Who has a joke or story about Children's Day! ! !

Complete works of children's day jokes

Display: Children's Day is coming, and a child comes to the drugstore to buy extra-large condoms. The waitress asked, "Why did you buy this thing?" Child: "Children's Day is coming, and the school organizes performances. I asked the teacher what I could play, and the teacher said I could play with a hammer. . . . "

A little more than him: Mom always pays special attention to Xiao Hao's study. Once, she asked about the result of a math test. "I heard that Lolo got 95 points in this math quiz. How much did you take in the second year of high school? " "I am a little more than him." "Did you get 96 points?" "No, I got 9.5 points."

Wipe it all clean: the baby took the rag and said happily, "Mom, I learned to use the rag!" " ""What did you wipe? "I just wiped the table, toilet and floor with it, and now I'm going to wash the dishes.

Double solution: the teacher said, "one is long and one is short, one is fast and the other is slow." Short people are naturally lazy and long people are busy. Guess what this is? " Tom said, "Mom and Dad."

Ghosts are not terrible: the father asked his son, "Aren't you afraid of ghosts?" "Ghosts have nothing to be afraid of!" The son said, "grandma says you are a troublemaker;" Aunt says you are an alcoholic; Mom often scolds you for being greedy and lazy; Uncle says you are a cheapskate. I'm not afraid to be with you every day. What am I afraid of? "

Waiting for the bus to pass: a child stood by the side of the road with a bottle for a long time, and then the policeman came over and asked him, "Little guy, why are you standing by the side of the road?" "Mom asked me to come out and buy soy sauce," the child said sadly. "She said I couldn't cross the street until the bus passed ..."

Posting couplets: On New Year's Eve, the father led his son to post couplets. He charged: "I stick low, you shout' Gao Sheng'; If it is posted high, you will shout' get rich'. " Stand on the stool, post one, post another. The son looked at it for a long time and said, "Dad, neither promotion nor wealth."

Discussion with chicken: A car driver accidentally ran over a rooster in Xiaoling's house. The driver got off the bus and asked Xiaoling, "Are your parents at home? I ran over your cock and came to pay for it. " "You ran over a rooster, which has nothing to do with my parents. You go to the back of the house and discuss with the hen.