Women's Day sketch

The woman came on stage: It’s a meeting, it’s a meeting, oh, I’m so busy, what kind of meeting is it? The women are having a meeting. Do any of the women below want to come up to the meeting?

Hurry, hurry up.

A few women came up: Here we come, here we come.

Female: Everyone is here, sit down quickly. Hey, where is Widow Wang? She might have gone to sit on the stage again, so go look for her. (Shouting together)

Wang: Coming, coming.

Female: What have you been doing?

Wang: Forget it, I’m almost too busy.

Female: What are you busy with?

Wang: My pig gave birth.

Female: Oh, this is a happy event.

Wang: No, I gave birth to eight babies, and I helped them breastfeed.

Female: Are you breastfeeding? Just you? (Goes up and points at her)

Wang: No, I milk the sow to feed the piglets.

Female: How does that little pig look?

Wang: The little pig is so beautiful. He looks like our village chief.

Female: Okay, okay, oh, the village chief hasn’t come yet, I’ll take a seat first. (Let’s say together: Sit down.) The village chief’s seat is very comfortable.

Village Chief: Ahem, (walked around the arena, walked behind the women’s director, coughed again, the women’s director quickly got up) (said together: The village chief is here. The village chief is on holiday

Pretending not to hear)

Female: The village chief is here. Village chief, please sit down.

Village Chief: The village chief’s seat is comfortable. Go back and sit aside. (Sit down and light a cigarette, then take off your socks and touch your feet. Let’s say together: It stinks.)

What are you doing, what are you doing? We are all here, ready for the meeting. Before the meeting, first talk about the weather forecast. It was sunny yesterday and sunny the day before yesterday.

Let’s say it together: We need to know what’s going on today and tomorrow.

Village Chief: The weather today is very bright during the day and very dark at night. You women who are afraid of the dark must not go out. If something happens, it is not my village chief’s fault.

That's all Yue Ruo's fault. Today's wind direction is level one or two, at most two or three, and will not exceed level four or five. At most, it will be level six or seven, and will not exceed level seven or eight.

The wind direction is from east to west, from west to south, from south to north, and from north to red. As long as the wind does not blow, it is a good wind.

Let’s say together: What are you talking about? Let’s play cards.

Village Chief: The county is coming to our village to watch a cultural show. Are your programs ready? Let me know, Women Director.

Female: Village chief, we are almost ready.

Village Chief: Have you held the welcome ceremony yet?

Female: No.

Cun: I knew you didn’t do it. All stand up, I teach you to do this, welcome, warm welcome, welcome, endless welcome,

That’s it, you do it again. (Learn to do it again)

Female: Village chief, your wife is here.

Cun: Hey, what is she doing here? In fact, everyone knows that I have a beautiful wife. It’s not that I don’t let her go out, it’s not that I’m afraid of others seducing her, but I’m afraid that she’ll seduce others.

Po: What is he saying here? (Grabs his ear)

Village: Oh, what are you doing? Give me some face, don’t say anything. I am also the head of a village. Go back quickly. Go and see if anyone from the county is here (go on and talk)

They are here, they are here.

All stand up: welcome, warm welcome, welcome, endless welcome.

The county people came on stage: Ah, okay, okay, okay, okay, stop, stop, stop, that, I was sent by the county magistrate, I came here by masturbating, and then I got on the tractor, and then

Come and ride the bicycle sent by your women’s director (ah!). (Oh!) Finally, I went into the sorghum field with your female director.

(Ah!) The water came out. (Ah!) The yield of rice. (Oh!) Ah, I'm very busy. Who is the village chief?

Let’s say together: This is the village chief.

Then people from the county walked over, held a young lady's hand and said, "You are the village chief. The little girl's hands are very white."

At this time the village chief came over: Leader, I am the village chief. Please sit down. (People from the county sat down) Leader, you are tired, please wipe your sweat. (Took out his stinky socks to the county people. The county people didn’t even look at them. They just picked them up and wiped them. They smelled something wrong. When they saw they were socks, they said: What are these? The village chief said: See what he said)

Sorry, sorry, I got the wrong one.

County: Okay, okay, how is your program schedule going?

Village: That’s almost it.

County: Then show me your performance.

Village: Yes, yes. Women Director, where is your program? Come on, who's going to perform?

Let’s say: Widow Wang. (Push her out)

Wang: Good leader, good leader, I’ll say it first. Ah... (frightened and fell to the ground together) You are so old-fashioned, this is called expressing feelings. The Yangtze River is so damn long, the Yellow River is so damn yellow, the sea is so damn big, men have three legs, and women have two mouths.

They were so frightened that they all pulled her down: Stop talking, stop talking

County: Village chief, this is your show, what is it, do you have any more?

Village Chief: And, and, you two sisters, come out.

The two girls came out and walked up to the front to practice their voices: Ah... (Then they sang I Love Tiananmen Square in Beijing, and then the music of "Unstoppable Style" started and they walked to the county people

In front of me, I touched him randomly.)

County: What’s going on with you, you dare to seduce a 24-level national cadre, village chief, what’s going on?

Village: Oh, forget it, you come as the women director. (Pushing out the female director)

Female: Then I will sing. My family lives on a high loess slope, and my mother’s cousin lives on the slope. Before they got married, they secretly gave birth to me in a daze, ah...

Ah...

County: What a mess, ah...

Village: You, what are you still doing here, get out! (All exit) Leader, leader, wait a moment, I still have a program, please wait for me,

I'll go change clothes.

County: Yes, yes. (Then say a few words above)

(Dancing team members come on) The music of "Sing This Song" started, and the village chief took the lead in dancing. After the dance, the people in the county said: Not bad, not bad, are there any more? ?

Village Chief: Also, and leaders, please continue to watch the following program.

End

Meeting 2

The village chief appeared, sat down and asked: Where is my secretary Xiaodou? Let’s talk together (I didn’t see it, maybe I’m sitting on the stage somewhere)

Village chief: “Why don’t you go find him quickly (let’s call him, Xiaodou, Xiaodou)

Xiaodou: Oh, come on Here we come.

Village Chief: Where have you been? (Go and see if anyone from the county is here.)

Xiaodou: Got it (don’t tell me). Come on, come on.

Village chief: Let’s start soon.

The people from the county held Xiaodou’s hand. The little girl’s hand was very white.

p>

Village Chief: Why are you still standing here, get out of here.

County people: You all go, you stay, pointed at Xiaodou, the village chief thought he was talking about him, and turned back immediately.

County person: I am talking about her, not you. Pointing at Xiaodou, the village chief said: Xiaodou, take care and get out

County person: Xiaodou, I know a director , he still has a heroine there, do you want to go?

Xiaodou: Of course I do, but I can’t act.

County person: It doesn’t matter, let’s practice it now. .

Xiaodou: Okay.

County person: Let me tell you the story first. It’s like this. This man and this woman haven’t seen each other for a long time. Hug when you meet, from both sides

(Start)

Xiaodou: That’s it, I understand.

County person: Xiaodou, dear Xiaodou, I’m finally back. .

Xiaodou: Ah, ah, ah

County person: What are you doing?

Xiaodou: How do I know your name?

County person: By the way, I forgot, your name is Xiaodou, I will call you Daqian.

Xiaodou: Got it (come again)

County person: Xiaodou, dear, I am finally back (come together) Xiaodou gave him a slap in the face.

Xiaodou: Ah, big gun song, big gun song.

County person: Why did you hit me?

Xiaodou: What do you want to do?

County person: Xiaodou, dear, I am finally back (go to the middle)

Xiaodou waved down, the village chief came up, the county person touched the village chief’s feet, they are so hairy , sexy, while touching up, I touched the middle of the village chief. How come you are like me?

When I opened my eyes, I saw it was the village chief (ah)

Village chief: Kicked him to the ground: "Folks, come and beat this pervert, come up together, hit him with something, and run down."