Are there any jokes that can make people laugh?

After reading 1, everyone died laughing. Today is my birthday. My girlfriend called early to say that she would come home at night to celebrate my birthday and give me a surprise! Hear the good news! I worked hard today and ran a dozen customers! Back to the company. It is three o'clock in the afternoon. When I went to the canteen, I found only one miserable dish and one soup, three beans fried with meat (fried soybeans, green beans and peas) and radish soup. No way, after running all morning, the customer's stomach was growling, so he had to order a big plate of fried three beans with meat and a big pot of radish soup to eat! Unexpectedly, after work, my stomach is like the engine of a cross-country jeep! -The intense piston movement started! In a flash, puffs of gas rushed out of my body! I rushed to a place where no one was there, and my stomach began to sing softly in embarrassment, but immediately it became a rapid-fire puff! My stomach is so swollen! Just then, my girlfriend called and said that she had arrived home, and asked me to go home quickly. Alas! I have no choice but to go home. I hope she won't see my embarrassment! ..... On the way home, I deliberately tried to fart a lot. Almost home, my stomach feels much better. I think there should be no more problems. I saw my girlfriend waiting at the door from a distance. She looks a little excited. She shouted, "honey, I have prepared a wonderful gift for you tonight, which will definitely surprise you." Before entering the door, my girlfriend covered my eyes tightly with a piece of cloth and said that she would give me a surprise! He took me to a chair in front of the dining table and made me swear not to peek. Suddenly, I want to fart again. Just then, my girlfriend's cell phone rang. This saved my life! I made an excuse that it was too messy and asked her to answer the phone in the other room! She insisted that I couldn't open the blindfold and made me swear! Then I ran to the other room to answer the phone. As soon as she left, I seized the opportunity, put all my weight on one leg and let my fart out. This fart not only rings, but also smells like rotten eggs. I could hardly breathe, so I touched the chair cushion and fanned it hard to get rid of the bad smell. Just when my mood improved, another fart came again. I raised my leg again and started to release it! It sounds like the rapid rotation of a diesel engine, and the smell is even worse this time. In order not to suffocate myself, I fanned the chair cushion with my arm, hoping that the smell would dissipate as soon as possible. When everything is about to return to normal, another fart can't wait to come. So I stood up, bent down, pursed my ass and leaned back! Let it out. This fart is really first-class Even the newspaper behind me was blown to the ground in 1998 in ............ I listened to my girlfriend's voice in the other room. I dare not open the blindfold because I have to keep my promise not to peek. I can only keep farting in the dark, in order to quickly discharge all the gas in my stomach without making the room more smelly! I unbuttoned my trousers, took off my underwear and pants below my stomach, exposed my ass, groped for the door of the balcony behind me, almost extended my whole ass to the balcony, and began to fart wildly ..., ah! Much better! After that, I danced and fanned the chair cushions all over the room, praying that the stench would dissipate quickly ... In this way, I kept farting and fanning the chair cushions for the next ten minutes. Finally, when I heard her say goodbye on the phone, the air in the room and my stomach were much better! I quickly tied my pants and arranged my hair, and began to wait for my dear girl to give me an elegant smile. When she approached, I had a satisfied smile and warm eyes on my face. My girlfriend first apologized for taking so long to call me, and then asked me if I had secretly opened the cloth. After I assured her that I didn't peek, my girlfriend took off the cloth that covered my eyes and said to me, "What a surprise! My girlfriend insisted that I bring them to see you today. They say you are very graceful and handsome in the photo! Here! You see, the five people sitting at the table are my good sisters, and the six people standing on the balcony are my best friends at school! " At this time, I was extremely shocked and horrified to find that there were a lot of girls sitting on the table opposite me, while there was another pile standing on the balcony behind me. They all came to this birthday party that surprised me very much. Now, every one of them looks at me with an indescribable expression on his face, just like finding a Martian. ...................................................................................................................................................... friend: Why are your pants wet? Ge You: It has been like this ever since I became famous. Friend: Often? Ge You: Yes! It is often that the people next to him suddenly turn around and shout, "Isn't this Ge You?" A woman was walking at night when she suddenly saw a man coming towards her with open arms, gave a hug and stepped forward. The man fell to the ground crying and said, it's the third piece. Who did I piss off? Is it so difficult to take a piece of glass home? Follow-up: I have seen it before. Did you answer: Chinese in primary schools is too difficult now. Look at one of their homework questions: Requirements: Connect the following four sentences with related words: 1, Zhang Haidi's sister is paralyzed; 2. Sister Zhang Haidi studied tenaciously; 3. Sister Zhang Haidi learned a lot of foreign languages; 4. Sister Zhang Haidi studied acupuncture. (Note: The correct answer should be: Sister Zhang Haidi, although paralyzed, studied hard, not only learning many foreign languages, but also learning acupuncture. As a result, one child wrote: Although Zhang Haidi's sister stubbornly studied acupuncture and many foreign languages, she was still paralyzed. Later, a more fierce child wrote: Sister Zhang Haidi not only learned a foreign language, but also learned acupuncture. She studied so doggedly that she was finally paralyzed. Sister Zhang Haidi is paralyzed, because she studies hard, not only learning a lot of foreign languages, but also learning acupuncture. Sister Zhang Haidi studied very tenaciously, not only learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture, but also learned paralysis at last. Sister Zhang Haidi learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture, and was paralyzed by tenacious study. Sister Zhang Haidi learned a lot of foreign languages and acupuncture through tenacious study. As a result, she paralyzed herself according to the foreign version of an acupuncture book. Subject: When ... During ... Child: He undressed while putting on pants. Teacher's comment: Is he going to take off his clothes? Still have to wear it? 2. Topic: Among children: One of my left feet was injured. Teacher's comment: Are you a centipede? 3. Topic: Children: After work, Dad goes home one after another. Teacher's comment: How many dads do you have? 4. Topic: Sad child: There is a ditch in front of my house, which is really sad. Teacher's comment: The teacher is sad. 5. Topic: Another child: My mother is short, tall, fat and thin. Teacher's comment: Is your mother a deformed diamond? 6. Topic: Babysitting: What are you looking at? Never seen it? Teacher's comment: Don't procrastinate too much. 7. Title: Xinxin writes to Rong children: bustling confession. Teacher's comment: Don't watch too many series! 8. title: delicious children write: delicious fart. Teacher: ... 9. Title: Naive children write: It's really hot today. Teacher's comment: You are so naive 10. Title: Sure enough, the children said: I ate fruit yesterday. Then I drank cold water. Teacher's comment: it's a phrase, which can't be separated. 1 1. Teacher's comment: ................. 12. Topic: Besides, children: A train passes by, besides, the teacher's comment: I'll forget it if I die.