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How to avoid falling into social embarrassment by doing human affairs instead of "human affairs"
HR work is easy to offend people, and it is already a common knowledge in the industry. An HR veteran said with a smile, "Do things for people, not people!" Although it is a joke, it is enough to show the social dilemma of HR.
A-Dai asked this HR veteran for advice and summarized 4 common sense of social interaction to provide everyone with a reference.
Some scientists have shown that there is a golden distance in social interactions.
Within this distance, we can interact with others freely and comfortably. If we exceed this distance, discomfort, embarrassment, anxiety and other uneasy emotions will attack us. Do you understand this golden distance? In your social activities, are you aware of the importance of golden distance?
It is easy for HR to fall into a misunderstanding, thinking that as long as you are enthusiastic enough, even friends you meet for the first time will be treated as warmly as you would treat a close friend you have known for many years. However, under the enthusiasm, you will unknowingly violate Social distance from others.
The distance between us and our work partners and customers should be kept at 0.5 -1.5 meters. This is the golden distance in social life. Once the distance between you is less than 0.5 meters, it is easy to be embarrassed, such as the breath or even the slightest breath. The "little raindrops" will rush towards you. If the distance between the two parties is kept at 0.5-1.5 meters, it is most suitable to reach out and hold the other person's hand without easily touching the other person's body.
Eye contact is very important in interpersonal communication. It can reveal the mentality, relationship, and even subtle psychological changes of two people.
When the person you are talking to avoids looking at you, it means that he does not want you to see his mental activities; when he looks at you with wide eyes, he is very interested in it; if his eyes flicker, it means that he is very interested in you. It may indicate mental instability or dishonesty; also, if he is unwilling to make eye contact, he may be hiding something or feeling guilty.
When dealing with people in different relationships, the positions where the eyes stay are also different. When you are communicating with colleagues, your gaze should stay in the triangular area between your eyes and mouth, which makes people feel very comfortable. This is a common gaze communication position in social situations; when you are communicating with an interviewer, your gaze should stay on the forehead of the other person. A triangular area, this kind of gaze can make the atmosphere serious and make the other party feel formal.
A person's words and deeds can reflect his personality. If you understand these code words of sitting posture, you will know how to communicate in the appropriate way.
1) Like to shake their legs: Most of these people are smart, quick to react, and have strong receptivity, but they are not very patient. They have an impetuous or anxious side in their hearts, and sometimes they don’t feel stable enough. When HR communicates with this kind of people, they basically say what they say and get to the point.
2) Sitting upright in the front half of the chair: This kind of person is generally introverted, modest and polite, good at listening and considerate of others. They are mostly sexually mature, approachable, and easily trusted by others. HR should be more enthusiastic when talking to such people to set up a communication atmosphere.
3) With your chest close to the table and your legs together: This posture makes you look introverted, reserved, shy, and not confident enough. Most of these people are not decisive and lack flexibility. HR should be careful when talking to such people to avoid hurting their self-esteem through inappropriate language.
4) Cross-legged: Such people are usually carefree and casual, sometimes a little arrogant, like to be picky, like to point fingers at other people's affairs, and like to give advice. HR needs to be more tactful when talking to this kind of people to avoid falling off the topic due to imprecision.
Have you discovered that different speaking speeds represent different emotions?
Everyone must have had this experience. When I gave a speech for the first time, I originally prepared a 5-minute speech, but it was finished in 3 minutes. The reason is that nervousness can speed up people's speech. When you are giving a speech, you don't dare to face the audience in the audience, and you want to end the speech quickly, so you will unconsciously speed up your speech to free yourself.
Also, if a person who has always been eloquent suddenly becomes hesitant, it may be that he is hiding something from you, which requires attention. There are many cases about the relationship between speaking speed and emotion, so I won’t list them all here. If you are interested, you can leave a message to Dumb.
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