Girlfriend is unhappy. What jokes should I tell her to make her feel better?

1, a male deer, it goes faster and faster, and finally becomes a highway (deer)! ! ! !

2. Two tomatoes cross the road, a car flies by, one of them can't escape and is squashed, and the other tomato points to the squashed tomato and laughs: dig hahaha, ketchup …

The wolf said, "I will eat you!" ! ! "Guess what?

As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.

4. There is a duck named Xiao Huang. One day, he was hit by a car. He shouted, "Gung!" From then on, he became a cucumber! !

The matchstick suddenly felt itchy, so I reached out and scratched it, and I burned myself to death …

6. One day, Xiao Qiang asked his father, "Dad, am I a stupid child?" Dad said, "Silly boy, how can you be a silly boy?"

7. A medium-rare steak and a medium-rare steak meet in the street. Why don't they say hello? (assuming they can talk) because .......................................................................................................................................................................

8. Question: How to make sparrows quiet?

Answer: Click.

Reason: Silence (silence).

9. Wang, the host of Happy Dictionary, interviewed a program audience and asked, "Who is your favorite hostess?" The audience said, "It's you." Wang asked, "Why do you say that?" The audience said, "Because you look a bit like Yang Lan!"

10, I hate two kinds of people:

First, there is racial discrimination;

The second is black;

Third, I can't count!

1 1, winter is coming, and I decided to keep the habit of taking a cold bath, but after washing, I found myself a child again! ! !

12, there is a fat man.

Jump off the top of the twentieth floor. ...

It turned out to be .....

Fat man! !

Who is the ancestor of mankind?

It's a flower ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ because ~ ~ ~ ~ peanuts are "human" ~ ~ ~

14, who was a white-collar worker in ancient times?

Meng Mu's Three Movements (Thousands)

15, Zhang Fei: "Stop the old thief!"

Yan Yan: "Ring-eyed thief! Dismount and die! "

Police car: "Listen, two thieves ~ ~ ~ You are surrounded ~ ~ ~ Drop your weapons ..."

16. How did the ants die after falling from the Himalayas?

Answer: I am starving. It takes a long time to float down because it is too light ...,,,,