Classic funny copywriting that makes you laugh so hard that you can’t stand upright

1. I went to Longquan Temple the day before yesterday and saw a horizontal plaque with a message: The karma in my heart. After

thinking about it three times, I sighed that it was wonderful. Karmic obstacles originate in the heart; if the state of mind is pure, everything will disappear. After repeated analysis with the Zen master, I sighed again

Three times, the Zen master said: Donor, you have seen it wrong.

2. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.

3. Master: There is no easy word in the adult world

! Disciple: No. It’s easy to be poor. It’s easy to be bald. It’s easy to be fat!

4. When I was young, people always called me ugly. One day, a group of gangsters called me ugly, and I got upset and started fighting with them. From then on, I never heard anyone call me ugly again, because I was deafened by their beatings.

5. In this final exam, I will use my strength to tell you how many people there are in the first class of our grade.

6. College final exam. We let top students pass on the answers! When leaving the examination room, everyone asked the top student: If there is one less multiple-choice question, is the last one too difficult? The top student replied calmly: The first one can’t write!

7. We are all children of the world, and we should be in the same boat. If anyone has no money in the future, please tell me, and I can tell you how I lived when I had no money. I have rich experience.

8. When I was a child, I was very naughty. Once the teacher invited my parents, but I didn’t dare to tell my parents, so I went to my uncle for help. The teacher and my uncle talked for more than two hours. Later, the teacher at school became obviously nice to me, and later she became my aunt.

9. If you learn, you will find that God has closed the window of English for you, closed the door of mathematics, plugged the drain of physics, and blocked the drain of chemistry. water pipe.

10. Nowadays, some people are complacent when they achieve something and feel that they are great. I am different. I feel great even if I do nothing. 11. "What pants should I wear to look younger?" "I really can't think of anything that makes me look younger than wearing diapers!"

12. Many songs have been removed from the KTV, which is bad for me It doesn't matter at all. For me, as long as the fruit plate doesn't come off the shelves, it's fine.

Thirteen. When a woman is a child, her father loves her, when she grows up, her husband loves her, and when she grows old, her son loves her. Men, listen to their mother when they are young, listen to their wives when they grow up, and listen to their daughters when they grow old.

14. When one or two people said I was fat, I didn’t take it seriously. Later, more and more people said I was fat. At this time, I finally realized the seriousness of the matter. There are liars in this world. There are really more and more.

15. What to do if you don’t want to do laundry. Just take a daughter-in-law. If the daughter-in-law is virtuous, she will wash your clothes; if the daughter-in-law is strong, you will learn how to wash clothes.

16. When I was a child, I thought life was about everything going well and having more than enough every year. When I grew up, I discovered that life is like, everything goes as expected, and there is a balance deficit every year.

17. The tragedy of life is: it’s time for an exam, others are reviewing, but I’m previewing.

18. "What do you think of me as a person?" "Just a bamboo!" "Integrity, nobility, and humility?" "No, it's a bit damaged."

Ten 9. After my wife disappeared, I immediately went to the police station to report the matter. The policeman said to me: Calm down first. You won’t be able to record the incident if you keep laughing like this.

Two

Ten. Two female colleagues at work had a quarrel and came to me for comment.

Seven-tongued

Bad-tongued people did not listen to anything. Not sure, I yelled: "The ugly one goes first." The world immediately became quiet.

21. Xiao Ming in primary school textbooks is always stumped by all kinds of weird questions. But Xiao Ming never appears in middle school textbooks, so I know that guy can’t pass the high school entrance examination!