Early recording works of Song Dandan, Huang Hong and Pan Changjiang

New Year's Eve

Character: Brother-in-law and brother-in-law

Brother-in-law: I am a person with a little surname. I am not tall but I have a bad temper. He hit his wife with electric cannon and scolded the old woman one way after another. Ermm has been married for so many years and has never found time to flirt. Whenever I have some free time, I just lean on the mahjong table and forget all the troubles in the world. The silly pillar pulls the millstone and we have to chat seriously. After each round, we have to light a few shots for others. Speaking of my love life, it's a bit embarrassing, especially in my house. It makes people laugh when I show it. You tell me, she sleeps from morning to night and giggles when she sees people. What’s even more annoying is her Dongtou’er brother. He’s not cool at all. He comes here and eats and suffers. After drinking too much wine, he blows the whistle three times and six times, and if he is energetic, he can chatter. The reason why this family was formed was all because of my stupid dad, who was so busy trying to get his grandson in his arms, so my dad became so anxious that he fell into the rabbit hole. You tell me, this person who is looking at me is now in the new year. She is a lonely, prodigal woman who doesn’t do any work. She still has to rely on me. If I don’t take care of her, it will look like I have no tutor. How can I, the young and old, allow her to make trouble with me unreasonably! ? I said damn it! ! !

Sister: I said you took the wrong medicine, or are you pretending to be crazy? This child hasn't even been born yet, but it's his mother. Are you afraid of making people laugh? !

Brother-in-law: Stop... nonsense.

Sister: What?

Brother-in-law: I told you that if you don’t show your head all day long, am you just trying to show off to me?

Sister: Hey! I've been out for a long time, haven't you been watching? Those thin-skinned eyes of yours have been blinded for nothing. Didn't you see what I call my figure?

Brother-in-law: What’s your body shape? He has a very big forehead (because berlou is a Northeastern dialect, so he cannot type these two words, so he can only use pinyin), he doesn’t even have any hair, and he has very thin legs. Look at the two steps you take. It has a small mouthful of cherry that can stuff half of a steamed bun, and it has such a long face that I can touch it for half a night!

Sister: Hey, tell me, you eat like an old sow and sleep like a lazy dog. I have it all in my big belly. You don’t even look at it? It’s not that I, the daughter-in-law, criticizes you. When you speak, you get irritated by needles. You kick and bite at every turn (turning red). You are so stinky that you drop the flagpole. Why are you pretending to be a phoenix? ah? To tell you the truth, in my young mind, you are still a blind bird (qiao’er).

Brother-in-law: Oops? Is your skin a little tight? Don't you want to stay here and go to your mother's place? Are you going to taste my electric cannon again?

Sister: How dare you hit me? (Fear, voice trembling)

Brother-in-law: I don’t dare to hit others, but I dare to hit you. I just hit you, what? (Snoring) Huh? Don't you want to hang out? ah?

Sister: Oh, you are such a nonsense, are you really beating me?

Brother-in-law: I’m going to beat you, come here! What are you doing?

Sister: (crying) Silly brother, why are you dead? Didn't you see that he beat your sister until her waist was stretched, and her whole body was bruised? If you continue to do that nonsense for a while, you should go under the knife, and my life will be wiped out in a while! brother!

Brother-in-law: Hey! I'm here, sister! ...Didn’t I say that you and your wife are in this rabbit trap again?

Brother-in-law: (Flattery) Hahahaha! brother! ?

Brother-in-law: Ah, who is your brother? Can a brother be so careless? I said you kid is too useless. Let me tell you, kid, pay attention. If it weren’t for my sister, today, I would slap you and make you paralyzed! I tell you.

Sister: You’re a good brother, you scold him so hard that he won’t get up.

Brother-in-law: Sister, don’t worry, this is the prologue. There is something else.

Sister: Yeah!

Brother-in-law: Let me tell you, there are others named Young, I’ll tell you. I think you are a little uneasy. If you really beat up my sister, where will you find this yellow girl?

Sister: Brother! (Meaningful) My sister is a flower stuck on a cow dung sign.

(Crying)

Brother-in-law: Sister, don’t cry. Our parents have no backbone. As brothers, we will make the decision for you!

Sister: Yes (crying)

Sister-husband: Humph, brother, don’t you think I’m joking with your sister?

Sister: Can you pull me into this? Are you so playful? It's like fighting with a dog, why should I die?

Brother-in-law: Hey brother, calm down first and let me explain to you slowly.

Brother-in-law: I don’t have time to listen to you and stand stunned. I didn’t know that you, the kid, love to mess around when nothing happens?

Brother-in-law: Brother, don’t be angry yet, listen to me explain to you. Let me think about it. I had a little drink with you. Who knew that your sister was really screaming like crazy? Her voice was very high-pitched, but it was a little out of tune. In a fit of anger, I gave him a few electric cannons. Who knew? If he lies, he doesn't even have a surname...ah, that's just a few.

Brother-in-law: Is this really the case?

Sister: He’s talking nonsense, he didn’t say a word at all. What did you say?

Brother-in-law: (urgent) You, didn’t you look at me and make eye contact with you?

Sister: Why didn’t I see it?

Brother-in-law: Oh...it turns out that this is what happened, and you feel bad for your brother when he comes to have a meal.

I told you that my brother-in-law is greedy for your temper. Okay, if it were me, I would beat him to the point of paralysis.

Sister: (helpless)

Brother-in-law: Then go into the house.

Brother-in-law: OK

Brother-in-law: His sister, his sister? Hurry, put together the dish!

Sister: What are you doing? Nothing?

Brother-in-law: No? How? Then potato shreds, potato slices, potato soup, and potato cubes, aren't there four dishes in one meal?

Sister: When my brother comes, will you give him potatoes? I went and chopped up the little hen.

Brother-in-law: Hey! This is a bit of a gesture!

Brother-in-law: Then brother, let’s drink first?

Brother-in-law: If there’s no food, how about we just do it?

Brother-in-law: Hey! Brother, I am not bragging to you, half a salted duck egg can make me drink half a moon wine.

Brother-in-law: Hey! I really don’t brag to you. I instigated the onions and the problem will be solved.

Brother-in-law: Really? I really don’t want to brag to you. I just instigated my own tongue and solved the problem.

Haha! Come on, brothers, the feelings are deep!

Brother-in-law: I feel bored.

Brother-in-law: I have shallow feelings.

Brother-in-law: Take a lick.

Brother-in-law: No feelings.

Brother-in-law: Give me a face.

Brother-in-law: Do it!

Brother-in-law: Do it!

Brother-in-law: Anyone who doesn’t drink will have two pointed ends and four claws. Lidouer has exactly two eyes.

Brother-in-law: There are flowers on such a big one, so if you have nothing to do, go to the river to spread the sand. Hey, brother-in-law, if you say that train thing is really fast, it can go so fast while crawling. How fast would it be if it stood up?

Brother-in-law: Let me tell you, that’s not fast. Wire transfer is faster than that!

Brother-in-law: Wire transfer by wire

Brother-in-law: Wire transfer.

Brother-in-law: What is a wire transfer?

Brother-in-law: Just use email.

Brother-in-law: Ah! ! ! Can I still send things by phone?

Brother-in-law: Yeah!

Brother-in-law: Then tell me how fast wire transfer is.

Brother-in-law: Oops! That's quick. Let me tell you. Just once, my brother was working in Hainan Island. When it was over, he asked my mother to make him a pair of cloth shoes and mail them to him. It's done. I heard that wire transfers are fast, so my dad wrapped the shoes with cloth and hung them on the telephone pole. But after hanging them, my dad looked at them and saw that they didn't move. Don't tell me, my dad. Not a tiger, but a treacherous one! Guess it means there was no call. My dad went back to the house. The old man didn't sleep well that night. I'm just afraid that my son won't be able to accept it! The old man got up early the next morning and saw that the small bag was still hanging on the telephone pole. My dad thought: must I have written it in the wrong place? When he took the bag off and took a look, the old man was happy. There was a pair of old shoes inside. How fast do you think wire transfer is? Put on new shoes, old shoes are mailed back!

Brother-in-law: Hey, brother-in-law.

Didn't I ask someone to change it?

Brother-in-law: You can pull it and change it. We, young and old, have been raped for generations. How does it look like your old Wu family - the Little Tigers?

Brother-in-law: Hey, brother-in-law, do you remember that time...

Brother-in-law: Which time?

Brother-in-law: Just that time. Someone is going to buy oil. But who would have thought that he would go to a tavern to drink secretly on the way. He was so drunk that he stumbled over and dropped the oil drum, but he picked up such a big piece of dirt and stuck it in the back rack of the car and went home. After he came back, he was beaten up by my sister. Dun, do you think you can drink this wine?

Brother-in-law: Huh! Anyway, I remember there was a man who was drinking and drinking, saying he wanted convenience, but it turned out that convenience was over. He couldn't move even though he tried hard. In the end, he found out that he had tied the tree to the tree with his belt. ! Who don't know? snort! )

Brother-in-law: Hey, brother-in-law, we’ve been drinking for a long time, why doesn’t the chicken come? Is this possible? Are you kidding me?

Brother-in-law: Wait a moment? I'll say hi to you. His sister. His sister! Do you listen? Serve the chicken!

Sister: Here we come! This chase, this chase!

Brother-in-law: Hey, I said this chicken is really not small, bigger than a quail!

Brother-in-law: Hey! Don't move your chopsticks yet!

Brother-in-law: Don’t move your chopsticks. Does this thing look like a baby?

Brother-in-law: Hey! Don’t you understand this? We have to decide whether it’s the popular way to eat it, the ethnic way to eat it, or the Bel Canto way to eat it.

Sister: How to eat it? Whoever eats is full.

Brother-in-law: What do you think is the best way to eat it?

Brother-in-law: Of course it’s Bel Canto! It’s delicious!

Brother-in-law: Then come to Bel Canto.

Brother-in-law: But we have to agree, and we have to name every part of the chicken.

Brother-in-law: That’s easy to say. I'll take this chicken head first!

Brother-in-law: Chicken head? Why! Wait a moment, you wait a moment. This is called a dragon head! Ah, you called me wrong. This dragon head belongs to me.

Brother-in-law: Then I’ll have the chicken neck again!

Brother-in-law: Wait a moment, wait a moment. This is called Phoenix Terrier, let me tell you!

Sister: I’m in trouble with this phoenix stalk.

Brother-in-law: (swallowing) Feng Ge, you have suffered a lot. Then I'll do this breast again.

Brother-in-law: Hey! Just wait a moment! That's not called breasts, that's called forward thrusting, let me tell you! Well, you all called it wrong, I can beat it.

Brother-in-law: No, I said you both had almost eaten, so you left me a chicken butt?

Brother-in-law: Hey, what a chicken butt! The civilized word is called Youhuluer!

Sister: Give me the gourd and eat it.

Brother-in-law: (shouting loudly) Ah! What are you doing? Is this bullying me? I haven’t done anything yet. I took a look and the chick was gone.

Brother-in-law: Brother, calm down first. Aren’t we just joking? Come, let's drink.

Brother-in-law: The east wind blows, the war drums beat, whoever is afraid of drinking.

Sister: Drinking has ruined the party style, ruined the stomach, and the organization that drank has no funds.

Brother-in-law: Oh? So, let’s drink in a civilized way. How about poetry? Those who are compatible drink and eat food, while those who are not compatible go to the ground to serve food.

Sister: Right, what are you talking about.

Brother-in-law: OK! Listen up! From a distance, the city wall looks jagged.

Brother-in-law: Look closely at the teeth of the city wall.

Brother-in-law: The more you look at the city wall, the more jagged it becomes.

Brother-in-law: The more I look at the city wall, the more the moon keeps sawing... teeth.

Sister: That’s right, brother!

Brother-in-law: Hey, brother, that’s okay. But how many books do you have to read?

Brother-in-law: Look! I still have the books from elementary school!

Brother-in-law: Brother, how many years have you studied?

Brother-in-law: Let me tell you, it’s really hard to calculate. Let me count them for you! I studied for two years in the first grade of elementary school, three years in the second grade, four years in the third grade, and five years in the fourth grade...

Brother-in-law: Did you study in the fifth grade? Six years, right?

Brother-in-law: No, the school let me go home even after six years.

Brother-in-law: Why?

Brother-in-law: Because the school said I was too old, I had a fight with the female teacher.

Brother-in-law: You said this school was cheating people, but you said it was a waste of... talent.

Brother-in-law: But I didn’t throw away the books after I got home.

Brother-in-law: What books do you often read?

Brother-in-law: I am generally willing to read some historical books. I drank wine with Concubine Yang, jumped over thunderbolts with Su Sanqi and Cui Yingying, admired flowers with Sister Yang, and ate crabs with Widow Ma!

Brother-in-law: I think you are a little mentally disturbed. You have forgotten your last name. Your errand boy is lovesick, and your speech is not coherent at all.

Sister: I see that neither of you is too humble. We are not allowed to serve the wine.

As soon as you raise your neck, we will drink it. Whoever doesn’t will follow? It’s all for nothing

Let him wear this piece of human skin! Dry!

Brother-in-law: Come and do it!

Brother-in-law: Do it!

Sister: Oops! oops! No more.

Brother-in-law: What happened?

Brother-in-law: What’s wrong, sister?

Sister: Oops! But it doesn’t work anymore. My belly seems to be in danger. If I don’t get it right, I might have a miscarriage!

Brother-in-law: Miscarriage? I'm telling you that's not possible! No matter what you think of, you have to hold on, hold on!

Brother-in-law: No, I mean brother-in-law, does my sister have a stomachache?

Brother-in-law: Hey, let me tell you, are you having a stomachache?

Sister: Oh, it can’t be done. Take me to the hospital quickly!

Brother-in-law: You said that these old ladies are really prodigal. It’s just you and your wine. Why are you having a miscarriage?

You said. Let's go!

Sister: Oh, you are carrying me!

Brother-in-law: Hey, I’m still carrying you. With my small body, can I carry you? If you understand, you have to help me a little, or else I won't go with you!

Brother-in-law: Yes! Sister, you have to support him a little. Ah yes! Just mix it up. Do it well!

Brother-in-law: Brother, let’s talk ugly things first. Don’t eat all the food and wine.

Leave some for me!

Brother-in-law: Don’t worry! I can keep it for you. Walk slowly, walk slowly! They've left, so it's time for me to leave too.

It doesn't matter whether the food or drinks are hot or cold, just make some more! …………What? Did I drink too much?

I don’t have much! Can I still see this house wandering around after I drink too much?

The tape is really hard to find! Just read the text and recall it!