Practice eloquence jokes

Think it over. With mental preparation and the formation of expression ideas, you will not be nervous and will not screw up the articles of association. Good eloquence needs to accumulate over time. The following is a passage I compiled for you about practicing eloquence. I hope you like it.

Duanzi 1

The young man cried to the master: master, I failed in the college entrance examination, and I couldn't go to college. My parents scolded me and my girlfriend left me. Please accept me and convert me to Buddhism! ? Seeing that the master took out a stack of college entrance examination materials, the young man suddenly realized: Didn't the master tell me not to give up the college entrance examination and fight again next year? Master shook his head and said, benefactor, we only recruit undergraduates or above, so you'd better come back for an interview when you get into the undergraduate program! ?

Duanzi 2

You can't afford to buy fresh fruit today, so save money to buy it in a few days. Rotten fruit bought cheaply is a burden, garbage. It will never bring you any happiness. If you can't get it now, just wait for it. Life is only a few decades, so don't make do with love and food. Your heart and stomach are small. Don't owe them.

Duanzi No.3

I bought an e-cigarette recently, and it feels good. I stuffed it into my jeans pocket when I went out to take the bus yesterday. Maybe the jeans are too tight on the switch. The whole carriage saw that my crotch was smoking all the time. I was still concentrating on my mobile phone and didn't notice it until a kind friend patted me. Dude, you look great.

Duanzi no.4

When I was a child, my mother told me more than once that a kiss would get me pregnant. As a result, my cat jumped up and grabbed the meat and kissed me on the mouth. A few months later, out of a sense of responsibility, it gave birth to three kittens. If I had a bite of meat, I wouldn't let those three kittens be vegetarian!

Duanzi no.5

It is said that when a daughter finds a boyfriend, her parents will feel sad that the cabbage they have worked so hard to grow has been arched by a pig. But since my brother found a girlfriend, he didn't even come back to live at home. Every day his mother-in-law cooks good food for him, and he is full of happiness. Mom 45? The horn looked up at the sky and said, I wonder if the cabbage is arched. Anyway, the pig that has been raised for more than 20 years must have been lost. . . ?

Duanzi no.6

Liu Er, a macaque, came to the Western Heaven to learn Buddhist scriptures. Only Tang Priest can tell the true from the false. The Tang Priest said:? I want to eat peaches for my teacher. ? The two monkeys hesitated and turned into peaches. Suddenly the Tang Priest shouted:? Bajie, give it to me

Take that kiwi! ?

Duanzi no.7

Security guard: What's it for? Me: I want to go to the roof. Security guard: Don't pretend, just tell me how much you lost. Me: fifty thousand. . . Security guard: line up in the lobby on the first floor and hit the post! Me: Why? Security: You can only go to the second floor, 200,000 on the third floor, 300,000 on the fourth floor, 400,000 on the fifth floor and 654.38 on the sixth floor. The VIP on the roof is a big family. What are you doing?

Duanzi no.8

When I was a child, I did my homework at home, and suddenly the power went out, yeah yeah yeah! Finally, I don't have to do my homework, so I can watch TV. I especially turned on the TV. In a dark corner, my dad said simply: Ugliness is bad enough, and it's so stupid!

Duanzi No.9

I went to the business hall to get the card and asked the salesperson? What's so good about this 4g girl? Uncle, 2g can watch Kong novels, 3g can watch Kong pictures and 4g can watch Kong videos. ? I said, girl, you can say something that uncle doesn't understand. Please give me a 4g card.

Duanzi 10

A beautiful woman in the office just started work on the first day after maternity leave. A male colleague quickly made a cup of coffee and served it to a beautiful woman. The beauty was favored and said: I am breastfeeding and can't drink coffee! Male colleague: Who told you to drink? Let you add some milk.

Duanzi 1 1

I'm a courier, I have something to say! The girl paper that lives on the 7th floor of No.2 compound, you have always indicated on the list: Please deliver the goods to my pregnant women. I've been delivering goods to your door for a whole year, and I just want to ask you: Are you pregnant with Nezha? !

Duanzi 12

A lady met in the trading hall. She said: The China stock market is a bit like an incompetent husband. Let's abandon him, a little reluctant; Stay together every day and suffer indignities; Eat and drink well and serve him. I hope he can take some sunshine as his spirit. I just saw his erection, and he hasn't finished taking off his clothes. I'm dying. The key is that as soon as you get dressed and are ready to have an affair, he pulls you back and says, there is a reaction, there is a reaction, you wait!

Duanzi 13

A beautiful woman just took a taxi and let out a loud fart with a bang, which made her very embarrassed. At this moment, the driver took a cigarette and said slowly: Is fart the food you eat or the unyielding cry of the dead? The beauty smiled, and the embarrassment disappeared. She said, Master, are you a literary fan? The master shook his head and said, but the cry was so loud that I thought I had a flat tire! ! ! ? [Haha]

Duanzi 14

Xiaoming's mother was making a mask when the doorbell rang. Mom said to Xiaoming: Xiaoming answers the door, and mom is wearing a mask. Xiao Ming answered the door after listening. So it's dad. Dad asked Xiao Ming, where is your mother? She is doing something shameful!

Duanzi 15

A man asked: If the rope broke during bungee jumping and you were about to fall off the cliff, what would you say if you were asked to say only three words? Someone replied: help me, grass mud horse, I'm dying. . . Something like that At this time, a great god silently replied: somersault cloud. . . Spike the audience!

Duanzi 16

Going out shopping, I saw a classmate I hadn't seen for years and a woman with a child in her arms. Me: Fuck, when did you get married? The children are so old that they really look like your children. They look a little embarrassed and flustered. The classmate just laughed a few times and left his phone number. I said, go, I have something to do, too. Classmate: OK, call. I just turned around and took a few steps when I heard the woman say.

Duanzi 17

My daughter-in-law received a courier this morning and was anxious to open it. As soon as she got home, she was looking for blades and scissors again! ? I said: What you bought is so exciting? My daughter-in-law said without looking up. you do not get it , do you? We women unpack express delivery, just like you men tear women's stockings, knowing what's inside, but still can't stop! ? Well, I suddenly understand. . .

Duanzi 18

When I was shopping in the vegetable market, I saw a girl picking cucumbers seriously. The vegetable seller said enthusiastically, girl, are you eating or using? The girl blushed and said, use. Aunt said: hey, this is good, thick and strong. The girl blushed and said, I used it to apply my face! Aunt said innocently, I didn't mean anything else. Your face is so big that you can't cover it with thin slices!

Duanzi 19

At the class reunion, we had an honest adventure together. A friend asked his girlfriend. Have you ever been hit by a car? The girlfriend replied yes. I thought to myself that my girlfriend really gave me face and didn't expose me without a car in front of my classmates.

Duanzi 20

The first time I went to my girlfriend's house, when I was eating, my second-rate girlfriend kept praising her mother's cooking, and I smiled and echoed how delicious all kinds of dishes were. Suddenly my girlfriend said:? Do you know how my mother tied my father at home? I was absent-minded, so I opened my mouth and said, with a dog chain?

Recommendations for practicing eloquence:

1. Humorous jokes about eloquence training

2. Practice humorous and eloquent sentences

3. Training methods to improve humorous eloquence

4. Speech is commonly used in eloquence training

5. 10 Practice short stories that must be read.