Happy moment, good joke in the morning.

Happy moment, good joke in the morning.

Humorous people not only tell jokes, but also know jokes told by others. Let's test how high your humor cell index is!

Chapter 1: happy event Good Morning Joke 1. A man said to the pharmacist in the pharmacy, I have too much insomnia. My kitten walked on the carpet and I woke up. The pharmacist quickly took out a packet of powder and handed it to him. He quickly asked: Is this medicine effective? No problem. The pharmacist is very confident. How many times a day do I eat? The pharmacist was in a hurry: absolutely not to eat. Give it to your cat once and it will solve the problem.

The patient complained to the doctor that he couldn't sleep. The doctor saw that several prescriptions were ineffective, so he had to teach him the original treatment: you keep counting until you count to 3000, and then come to me in a few days. The next time we met, the patient was still very sad and depressed. Doctor, I still can't sleep. I kept counting as you said. When I counted to 1786, I was really sleepy, so I had a cup of coffee to refresh myself, and it only counted to 3000. But now I can't sleep again.

I couldn't sleep last night. I can't sleep again and again. My wife said: Come, come, come, lie down and I'll hypnotize you! ? I closed my eyes when I saw my daughter-in-law's fake posture really like that, and opened my eyes after ten minutes, damn it! Idiot wife has fallen asleep! !

A nurse walked into the ward and finally woke up a patient who had fallen asleep. What are you doing? The patient is very unhappy. You must take the medicine on time. The nurse finished and handed over two sleeping pills at the same time.

My brother was beaten, so I went to the hospital to see him and asked him what happened. My younger brother said that if someone bullied me, I would find seven or eight thugs to beat him, on the condition that each person would pay 50 yuan. After what he said, I was curious to ask, how can you beat so many people for fifty dollars alone? I was even more excited when I saw my brother, saying, after we hit that boy, I couldn't pay for it, and was beaten by those seven or eight people again? !

I just bought an electric car recently. When I press the car on the remote control, I will say:? I am here, I am here. ? Today, there were many cars parked in front of the shopping plaza, and I shouted there: Where are you? ! ? You secretly put your hand in your pocket, and you heard the car? I'm here! I'm here! ? Then I felt the shocked expression of a beautiful woman next to me.

7. Watching TV at my cousin's house, suddenly my nephew pointed to Fan Bingbing on TV and said, "Uncle, why is the doll you bought on TV? Mom is coming to see the doll that my uncle bought on TV.

8. A sister said I was fierce. So I answered tactfully: otherwise, how can I be called a macho man?

9. Zhang San felt that he was not his own since he was a child. Once he was playing outside and accidentally fell into a cesspit. Her mother saw it and said, we don't want this baby! Go back and eat another one. ? When she grew up, she had a high fever. Her mother touched his forehead with her hand and immediately retracted her hand and said, hot! ? His father immediately said with a big mouth, look, burn your mother! ? Is this a kiss?

10, I went home from work at noon, and the road was a little wet because of the rain? Just then, I saw a woman running in high heels not far ahead. When she ran not far from me, she suddenly overturned! ! ? Fortunately, I am agile! ! A small jump jumped away: shit, demo, still want to touch porcelain? ! ?

Chapter 2: happy event Good Morning Joke 1. I went to the school toilet yesterday, which is the kind of pit connected with pit and separated one by one. When I started to take off my pants, I lost a dime. I feel a little distressed and can't continue to take off my pants. Collapse? Lost another piece, heartbroken! Then there came a sentence from the pit behind:? Damn it, you think this is the wishing pool! ?

My buddy found a big dog on the road and took it home because of his pity? Dogs want to occupy the territory, always pee at home, and they don't change after repeated education. Finally, the friend couldn't bear it, took off his pants and sprinkled a bubble of urine where the dog had just peed, warning the dog that this was Lao Zi's territory. By the way, dogs don't pee at home anymore.

I was dating my girlfriend one day. While waiting for my girlfriend, I bought a yellow plate under the bridge, bargained with the middle-aged man and put it in my coat pocket. Go to my girlfriend's house for dinner at night. When I first met my future parents-in-law, I never dared to look up. My girlfriend makes fun of me. What happened? I've never seen you so shy before. ? I whispered: I didn't expect your father to sell CDs! ?

The young soldier received a letter from his hometown. When he opened the envelope, he took out a blank sheet of paper. ? What's going on here? The friend asked. ? Here's the thing. The soldier said that when I left my hometown, I had a quarrel with my fiancee. Since then, neither of us has spoken to anyone. ?

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