The classic joke.

I am a man of principle. In the final analysis, there is only one principle in my life.

Three words, look at the mood.

You young people just take money too seriously! Nothing is left on the table. What if the wind blows away?

When I hate someone, if this person suddenly says that he likes me, then I don't hate each other at all. I am so principled because I can't hate a man with vision.

I finally became the kind of person I hate most. I hate good-looking people since I was a child.

No one has ever confessed to me, which shows that I have always been secretly loved.

They say I can't lose weight until I'm full. That's ridiculous. I'm not full at all.

I feel that I am in love with my math teacher, because in front of the person I love, my IQ is basically zero.

8. The real girl with a low smile is that if you smile at her for a few seconds, she will start giggling at you.

9. I really envy those friends who travel during the holidays. People like me who can travel at any time can't feel that kind of happiness at all!

Violence can't solve anything. Why don't we sit down calmly and praise me for an hour, and we'll make up.

There must be pure friendship between men and women, because every girl who knows me says that she can only be friends with me at most.

I was smoking in the street, and a beggar came to borrow my cigarette. I gave him one, and he looked at the sign and gave it back to me.

If you think I am wrong, please tell me. I won't change it anyway. Don't hide your illness.

14. Please remember one sentence: you must eat breakfast! Of course. Not because it is unhealthy, but because it is the cheapest meal in your day!

15. You have to believe that as long as you work hard and actively, the company will definitely see it. They will assign you more jobs, never bury talents and never give you a raise.

Sixteen years old. Tourism, there is a temple in the scenic spot, so I stopped by to play in the temple. When you buy a ticket, ask if you have a student ticket. The result of the conductor's answer is super classic. He said: all beings are equal before the Buddha, and there is no student ticket!

17. The red envelope was sent to the wrong person. I contacted the other party and returned it. The other party replied: "Fortunately, you met me!" "Mm-hmm, thank you very much!" He went on to say, "If you meet someone else, you may get it back!"

18. My wife said I was younger than her.

Sixteen generations! I asked her why she said that. She said I fixed it.

Eight generations of fu married her, and she said she fell.

Eight generations of mold married me!

19. Who said you were a miser? The iron cock will lose some rust. You are a stainless steel cock!

two

10. At first, he vowed to live forever. Later, he vowed never to change his mind. Later, he vowed to turn over a new leaf. Finally, he swore that he didn't swear anything.

Twenty one. My friend said that I have a double chin, which is caused by frequent brushing of my mobile phone. Since then, every time I brush my mobile phone, I always look up. Unexpectedly, a month later, I had a tattoo on my head.

22. Men, don't get tired of masks, because they can keep women quiet for half an hour and only cost a few dollars. Can you do it? Affordable, you deserve it.

23. A woman's wardrobe is like a harem.

Mimia

Liuyuan

seven

Twelve concubines, countless beautiful women of all colors, but they just spoil so many.

24. Life is not easy, so don't drown your sorrows in wine. If you feel sad, go to bed early. Wine costs money, you can save a bottle.

Twenty-five I have to go out for a walk. After all, such a good face is always hidden at home, which is a great loss to society.