Altman funny dubbing segment

Xiaoxi saw a doctor 1 time. He said, 1 I feel someone under the bed when I sleep, 1 I feel someone under the bed when I bow my head. I'm going crazy.

Doctor: You come here every day 1 time 1 time 1 time. I promise that you will recover in 1 year.

Xiaoxi turned and left.

1 month later, the doctor looked at Xiaoxi and said, why don't you come to treat the disease?

Xiao Xi: I had Meng Xiao saw off my bed leg.

There were 1 little dreams and streams and Jack passed 1 very smelly fox holes.

Meng Xiao: We bet that 1000 yuan will last longer than who gets in.

Two people agree!

Xiaoxi went in 1 minute and ran out.

Meng Xiao went in for two minutes and then ran out.

Jack has been in for 30 minutes and hasn't come out yet.

Both of them are wondering.

Suddenly 1 the fox came out and said that he was so powerful that shit stinks worse than me and smoked me out.

Xiaoxi went to deliver food to Otto's father and saw 1 the cleaner (Taylor) cleaning the ditch, so he looked curious.

Taylor: What are you looking at? What is there to see?

Xiao Xi: I dropped my 1000 yuan here.

Taylor: Send the meal quickly. 1 It will get cold! I thought to myself: haha, the money is mine!

Xiaoxi passed by after dinner and saw Taylor groping in the sewage. Taylor: Are you sure this is where the money fell?

Xiao Xi: Yes, Meng Xiao helped me catch it here.

I have 1 a little dream to have my teeth pulled out. When the tooth was pulled out, the doctor shook his hand 1 and fell into his throat.

Meng Xiao went to the throat department, and the throat doctor said, My stomach is upset. See a doctor.

Meng Xiao went to the digestive department for an X-ray examination, but the doctor said: It has entered the intestine.

Meng Xiao went to see an enterologist, but he said that it had fallen on his ass.

Meng Xiao looked for a doctor who specializes in treating buttocks for a long time and said: The tooth has grown on the buttocks, so go to the dentist to pull it out!

King Otto: Xiao Meng, what will happen to you if I die now?

Dream: I will be very sad.

King Otto said proudly, Why?

Meng Xiao: Because your plan to take me to the Internet cafe tomorrow has been cancelled.

Otto's father works 1 day.

Meng Xiao shouted. ..........

Otto's father: Be quiet. I'll play for you 10 yuan.

Later, Meng Xiao told Xiaoxi.

Xiaoxi shouted ..........

After Xiao Xi, Otto's father said, get out of here and leave me alone!

When the results of the math exam were announced. ........

Otto's father: This time, it was Meng who got 0. ......

Meng Xiao jumped off a building. ........

Otto's father: I'm not finished. It's Xiaoxi, Meng Xiao's deskmate.

The stream jumped off the building. ........

There are 1 times when Xiaoxi flashes Meng Xiao's energy light.

Meng Xiao went to Tyler in tears.

Dream: Taylor's brother Xiaoxi hit me.

Taylor went to the stream with a little dream.

Taylor: How can you dream that the energy lights are flashing?

Xiao Xi: So what?

Taylor: If you want to fight, you must kill yourself.

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 2010-07-2019:12

Taylor taught Meng Xiao how to fight, and Meng Xiao picked up the board and kicked it for half an hour. Dentelle came to the people's procuratorate, he shouted:

My laptop and LCD TV!

Dream: No way, there are not enough boards.

Meng Xiao has dinner with his six brothers. Next to Zuo Fei is his favorite pepper, next to Yigen is coffee, next to Saiwen is curry, next to Jack is milk, next to Ace is vinegar, and next to Taylor is mayonnaise. Declare that this is an endurance test for postgraduate entrance examination, so I put aside my favorite things. ) Meng Xiao accidentally knocked over Taylor's mayonnaise. Taylor went to the rescue and knocked over Ace's vinegar. Ace touched Jack's milk again.

One day, Taylor was ill. Meng Xiao and Xiaoxi want to help Taylor cook a pot of soup. They didn't notice that they had the recipe backwards. Strangely, Tyro recovered, but Tyro went to the toilet no less than 200 times every night! Diga suddenly fainted while brushing her teeth one day. The reason: Meng Xiao took a toothbrush to brush the toilet, gas pipes, cars, sewers and all tableware.

Austrian soldiers take part in military training and eat pickles and rice. They didn't say a word when they saw the Austrian king eating, too. The Austrian king dug his own rice, which was full of delicious warm-up exercises done by Zuo Fei on the 2000m platform. Meng Xiao and Xiaoxi survived and wanted to give Zuo Fei a whole meal. Meng Xiao kicked Zuo Fei down, and the stream put the water into the swimming pool.

(imagine the consequences)

Fei said to Orff, "We can't let them play computer games. They play Grand Theft Auto. Today, they saw a car in the street and drove away." Meng Xiao made an appointment to sneak into Diga's house for revenge. The two brothers climbed the roof of Dijia's house with scaffolding, but as soon as they climbed up, one corner of the roof collapsed. Xiao Di came out, didn't see anything, and went back (because Meng Xiao stamped his feet with Xiaoxi). I want to train this boy's martial arts!

Taylor: Well, it's not hard ... just. ...

Leo: Just what?

I don't know ... (Dream, take care)

…………

Yinshizi team headquarters

Team member A: Otto's mother Leo kicked her with Leo's fly and is now in the emergency room.

Om: I know ... I've been very busy recently ... Leo's fighting skills didn't come for nothing. He feels sorry for Beyonce. He will be hospitalized every two days ... What happened to Saiwen?

Team member B: While training Diga's sensitivity, she mistakenly shot Amelia's rays at Diga's crotch ... Rena, a member of the Victory Team, took the Yan Fei No.2 to Otter Star and tried her best to find the star cluster ... At noon, everyone was eating a 5-yuan box lunch and dreamed that he was eating 500 yuan. Everyone was shocked. Only the dream took out 100 boxes of that kind of box lunch from behind.

My dream was visited by my family because I didn't do well in the exam. I went to the store to buy a bottle of hard cream and put a lot on my body. The home visit was changed to a video home visit, which ended perfectly. The next day, hoping to find that my dream didn't come, I called to ask. It turns out that there are too many dreams and my body can't move.

Max likes to eat stinky tofu, and everyone doesn't like to sit with him when eating. One day, Max brought a fat sausage and invited everyone to eat a piece. Everyone sent it out of the classroom with lunch boxes, because he invited everyone to eat the last. ......

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 2010-07-2121:13

May Fielas: "Hey, hey, I want this school to die ~ ~ Look at me using magic to make their interpersonal relationship just the opposite ~ ~".

The next day, Mei Fielas excitedly came to inspect the results ~ ~ and found Leo and Hikali on the playground.

Leo: "Yo, isn't this Hikari?" How have you been recently? "

Light: "Senior Leo ~ ~ ~ Long time no see, I miss you very much! ! "

Leo: "Come to me if you need anything in the future. Don't mention it ~ ~ "

Light: "Yes, senior" (bow)

May Fielas: "Oh, what was this school like before? ~ ~ ~"

In class, Otto's father is describing the characteristics of Bataan: "He is a tyrannical cosmic man with round eyes and big pliers ~ ~".

Just then, Meng Xiao suddenly struck the table: "Oh, no, I found a large group of baltan people at the seaside this morning! ! "

Otto's father: "What? Is this happening? What's the plot? Zofi, take a few people to see! "

Zofi led the four Otto brothers to escape ~ ~ ~

When they came back at noon, Jack said excitedly, "I didn't expect a double happiness! ! "

Otto's father: "which double happiness is coming?"

Severn: "First, the Baltics are not there. Second, we have crabs to eat at noon ~ ~ ~ "

One day there was a celebration, and everyone ate and drank around the table. As a result, there is not enough rice.

So Zuo Fei said to the waiter, "Ten bowls of rice!"

The waiter thought it was too much trouble to serve ten bowls, so he brought a large basin of rice for them to serve themselves.

As soon as the food was served, Meng Xiao suddenly stopped talking. After half a ring, he jumped out trembling: "Is this one of the bowls?"? ~ ~ ~"

Zaki: "Ha ha ha, I want to raze this campus to the ground! ! ! "

Ace: Who are you?

Zaki: "Benda is ~ ~ ~"

Light: "You don't have to ask. You must be new here! " "

Ace: "Then why is he so dark?"

Light: "Idiot, I'm from Africa ~ ~ ~ But it's so embarrassing!" "

Leo: "You were like this when you first came here ~ ~ ~"

Light: "Say it again (angrily) ~ ~"

Zaki (Khan): "You ~ ~ ~ ~"

Then Otto's father came: "Stop it, you guys!" "

Zaki: "Finally, someone who understands has come ~ ~"

Only Otto's father said seriously, "this classmate, don't you know that tattoos are not allowed in school?"

Zaki vomited blood and died.

Light was dying in the fight with Bogaru, and Meng Xiao quickly carried him back to the school infirmary.

Otto's mother: "Miracles are bound to happen. You go first ~ ~ "

Dream: "Yes ~ ~"

After Meng Xiao left, Otto's mother took off her bare armor: "You don't think I can recognize the vest, do you?"

Light: "Please, will you let me die?"

Otto's mother: "No way ~ ~ You haven't paid your tuition this year ~ ~ ~ Who are we going to find when you die?"

Jack: "Huh? Why is Meng Xiao so excited? "

Meng Xiao: "Seniors, I finally know the meaning of color timer!" " "

Sai Wen: "What do you mean?"

Dream: "friends on earth say that its significance is to let us remember that we have been working hard ~ ~"

At that, everyone else laughed ~ ~ ~

Taylor, clutching his stomach, said, "God, I'm not happy ~ ~ Little dream, the real meaning of color timer is to tell you that the enemy is too strong ~ ~ You have to run away quickly ~ ~ Do you understand?"

Little dream: "I am dizzy ~ ~ ~"

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 20 10-07-22 20: 16

Taylor broke into the office: "Dad, this is a big deal ~ ~ ~"

Otto's father: "What is it?"

Taylor: "I went out to play with the first generation, Saiwen and the five of them, but unfortunately I met Park Chung Soo-sung of the hippo ~ ~ ~ and it turned out ~ ~"

Otto's father: "What was the result?"

Taylor: "Jung Su people in Hippo Park turned them all into tomatoes ~ ~ ~".

Otto's father: "What? There is such a thing! Tell your mother! ! "

Tyro: "Do you want your mother to save them?"

Otto's dad: "What are you thinking? Tell her not to go out to buy food at night ~"

Taylor: "Ah"

Meng Xiao came back from an internship on earth: "Senior, I learned something on earth ~ ~".

Leo: "What is it?"

Dream: "Courage!"

Leo: "Do you still need to learn this thing?"

Meng Xiao: "Then guess what courage is?"

Leo: "Fight Ampala ~"

Dream: "Wrong!"

Taylor: "one-on-one ~"

Dream: "Wrong!"

Zofi: "Then what is courage?"

Little dream: "watch a whole set of" Deep Rain "continuously"

Meng Xiao fought against baltan and was defeated ~ ~ ~ Then Gauss came.

Little dream: "Senior, help me! ! "

Gauss: "Look, he looks like a scorpion. Maybe you can scare him away by learning crow twice! " "

Dream: "Birds crow, I won't!" " "

Gauss: I learned "I'll come ~ ~" twice.

Baltan people suddenly looked at the sky and ran away.

Meng Xiao (admiring): "Senior is amazing! ! "

Gauss: "That is. I didn't represent biology class for nothing! ! ! "

Then Taylor called: "No! ! ! Barton, the volcano bird is flying to you! ! "

Meng Xiao: "That's how baltan runs ~ ~ ~"

Gauss: "I suddenly remembered that I have something to do ~ ~ ~ I have to go first ~ ~" and then I flew away.

There is only a little dream left, and a person is stunned by Barton flying in the distance ~ ~ ~

After class, everyone sat together and chatted.

The first generation: "Taylor, what are these two horns for?"

Taylor: "This is not an angle. This is an energy antenna, which can receive energy. (Excerpted from Otto's story) "

Diga: "I don't believe it ~ ~ ~"

Taylor: "Don't believe it? Let me show you ~ ~ ~ "

I saw him concentrate and begin to absorb energy.

Soon, a voice came from the sky: "Hello, listeners, this is FM 87.4 MHz ~ ~ ~".

Taylor: "Brother Saiwen, do you know? You have always been my idol! "

Sai Wen: "Really?"

Taylor: "My reverence for you is like a surging river, which keeps flowing ~ ~ ~ ~"

Sai Wen: "Really? (Outside the cloud nine) "

Taylor: "especially your top card attack, it was really earth-shattering, making you cry!" " Can you lend it to me? "

Sai Wen: "No problem, take it!" " (ecstatic) "

Taylor took it and ran: "Brothers, I found the tool for cutting watermelons! ! ! "

Sai Wen: "Son of a bitch, come back here ~ ~ ~"

Meng Xiao: "Director, I have a question that has been puzzling for a long time ..."

Otto's father: "Ask!" "

Meng Xiao: "Altman has to practice for 20,000 years to get to the earth, but it takes 10,000 years to master the fighting skills. What will it be used for? "

Otto's father: "That's a good question! You have to learn the skills of the earth people in 10 thousand years. You see, you have a driver's license, a flight license, a professional title, and a four-level certificate ... "

An hour later. ...

Otto's father: "That's all, Meng Xiao. You must work hard. Ten thousand years is very short ... "

Dream: "Know … Know …"

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 20 10-07-23 17:38

Boys joke collection

One day, I was walking in the street and passed a garden. As a result, my left sleeve was accidentally stained by the soil shoveled by the gardener.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry ..." The gardener apologized quickly.

"Never mind!" In the future, I will dust off the soil on my left arm with my right hand, and then straighten my left arm and shake it (is this action familiar)

Only when the red light flashed, Beyonce Altman, our heroic dream, stood awkwardly on the road, and the gardener next to him could throw a basketball with his mouth open …

One day, while walking in the future (he was too idle), he saw someone robbing a bank. "Damn ... turn ..."

I saw someone stealing when I was walking the next day.

"transformation!"

On the third day, I saw someone posting small advertisements.

"transformation!"

……

A month later, the Japanese police and urban management were all laid off.

Yapool: "Ha ha ha ha! I am alive again! Guys. Monbius! Today is your end! "

Forced water: "Sorry! Today is a rest day, please come back tomorrow.

Yapool: "Oh ..."

Auxiliary Police Bird Mountain: "Guys! Sally is gone. "

(Everyone is very busy ...)

Toriyama: "Captain forced the release of water. What's the matter?

Forced water: "I'm really sorry, their orders to me have been conditioned!" " Guys. Come on, Sally. "

Player: "Show!"

Bird Mountain: "55555 ..."

Back to the first episode of TV …

The little girl's balloon flew away, and the future helped her find it.

Future (smile): "Here!"

Little girl: "mom says you can't talk to strangers!" " "Turned and ran away.

the next day ...

Tyro: "Monbis, why are you back?"

Beyonce's face is bitter: "People on earth are so difficult to get along with. They don't talk to strangers! Then I am not ignored? " Muzhimei: "Later, I will give you some curry rice today!" " "

Future: "Ouch ~"

Mumei: "What's the matter? What's the matter? "

Future: "Eat this all day, and now I feel like vomiting ..."

Beauty of Wood: "What do you want to eat?"

Future: "no appetite … give me a cup of coffee!" "

Forcing water: "Ouch ~"

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 20 10-07-26 08: 12

Otto's father: "From today on, you are Altman!" "

Montbius: "Altman?"

Otto's father: "Everyone on earth calls us that ..."

Montbius: So ... what do we call ourselves?

Otto's father ... human ... "

Descent into the world ...

Passerby A: "Look at that! It's Superman! " (Hong Kong translator)

Passerby B: "No! It is simply Superman Overlord! " (Translated by Taiwan Province Province)

Monbius: "Who am I?"

Tyro: Monbis, today I'm going to teach you my ultimate meaning' Otto bomb'!

Montbius: "Is that your own killer skill?"

Taylor: "No … this trick was taught to me by an earthling …" "

Montbius: "What an awesome earthman ... who is it?"

Taylor: Dong Cunrui.

Dark Emperor: "I'm from Ampala!" "

Genghis Khan: "I haven't called myself me yet! Do you deserve it? "

Qin Shihuang: "If you want to be an emperor, you have to pass me first!" "

Emperor Taizong: "We are the strongest!"

Liu Bang: "No, I am the strongest!"

……

Finally, Ampala was drowned alive by saliva ... He never imagined that the earth was a place rich in emperors.

I dreamed of going to earth the next day …

Tyro: "Monbis, why are you back?"

Beyonce Meng's face is bitter: "Everything on the earth uses money, 5555555555 I don't have it. Can you lend me some first?"

Taylor: "…".

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 2010-07/2715: 46

Universe Emperor: "Ha, ha, ha, this king will rule this planet named Earth today! Now look at the scenery from the window of the spaceship! "

five minutes later ...

Universe Emperor (trembling): "Let's … Let's run!" " ! It's too dangerous here! "

At this time, the phoenix nest

Zheping: "Come and see that! There is a mosquito here that looks like a spaceship! "

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 20 10-07-27 20: 17

Dragon: "Captain, why do you call it Meteor Technology?"

Forced water: "Because its time limit is too short, it passes like a meteor ..."

Long: "So with the development of science and technology, the time limit will be longer and longer?"

Loading water: "Yes!"

One day in the future ...

Team member: "Captain, please!"

Captain: "Stellar Technology will be terminated for XXX billion years ..."

Author: Maple Leaf Face Reply Date: 20 10-07-27 20: 18

Zamusha: Sword … Fight with me!

Sword: "Sorry, I can't get the number yet! There are other experts here who want to see you! "

Zamusha: "Are there other swordsmen on earth besides you?"

Sword: "Yes ... I'll introduce you ... This is Musashi Miyamoto, this is rogue mark, this is Ghost Eye Sword, this is Li Xiaoyao, this is Ling Huchong, and this is Ximen Chuixue ..."

Zamusha escaped. ...

Sword: "Get out of my way, since I put on this revenge armor, it is my mission to defeat Bocaru!" " "

Future: "If this continues, even if the revenge is successful, it will be wrapped in another armor called the earth!" "

Sword: "Don't worry, you can't get this kind of armor at the level of the earth people!" " "

Future: "That's not necessarily true. I'll take you to a place ... "

five minutes later

Sword: "Where is this?

Future: "Shops around Altman ... Boss, put on the armor of revenge!"

Boss: "In North Point. Choose a style yourself! "