What humorous sentences are there in the chat topic 100?

1, I said I liked Li Bai's poems better, Lu You got angry, and then my family couldn't surf the Internet.

The lost girl finally found her place.

3, people have a plenty of background, I only have a back.

4. The teacher's teaching impressed Xiao Ming deeply, so the next day, he inserted a pair of false teeth.

I wanted to eat my sorrow in one bite, but I became fat in one bite.

6. Dare to curse me for eating instant noodles without seasoning, and I curse you for eating instant noodles with seasoning.

7. Hey, Demo! Call yourself fat and out of breath.

8. The sky is actually colorless. It didn't deceive you, you just deceived yourself with your own eyes.

9, so shameless, so heartless, your weight should be very light.

10, there must be a very important moment every day, which is used to be in a daze.

1 1. Facing hooligans, I am a scholar. In front of literati, I am a rogue.

12. Time flies. It was dark as soon as I got up.

13, the chemistry teacher asked, what about gas leakage? Don't panic, light a cigarette and calm down.

14, you promised not to make me cry, but you fucking smoked me with onions.

15, who hasn't died since ancient times, it's your turn next.

16, be strong, failure is also a part of success, where you fall, where you are wrong.

17, this kind of thing, sleeping, really still sleeps soundly on the school table.

18, each class has a harem, and there are always a few people vying for favor.

19, I think my math scores are very worthy of the math teacher's face value!

Brother, don't let me use my power in Beijing. I don't want to start a blood shed.

2 1, just look at me coldly, don't hit me just because you can't get me.

22. People who turned to ashes can recognize it before, but now they can't recognize it with makeup.

23, don't help me, I'm not drunk, the road ahead will move, help me keep that road.

24. What woman chases a man's interlayer yarn is simply across the Sahara desert.

I like you as much as the sea, but I won't jump into the sea. I can go to Shanghai.

26, you are always, intermittently complacent, continue to eat and die, plan a day, lie in your body for a year.

27. Honey, you must believe me. I'm dizzy when I take a boat, let alone have two feet on both sides.

28. Mom said: How should I treat her in the rebellious period? How did she treat me during menopause?

29. Describe your category, from vertebrates to invertebrates, and finally to molluscs.

30. You are most likely to have a heart attack at the moment when the results are announced.

3 1, people are holding hands, and I am holding my dog to see who is unhappy with a bite.

If I were a princess, I would save a frog, but all I met were toads.

There are two reasons why inviting girls out to play failed. One is that she is too lazy to wash her hair, and the other is that your invitation is not worth washing her hair.

34, poor Nike, Fuadi, rogue Armani.

35. I will study hard next semester and insult those who rank ahead of me.

36. You don't have to be able to do the problem, but the sound of scrolling must be loud.

37. I am not a simple and thrifty person. I am poor.

38. Don't talk about blue thin mushrooms in the future. That's what southerners say. Northerners should have their own personality. Turtle maggots miss oysters.

39. The most worrying thing in the world. I waited for the advertisement for more than 70 seconds and found that I had seen this episode.

40. With so little character, it is shameful to save some flowers and squander.

4 1, a person with few eyebrows can't be friends, so take a photo to prevent it from turning white, because once her eyebrows turn white, they disappear.

42. The most romantic thing I can think of is watching you grow old, and I am still handsome.

43. There are thousands of children in China. If this doesn't work, we'll change it.

44. The happiness of an ostrich is just a pile of sand.

45. People who have been dissatisfied with hairstyles have one thing in common: they refuse to admit that it is a matter of face.

46. Never argue with the same fool, because in the end, you will never know who the fool is.

47. I only trust two people in this world, one is me and the other is not you.

48. I have been looking for a man named Li. I want to avenge my brother, because I hit my brother!

49. I don't know how to describe this feeling now. I just don't want to live anyway. Unless you kiss me.

50. You left without worrying about my feelings. I knew at first sight that you were a difficult dog to keep.

5 1, bad guys need strength, and scum need taste more.

52. Time is for wandering, body is for loving, life is for forgetting, and soul is for singing.

53, planting grass does not make people lie down, it is better to replant cactus!

54. Mixed society is a physical activity, and it pays attention to four lessons: flash and movement.

55, whenever the charge sounded, I quickly hid in the ditch, because: I am undercover!

56. Just like you, at this age, you have fallen below the issue price.

57. You take your overpass and I'll take my underground passage.

58. Why do you feel sleepy when reading? Because books are where dreams begin.

59. Question: Why is summer vacation necessarily longer than winter vacation? Answer: Because it expands with heat and contracts with cold.

60. When I am in a bad mood, I will make harassing calls to others in the middle of the night to wake them up and I will sleep.

6 1, I never hold grudges. I usually report it on the spot.

62, my hobby can be divided into static and dynamic, static is sleeping, dynamic is turning over …

63. Everyone is born primitive. Unfortunately, many people gradually became pirates.

64. What is maturity? Your mother didn't force you, so you put on long pants. What is youth? Your mother forced you, and you still don't wear long pants.

65. I am not a simple and thrifty person. I am poor.

66. When your hair is waist-high, I will open my double knives, run through them and take all the long hair away!

67. Mosquitoes are not hateful. Hatefully, Tang Bohu forgot to give us some mosquito-repellent incense.

68. A girl with thick legs envies all kinds of thin legs, whether he is a man or a woman.

69. When I can't find the long and short sides of the quilt, I feel that the whole person is making Indian cakes.

70. It is said that the more crimes a girl commits in her last life, the bigger her breasts will be in this life.

7 1, the reason why I am not tall is probably because I have been in the mini.

72. My soul is singing and dancing, but my body is on the bed.

73. I have more than 80 kinds of small spicy strips. It's not too late to consider making friends with me.

74. Every time I quarrel with others, I don't know how to scold until I lie in bed.

75. I seem to be allergic to paper, and I feel uncomfortable every time I do my homework.

76. He doesn't care what happens to you. Don't worry, I'm too lazy to talk to you.

77. I mean, why do we always know each other well? So you are especially fond of strangers.

78. From primary school to university, the only constant is a heart that doesn't want to learn.

79. Examination: The difference between an open book and a closed book is that one is copied from the top and the other is copied from the bottom.

80. How to give MM an unforgettable birthday? Beat her up first, and then send the house certificate of the most expensive property in Guangzhou, which will be an unforgettable surprise!

8 1. My wife has been praising me for being horny since she saw some photos of my girlfriend in college.

82. I can't stand this kind of business-the sign says: demolition, give money to sell! I threw her a down jacket, but she refused to sell it. It's too deceiving consumers!

83, handsome has a fart to use! Finally, I was eaten by a chess piece!

84. Don't look for me if you have nothing to do, and don't look for me if you have anything to do.

Angels can fly because they look down on themselves …

86. Hugging is really a strange thing. When we get so close, we can't see each other's faces.

87. I will still look for you in my next life, because besides me, you are the stupidest.

88. When arguing, the difference between a man and a woman is like the difference between a rifle and a machine gun.

89. Grandpa comes from his grandson ...

90. Women have countless QQ numbers just to flirt with a man. Men often use a QQ number to fill in all kinds of women …

9 1, not afraid of enemies like tigers, but afraid of teammates like pigs!

92. A letter is a letter. Don't believe it or not. You still have wechat.

93. What is a bad guy? Men who take off their pants during the day and women who don't take off their makeup at night.

94. I'm not afraid to drink dichlorvos, but I'm afraid there will be surprises when I open the lid. Who should I share an extra bottle with?

95. As an animal, only animals in this world can beat me.

96. Why does God always doze off when I am unlucky?

97. Sometimes, I want to be "full" in my dreams.

98. Take a newspaper to the toilet. I am a scholar.

99. House prices are getting higher and higher, and there are fewer and fewer good men.

100, Meng, remember to put sugar in the soup when you make it for me. I will thank you in the afterlife.