rich.

18, don't leave bad feelings to the closest people. No explanation.

19, believe me, you will always overestimate the role of one day and underestimate the impact of one year. Keep doing it and be a friend of time.

20, face value and money, in 99% of the time, is a passport to walk the rivers and lakes.

2 1, whether you accept it or not, the world depends on the result.

Don't put all your money in, leave more cash.

23. Don't listen to high-yield and high-return, that's not a huge risk, that's a liar.

The only sign of maturity is that you don't care about the views of the opposite sex.

25, the secret of success is actually very simple, that is, continue to do one thing, do it to the extreme, and enjoy the dividend of time.

Tang Jiasan Shao 10 has updated 8000 words every day for many years and never stopped writing. Every day except eating and sleeping is a code word. When his wife gave birth to a child, he wrote online articles outside the delivery room.

It's not that most people can't find a good trajectory, but they are always worried that they are not taking a good trajectory, looking around and eventually achieving nothing.

26, chicken soup is not unreasonable, but chicken soup has been highly concentrated and simplified the truth, did not tell you all kinds of accidents outside the truth, and will not tell you those shady.

27. If you want long-term happiness, you must give up most of the short-term happiness.

Tik Tok, you can be stupid all day, and then what? One day, you have to pay it back. Long-term happiness is based on short-term unhappiness.

28. Choice is more important than effort. However, choice is not for you to gamble. Choice itself is a skill, which needs you to practice and improve deliberately.

29. "Don't make a promise unless it's appropriate. If it is light, it will be promised, and if it is heavy, it will advance and retreat. " -"Disciples Rules"

Don't complain about what you promised, and don't promise what you complained.

When you encounter difficulties, don't immerse yourself in them, and try to solve them. Then, you will find that 99% of your troubles have disappeared in the process of solving the problem.