5 funny jokes.

1, quiet office, the leader suddenly farted. I saw the opportunity to perform. In order not to embarrass the leader, I stood up voluntarily: "I'm sorry, I let the leader go." I ate too many soybeans in the morning. " The leader smiled: "You don't have to go to work tomorrow. You said you had nothing to pack. There are only two of us in this office. "

On New Year's Eve, Lao Xu took his little son to put up couplets. He said to his son: "I posted low, and you called for a promotion;" If I hold high, you shout wealth. " He stood on a stool and set up a bar. Go and post another one. The son turned a blind eye, took a long look, and finally said, "Dad, neither promotion nor wealth."

The teacher asked the students to make sentences with "skimming flowers". A student didn't understand the meaning of this word, so he wrote: "A friend of mine can make sentences with' skimming flowers'. A few days later, the students got their exercise books back, only to see the teacher praising them at the back: "So, can you do it yourself?" "

4. Math teacher: "A banana, three children want to grab it. The result was robbed by two children and divided. You know there are 1 children, what do you get? " Student: "banana peel."

The daughter asked her mother, "Why don't you buy a motorcycle?" Mother replied, "I have no money and can't afford it." The daughter said, "When I grow up and earn money, I will buy you a motorcycle, and then you can take me to kindergarten by motorcycle."

6. A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by. A policeman came over and asked, What's the matter? Drunk: I don't know. I just arrived.

7. As soon as a first-grade child returned to the classroom, he told the teacher, "Teacher, there are many ants in the toilet!" The female teacher nodded and suddenly thought that she had taught the word ant in English at the beginning of school. To see if the children remembered it, she asked, "What did the ant say?" The child looked blank and answered after a while: "ant, it, it didn't speak!" " "

8. Teacher: "As we all know, how to explain it?" Student: "Every cup has a mouth, which means every cup has a mouth, such as a wine glass and a teacup."

9. Mom doesn't want to cook, but she has to do homework with her son. Unexpectedly, my son has to accompany his father. Mom said unhappily, "What, mom doesn't have dad's guidance?" The son shook his head and said, "Dad has many freckles on his face. He can help with the arithmetic."

10, Dad told the children the story of being poor and often starving when he was a child. After listening to the story, my little daughter had tears in her eyes, and the cake in her hand was only half eaten. She said to her father with great sympathy, "Oh, Dad, I see. You came to our house because you didn't eat, did you? "