Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - What is a homophonic joke?

What is a homophonic joke?

If you want me dead, I have to die.

Mushrooms were walking on the road and were hit by oranges. "I have no eyes, go to hell," said the mushroom angrily. "Then the orange died. . . Because bacteria will kill oranges, oranges must die. .

2。 sika deer

During the festival, the little rabbit said angrily to the deer, you see other girls can receive flowers, why not give them to me? The deer said piteously, because I am a sika deer.

3。 Lifelong driving ban

Today, in the driving school theory class, the teacher said, "Those who cause serious traffic accidents to escape are forbidden to drive for life."

A girl in the back raised her hand and said, "Then I will never get married?" Everyone laughed their heads off. ...

4。 Coffin manufacturer

On his deathbed, Grandpa called his young and ignorant grandson to the bed and said with his last breath, "Son, this world ... is so good to be an official!" " The little grandson is an obedient child, and he firmly remembers grandpa's words before his death. Many years later, he finally became the best coffin manufacturer in the village.

5。 express

A woman came to a man's house to play, and the woman teased the man and said, if you have a piece of land, I will marry you. Then the doorbell rang, and the courier brother said, sir, there is a courier for you!

6. Look at the chicken.

Once upon a time, there was a landlord who loved chickens very much. The tenant rented his land, but it was not enough to pay the rent. He must give him a chicken first.

A tenant named Zhang San went to pay the rent to the landlord at the end of the year and rented it out the next year. When he went, he put a chicken in a bag, paid the rent and told the landlord about the lease for next year. Seeing that his hands were empty, he opened his eyes and said to the sky, "There are no three kinds of fields." Zhang Sanming understood the meaning of this sentence and immediately took the chicken out of the bag.

As soon as the landlord saw the chicken, he immediately changed his tune and said, "If you don't give it to Zhang San, who will you give it to?" Zhang San said, "Your words have changed so fast!"

The landlord replied, "That sentence was nonsense (chicken talk) just now, and now this sentence is" play it by ear (chicken talk) "

7. Are the ears here?

The new magistrate is from Shandong. Because he wanted to hang his son, he said to the master, "Go and buy me two bamboo poles."

I heard that the bamboo pole with Shandong accent was "pig liver", so I quickly agreed, ran to the butcher's shop and said to the shopkeeper, "Master Xinxian wants to buy two pig livers, so be smart!"

The shopkeeper is a clever man. He immediately cut off two pieces of pig liver and gave a pair of pig ears.

Out of the butcher's shop, the master thought, "My master told me to buy pig liver, and this pig ear is of course mine ..." So he wrapped the hunting ear, stuffed it into his pocket, returned to the county government, and reported to the magistrate: "Report back to Grandpa, the pig liver has been bought!"

The magistrate was very angry when he saw that the master had bought pig liver, and said, "Where are your ears!" " Hearing this, the master turned pale with fear and quickly replied, "Ear … Ear … here … in my … pocket!" " " "