Achieve a better self.

Think about whether there are such people around us. In the hilarity of a group of people, he was silent, as if he lacked courage and confidence, and it was difficult to integrate into the circle. And you can't help feeling sorry for him when you see him shrinking on the edge. Some people will look at it contemptuously, as if he were a weak man.

For those who seem to be unsociable, we will always stay away from him, isolate him and be proud of our gregarious.

But in fact, that lone ranger is not weak and doesn't need your sympathy. They became powerful in a special way.

Mr. Lu Xun once said: "All animals walk alone, only sheep live." Who is the beast? Introverts with the following three characteristics can achieve great things.

Even if you are a person with a good personal relationship, I suggest you do these three things well and achieve a better self.

First, I seldom attend boring chats and parties.

In our company office, people often chat, and the topics are nothing more than children's academic performance, who has several houses at home, and the glorious deeds of outstanding relatives. These things around us, once stopped, are hard to stop. You are talking to me, and it is very lively.

Whenever everyone is talking in full swing, a colleague keeps silent, lowers his head and occasionally looks up at the person chatting, looking like he has nothing to do with himself and seems out of place.

This is probably the appearance of unsociable. Obviously living in the same space and environment, but often not on the same channel with the people around. After my observation, this unsociable colleague not only does not participate in chatting, but also has many special places.

For example, she has a high degree, is a graduate student, and loves reading. Others chat and she reads. I have read the jokes she posted in her circle of friends, with fresh words, clear logic and far-reaching significance. She doesn't talk much, but the leader gives her all the important things. She not only goes to work, but also runs her own sideline, and her income can catch up with the executives in the company.

This seemingly unsociable person is unsociable because she is not the same person as the people around her. She knew that different ways wouldn't work, and she didn't lower her demands on herself in order to fit in.

This colleague is my type. Sometimes when I talk to her, I realize that she is reading books and absorbing new knowledge every day. I can't help giving her a thumbs-up. Compared with her, those who chat at work have been at work for several years, living a repetitive life without realizing it.

There is no good or bad personality, but we live in a group, so we should always feel ourselves, know ourselves and control ourselves. Don't lose yourself in order to participate in the excitement. Being unsociable is actually nothing.

Everyone has played Tetris. When a whole line is a square, it will disappear instantly. When we are gregarious, we easily disappear.

Excellent people, they don't deliberately break away from the group, but know themselves clearly and know what they want.

Even if you are a person with a good personal relationship, I suggest you do these three things well and achieve a better self.

Second, introverted, like to be alone, keen on deep learning.

Throughout the ages, people who have left academic works and contributions to the world are devoted to research and work, and sometimes even isolated from the world.

During a trip to India, carl jung, a psychologist, came across the local people's custom of setting up meditation rooms at home. After that, Jung had the idea of building a private office. 1922, he built a simple two-story stone tower by the lake in a small village in Berlin. "When I am in the lounge, I can be alone," Jung described the room. In order to keep the privacy of his work, he does not accept any visitors who have not made an appointment in advance.

Coincidentally, Japanese neuropsychologist Zi Yuan mentioned many times in his book that he should be absolutely free and quiet when working in his study at home, and even his wife could not enter the room without his permission.

These great scholars must give themselves space and time to be alone and cut off from the outside world, because they need to do in-depth work.

Why do we need to do in-depth work?

Scholars put forward that deep work refers to focusing on professional activities without interference, so that personal cognitive ability reaches the limit. Many years' research in neuroscience has also found that mental stress accompanied by deep work can improve personal ability quickly and efficiently.

In other words, working deeply when you are alone greatly improves work efficiency and is easy to succeed.

I personally have this experience. When you are alone, you can concentrate on reading and studying, and your learning efficiency is very high, and your body and mind are more pleasant.

On the contrary, those who mix with many people every day can't feel this feeling, and it is difficult for them to have the opportunity to go deep into their work, and of course it is difficult to achieve substantive results.

Even if you are a person with a good personal relationship, I suggest you do these three things well and achieve a better self.

Third, make big moves at critical moments to solve practical problems.

Donnie, the protagonist in the movie Iron Man, is a great genius and a very unsociable person. He doesn't talk much, but he is crazy. The American government asked him to use his talents to serve the country and make military weapons for the country, but he refused.

Downey, who proudly said "I am the savior of the earth" at the press conference, often shuts himself in the basement of his home and does not allow others to enter.

What does he do? Yes, he and his robot work together to study the energy improvement of the steel suit, optimize the control program, improve the flight control accuracy, and make the steel suit he invented better. Even his girlfriend and assistant Pepper couldn't figure out what he was doing.

In Iron Man 3, when desperate soldiers almost cornered Downey, Downey summoned the Iron Man team in his basement, and everyone could fight independently and obey Downey's orders. Donnie's friend Lieutenant Colonel Rhodes said in surprise, "So you're in the basement, doing this."

Finally, his Iron Man team successfully annihilated all the desperate soldiers and protected the American people.

Of course, movies are imaginative. However, every excellent person, usually a person who seldom speaks harsh words, can always make big moves and solve problems at critical moments.

Nobel, a Swedish chemist, was introverted and taciturn since childhood. However, he has incomparable perseverance and determination. He followed his father to the factory to do explosive experiments since childhood, and his childhood was always accompanied by boring explosions. Introversion gave him the advantage of studying hard, made breakthrough research results in the field of blasting and completed the accumulation of huge wealth. The key measure of the Nobel Prize he founded is "innovation".

A psychologist's research shows: "Introverts are naturally good at focusing on their inner spiritual world, which gives them superb insight and understanding. They are good at sorting out and absorbing external information and turning it into their own content instead of simply accepting or denying it. "

Therefore, when faced with problems, introverts can often think independently without interference, find out the causes of the problems and solve them.

Even if you are a person with a good personal relationship, I suggest you do these three things well and achieve a better self.

To sum up, I think we can change our judgment on unsociable introverts a little. People who are out of the crowd are not weak, on the contrary, they are closer to the strong. Introverts focus on their inner spirit, have stronger concentration and perseverance, and are more likely to make achievements in their own fields.

So, look around you. If there is an introvert, you should be careful. He may be an energy source, a smart guy who wakes up drunk alone. And we should always keep our own characteristics and judgments in the group, even if we are integrated, don't lose ourselves.