Line of the sketch "Who is Yang Guifei". . . . . . urgently needed

Fang Fang: Hey~ It’s the Year of the Snake and it’s early Spring Festival. Let me say hello to everyone! Look here, it’s an advertisement: Recruiting a noble concubine. In fact, as soon as the Chinese New Year comes, all the people on the crew have gone home for the New Year. Now I am the only one left on the crew. It is not so easy to find an actor. So for the role of the imperial concubine, the director will have to find me sooner or later. Hey, ripped it.

Jia Ling: Wait! Hahaha, I saw that this role was prepared for me.

Fang Fang: Oh, it looks familiar.

Jia Ling: OK, I know who you are, you are my fan! Come on, I’ll sign your name. OK, go down. Alas, after so many years in the entertainment industry, I have never been popular because my role is too small. I still remember that year I acted in the famous TV series, the time-travel drama "Havoc in Heaven". . .

Fang Fang: Sun Wukong!

Jia Ling: Grandma Rong!

Fang Fang: Oh, it’s her. A *** has only one line, four words. . .

Jia Ling: Kangxi is here~ There are only lazy women in the world, not fat women. Say my name out loud, name is. . .

Audience: Teacher Jia.

Jia Ling: OK! OK, I love you my fans.

Fang Fang: Our special guest today is. . .

Aya: I, I, I, I, I, I, teachers, I’m sorry I’m late, I really didn’t mean it, I’m the female doctor from the Department of Acting, School of Drama , do I still have a chance?

Jia Ling: Oh, yes, yes.

Fang Fang: I'm very curious. You two are so young, so capable, and have a bright future. Why do you want to compete for the role of this noble concubine?

Aya: Hey! You don't understand. From childhood to adulthood, my life, my life, is for this role - Yang Guifei.

Jia Ling: My ambitions are different from yours. My biggest dream since I was a child is to play Zhang Fei. . . . Play the role of a noble concubine, play the role of Xi Shi.

Fang Fang: What exactly are you going to play?

Jia Ling: Xi Shi.

Fang Fang: Xi Shi, that’s just like it.

Jia Ling: What?

Fang Fang: Like a zombie.

Jia Ling: Let’s talk about Concubine Yang.

Aya: Hey, Concubine Yang, I want to play Concubine Yang, I want to play Concubine Yang.

Jia Ling: I also want to play Yang Guifei, I also want to play Yang Guifei.

Aya: I want to act.

Jia Ling: I want to act.

Fang Fang: Haven’t you discovered that only sincere truth is what everyone likes to hear?

Jia Ling: Hey!

Fang Fang: So your acting must be dramatic and convincing.

Aya: I do.

Fang Fang: Can you compare to Concubine Yang’s body? You only have these few taels.

Aya: I can play Yang Guifei before she develops. This is quite novel, no one has heard of it, when Yang Guifei was a child.

Jia Ling: Sister Fang Fang, the flesh on my body can play the role of Concubine Yang.

Fang Fang: Is Tang Minghuang blind?

Jia Ling: I can play the role of Concubine Yang before plastic surgery.

Fang Fang: It’s too much trouble. Let me do it directly. I have enough flesh anyway, so I will play a real version of Concubine Yang.

Jia Ling: Sister Fang Fang, it seems that Concubine Yang did not live to be as old as you.

Aya: Yes.

Fang Fang: Look down on people. When I was in my twenties, I once played a very young man. . .

Jia Ling: What?

Fang Fang: Nun. So to be honest, I also yearn for it. One day I can play the role of Concubine Yang, and I will play the most classic concubine taking a bath.

Aya: I didn’t expect Concubine Yang to have been in prison.

Fang Fang: No culture.

Jia Ling: It doesn’t matter if he has been in prison. The main thing is whether he has been sentenced to life.

Fang Fang: It’s really scary.

Jia Ling: What’s wrong?

Fang Fang: There is a generation gap.

Jia Ling: I have a proposal. For example, for Tang Minghuang and Yang Guifei, I think that if you want to perform them, you need to use new ideas in the performance. Nowadays, so many of our young friends like to watch Korean dramas. Let’s have a Korean drama version of Tang Minghuang and Yang Guifei. Let’s talk about it.

Aya: Korean drama version, good.

Jia Ling: Then who will play Tang Minghuang?

Fang Fang: I, I, I haven’t watched Korean dramas, but I’ll give it a try.

Jia Ling: No problem?

Fang Fang: No problem.

Jia Ling: I’ve been talking for a long time, but you didn’t understand a word.

Fang Fang: If you don’t speak Chinese, no one can understand me. If I speak Korean, you can’t understand me either.

Jia Ling: Then why don’t you give it a try? . . What does this mean?

Aya: I understand this.

Jia Ling: Then translate it. Above the diaphragm is the chest cavity, and below the diaphragm is the abdominal cavity. Above the diaphragm is the chest, below the diaphragm is the abdominal cavity.

Fang Fang: This won’t work.

Jia Ling: What’s wrong?

Fang Fang: Since we are playing Yang Guifei, of course we have to play it for We Chinese watch it ourselves, and we want to act in Chinese dramas.

Aya: That’s right, she can’t do that. You still need to find me, I will act.

Jia Ling: Listen to me first,

Aya: No, no, no.

Jia Ling: Let’s start with this. If this Korean drama version doesn’t work, I still have it. You see, I am a child from the countryside, so we will play a rural version of Tang Minghuang and Yang Guifei.

Aya: I have an opinion. I think our young people are the pillars of the future, and we should act in plays that are suitable for them. Therefore, Concubine Yang should play a trendy version of this classic drama.

Jia Ling: If you want to act, just act in the rural version.

Aya: Playing the trendy version.

Jia Ling: the rural version,

Aya: the trendy version.

Fang Fang: Okay, okay, okay. Whether it’s the rural version or your woodlouse version, the most important thing is which version the audience likes to watch. Let's do this, let the audience be the judges, you two act, and let them choose a version

Jia Ling: No problem, let's start with the rural version of the love story between Tang Minghuang and Yang Guifei.

Fang Fang: Okay,

Jia Ling: Step back.

Aya: Humph.

Jia Ling: There is an ancient river at the east end of the village.

Fang Fang: There is a big tortoise living in the river.

Jia Ling: One year there was a flood, and there were turtles everywhere

He (Fang Fang, Jia Ling): They just worked together and flew together.

Aya: Hello, this turns out to be a story about a turtle and a tortoise.

Jia Ling: Why do you curse? What we are doing is a touching love story.

Fang Fang: Yes!

Aya: Come on, I think it’s basically a love story between a turtle and a bastard.

Jia Ling: Ouch, let’s take a look at your steamy love story.

Fang Fang: Okay, okay, it doesn’t matter.

Aya: The trendy version of the trendy version.

Fang Fang: Okay, trendy version, trendy version.

Fang Fang: I will help you play the role of Tang Minghuang.

Aya:Okay, okay, okay. Xiao Ming, Xiao Ming, you know, I have a friend in my QQ group who is so awesome. He wants to help us deliver the fattest and tenderest lychees in Guangdong for us to eat. Are you happy, Xiao Ming? Not happy.

Fang Fang: Getting angry.

Aya: I just want to make you get angry. You can get angry as much as you want. You can get angry as hard as you can. You can get angry.

Fang Fang: Let me put out the fire for you. What are you dancing for?

Aya: Huh?

Fang Fang: I know, the song of colorful feathers.

Aya: No, I specially practiced a dance for you - single lady. . . How is it, how is it, are you dancing well? That trendy version is pretty good, right? Just use mine, just use mine.

Fang Fang: Hahahaha, I don’t understand. I think this is good. Since both of them love acting so much, I also abstained from voting. Indeed, I am not like Concubine Yang.

Aya: I look like it, I look like it.

Fang Fang: Then I will play Emperor Ming of the Tang Dynasty, and you two will play the concubine.

Jia Ling: Great.

Aya: OK, OK.

Fang Fang: You play Yang Guifei, you play the palace maid.

The little sister and I went to look at the lights and saw that she was a beauty. Let me try your heart, try your heart. At this point in the performance, I can tell you a secret. Why did I say that you two, In fact, you really shouldn’t fight for this role.

He (Jia Ling, Aya): Why?

Fang Fang: Let me show you. . .

Aya: Is there any secret?

Jia Ling: Oh, there is a royal list.

Fang Fang: Actually, yes. . .

Aya: Huh? I’m recruiting a kneeling concubine. Kneel down.

Jia Ling: Isn’t that just a palace daughter?

Aya: That’s right.

Jia Ling: We are such big names, is it appropriate to play this role? ?

Aya: Humph!

Jia Ling: Change it to someone else,

Fang Fang: I have a good friend in Japan, I think he can do it,< /p>

Jia Ling: Who is it?

Fang Fang: Help. Where's the phone?

Jia Ling: What a big shot, I've dialed the number for you.

Fang Fang: Hello, Kimura Takuya, I'm Fang Fang, Yang Guifei, you know, yes Yes, you played Yang Guifei, which was superb. Really, thank you very much and goodbye.

Aya: I can understand all the Japanese you speak.

Fang Fang: Yes, only the Japanese can’t understand it, but he understands it. He also promised to come.

Jia Ling: Then the three of us are out of luck.

Aya: Let’s go backstage to see him.

Fang Fang: No, we have to roll call,

Fang Fang: Fang Fang.

Jia Ling: Jia Ling.

Aya:Aya.

He (Fang Fang, Jia Ling, Aya): Get off the stage and bow.

This is it!