Humorous sentences about reading

Only if you are willing to make wedding clothes for others and have fun with others can you have endless happiness. In order to please everyone, I specially compiled some humorous sentences about reading for everyone to have fun in their free time.

Selected

1. There used to be such a joke: Almost everyone knows about the white-haired girl, but after being academicized, no one understands it. It seems to be translated like this: On the psychological rebound and physiological reversal of Yang's daughter after being subjected to sexual violence...

2. One day, I was watching VCD, and my mother came in with a book. Mom: "What does 'I don't know.' mean?" I said: "I don't know." Mom: "I've sent you to college for a few years, how come you don't know anything?!" . I said: "No! It's just 'I don't know!'" Mom: "Stay tough!" After saying that, my mother gave me a slap in the face.

3. One day, Xiaodong got into trouble and was found out by the teacher. The teacher asked Xiaodong to come to his office, but he didn't come for more than ten minutes. When the teacher came to the classroom, he saw Xiaodong and a few friends studying seriously. The teacher forgave Xiaodong and walked away. After the teacher walked away for a few seconds, Xiaodong started playing the game console again...

4. Xiao Ming and Xiao Hong were at the same table. One day, Xiao Ming asked Xiao Hong to borrow a pen, and Xiao Hong said, "No." "Lend it to me and you will die!" Then, Xiao Hong said, "Oh, let me lend it to you." When Xiao Ming returned the pen to Xiao Hong, Xiao Hong was really dead.

5. After class, I asked my deskmate: "When will Taiwan want to be reunified?" "When buying instant noodles."

6. Heehee and Haha at school We were good friends when we were studying, very good friends. One day, Haha died. Hehe was very sad. He walked to Haha's grave and said: "Haha, you are dead."

7. Bookstore owner: "This book is cheap and interesting, and it will definitely make you laugh to death." ." Woman: "Buy a copy and I'll take it to my mother-in-law."

8. Strong test answer: The moonlight shines in front of the bed, and Li Bai sleeps soundly.

9. Chongchong: Xiaohua, did you use my pencil? Xiaohua: No, I didn’t use it. Chongchong: Are you really useless? Xiaohua: I am so useless! Chongchong: Alas, you are the first person to admit that you are useless.

10. A man went to the bookstore to buy a book and asked the salesperson: "Do you have the book "How Steel Was Tempered"?" The salesperson replied: "Please go to the Science and Technology Department on the third floor." 1 A man asked: "Do you have a book called "The Man Should Be the Head of the Family" for sale here?" The female clerk smiled and replied: "I'm sorry, we don't sell fairy tale books here."

11 . Two students fell asleep with their books on their hands. The teacher saw it and shook the student he didn't like awake. He criticized severely: "Look at you, you fell asleep with your books. Look at Zhang Ming." , fell asleep and still holding the book!"

12. A father was checking his son's English textbook and saw an extremely scary page: yes - die! nice - die! bus - dad Die! mouth-Mom die! girls-Brother die! was-I die! cheese-fuck you to death!does-die!

13. One day in class, the teacher asked Xiao Ming what Li Shizhen’s book was. Xiao Ming: I don't know his writings, but I know what his last words were before he died. The teacher was curious and asked him what he said. Xiao Ming: Wow, this grass is poisonous...

Recommended

1. You are the landlord of my land.

2. People are like iron, and style is like steel. Don’t pretend to be embarrassed for a day!

3. Face is given by others, but you lose it by yourself.

4. I didn’t have time to participate in your past, and I have no intention of participating in your future.

5. It’s not that I don’t fold quilts. The main reason is that I am nostalgic, that is, I like the quilt I slept on the day before. I am forced to elevate this issue of living habits to the cultivation of character.

6. Once upon a time, a banana fell and turned into an eggplant because it was bruised.

7. Mr. Shi is the best, but unfortunately - in the end he killed all his disciples.

8. When looking at beautiful men on the street, if you look at them with a higher level of appreciation, you are browsing, if you look at them with a lower level of attention, you are a gangster.

9. Pigs have pig thoughts, and people have human thoughts. If a pig has human thoughts, then it is not a pig - it is Bajie!

10. You will feel happy if you are silent for a while, but it will be miserable if you are silent for a while... < /p>

11. Set up a stall...make money...have a wife...give birth to a baby...raise the baby...set up a stall again!

12. The reason for never looking back on love is because you know nothing about it, and the reason for being cautious about love is Because of a little understanding, the reason for rejecting love is because of great enlightenment.

13. Don’t be sad for the old and waste new tears!

14. Nonsense is the first sentence of interpersonal relationships.

15. I really don’t want to do it anymore – because the iron pestle has been ground into an “embroidery needle”.

16. When you see a dime, why bother? Just throw it to the beggar next to you and let him be depressed...

17. I am a pile of dried cows manure.

18. Maybe one day we must be strangers, so please leave all the misfortunes on my shoulders...

19. I am ugly but I am durable! < /p>

20. There is only one reason to move forward, but there are a hundred reasons to retreat. Many people find a hundred reasons all day long to prove that they are not cowards, but never use one reason to prove that they are a warrior.

21. If pigs can fly, who will buy a plane? Just ride a pig into the sky.

22. If my boss doesn’t give me a raise next month, I will resign. Before resigning, I will give him two more Chinese coins and beat him to death.

23. Buying a computer without broadband is like having all the food and wine prepared but becoming a monk before eating.

24. Women use *** to conquer men, and men use *** to conquer banks.

25. For my mother’s birthday, melatonin is better than giving me two large bones to cook and eat, at least it can be used as food and wine.

26. I will definitely not feel anything if I drink a pound of liquor, because I will be dead after drinking half a pound of liquor.

27. You'd better let me kneel on the washboard, I can't stand the electric heater!

28. The one riding the white horse may not be a prince, it may be Tang Monk; the one with wings It doesn’t have to be an angel, it could be a birdman!

29. When it rains, don’t forget to hold an umbrella. If you get wet, gonorrhea will be a problem!

30. Women Use *** to conquer men, and men use *** to conquer banks.

31. The less you read, the more pain you have. The more you read, the less pain you have, until there is no pain at all.

32. If you don’t study hard, if you don’t have enough money in the future, your wife will scold you for being worthless, and you might even run away with a rich man; when your son grows up , and will think you are useless.

33. If you don’t study for China today, you won’t be able to smoke Chinese cigarettes tomorrow.

34. Don’t be afraid of studying, just be afraid that the teacher is uneducated.

35. Study hard and miss your mother every day!

36. Everyone says I am ugly, but in fact I am just not obviously beautiful.

37. When the ugly girl turned back, she scared a cow to death; when the ugly girl turned around twice, the water in the Yellow River waterfall flowed backward; when the ugly girl turned around three times, Tyson switched to playing table tennis!

38. The one riding the white horse may not be a prince, but may be Tang Monk; the one with wings may not be an angel, but may also be a birdman!

39. When it rains, don’t forget to hold an umbrella. You will be wet when you are wet. Gonorrhea is a problem!

40. A hero does not care about the way out, and a rogue does not care about his age!