When you learn to control the field, the world will listen.

People always want the world to run according to their own wishes and people around them to listen to them. In fact, you will find it extremely difficult to get others to listen to you and be guided by you!

I don't know, have you ever had such an experience:

"When you are talking with others cheerfully and preparing to state your important points, you find that the other person's eyes are wandering on other things, or you turn your head to one side."

"When you are ready to recommend a new product to the other party, she is distracted thinking about what time to go to the party at night, or just nodding symbolically out of courtesy."

"Sometimes, you try your best to give everything, but no one appreciates it, which makes you very disappointed and still doesn't get the result you want."

In work and life, what really brings us pain is not ourselves, but often this headache interpersonal relationship. Do you often think about similar questions:

"Why don't the children listen to me?"

"Why do people play mobile phones when I talk?"

"Why do customers prefer to deal with her?"

"Why am I right, that is, no one listens?"

? "Why do I pay so much, or nobody likes me?"

In fact, at the end of the day, you should ask yourself, "Why can't I attract others' attention and convince others effectively? " 」

? If you can solve this problem, you will find that your life will change dramatically! But most people are used to their own inherent speaking and social patterns, content with the status quo, and will not feel distressed until there are problems! But I don't know how to change it!

? Fertout, an American popular psychologist, said in the book Control Field: "When you learn to control the field, the world will obey!"

""What is a control field? "Control field is to pass your own ideas to each other and restrict each other's behavior. It is an advanced theory and a set of practical technologies. ]

An excellent politician can guide the public to believe his words through his own control of the field!

An excellent entrepreneur can make the team work willingly through his own control technology!

A good salesman can make you pay the bill in a few simple sentences!

A very resourceful mother can make her children get rid of the habit of playing games through good communication!

"These are the forces in the field of control at work! 」

Can you be the real center of your life and network? Take control of the situation and become a veritable master?

On the other hand, what would your life be like if you didn't have this ability? You will be a salesman who can't sell anything! A crazy father or mother every day! A doormat not liked by the team! In short, your life will always be restricted by others, dealing with people you don't like, doing things you don't like, and obeying others' expectations, not your own inner thoughts.

? It sounds sad, but it's true!

"So if you want to live well and have a better life, you must learn to have the ability to control the field. 」

? — ? 1 ? —

To control others, we must first control our own aura.

Let the other person trust you and be willing to contact you, which is the first question. Try to give each other a sense of trust through your image, smile, handshake, eyes, tone, mentality, mood and actions. Imagine, would you like to keep in touch with someone with a dead face?

When my sister and I run a beauty salon in Tianhe, Guangzhou, we often come into contact with strange visits from sales representatives of various cosmetic companies. The atmosphere and communication methods of each salesperson are different, and the results are different. What impressed me so far is that Xiao Ma and Xiao Deng met in our store for the first time:

The weather in Guangzhou was already very hot at around 5 pm in May the year before last. They all walked into the shop and greeted us with smiles. Then I formally handed in my business card and briefly introduced myself. Both of them wore uniform light blue shirts, black European suits and uniform briefcases, which looked solemn without losing the vitality and fashion of young people. Pony, wearing black-rimmed glasses, has a loud voice and a radical tone. Xiao Deng, a typical "Korean version of Ouba", speaks politely and has a strong logical thinking.

At the beginning of the conversation, Xiao Deng first asked about the recent operation of the beauty salon, the customer's arrival rate, return rate, referral, the effect of the customer's activities, the ratio of beauticians to management and so on. After that, he pointed out some problems, as if he were worrying about the beauty salon, and then gave some suitable solutions for reference.

Gradually, there were more topics and the atmosphere was relaxed. At this time, Ma Xiao immediately took out a brief introduction of their company, and introduced the training mechanism of the company and the highlights of its products. At that time, all you had to do was sign a bill. Although it took a while to sign. But from the time they enter the store to the end of the conversation, to the return visit and follow-up service every few days. Their professionalism and service feel particularly trustworthy! Of course, I have to admire their excellent control of the stadium!

"There are many ways to make people believe in you and agree with you. You don't even have to talk, you can achieve this effect by your own actions and behaviors! 」

When I first came into contact with this Chinese herbal health care product company, sales manager Yu Xin left a deep impression on everyone in the team with her actions and behaviors. She is a person with congenital physical disease, so it is inconvenient to move. However, no matter where she goes on a business trip, she will bring a big bag of company products and take them on time and according to the quantity. She has persisted in this habit for more than ten years. Of course, her physique may not be as good as that of a healthy person, and her complexion is getting better and better! Became the core figure with strong influence in the team!

"In short, no matter what way you use, whether it is image, language or action, you must first gain the trust of the other party. 」

— 2 —

? See through each other's psychology and control each other.

? 1. Actively and sincerely create a warm, friendly and harmonious atmosphere, understand each other's emotions in advance, and use the skills around you to understand each other's personality, living habits, family background, hobbies, etc. Look at his mood through some small details. As Dr. Sina Fazong wrote in Communication, "When you meet a stranger in social situations, you should focus on him for the first few minutes, and many people's lives will change."

Paying attention to each other's feelings will make people feel respected, and you can feel the aura of others as soon as possible. ]

2. After contact, form a * * * vibration with each other in the aura as soon as possible. For example, some people, judging from his firm and powerful footsteps and slightly rising corners of the mouth, are in the rising period of their careers, confident and proud, and have a strong desire for control. In the face of such people, their aura cannot be above him, nor can they be humble and weak in front of him. Make him look at you in some ways.

? Some people wear plain clothes, and the deep wrinkles on their foreheads show that he started from scratch and went through countless difficulties. Simplicity, vicissitudes and steadiness constitute his aura. He doesn't like people who exaggerate the facts, so pay attention to his language and don't let him feel that you are guiding him to take an "adventure" in a conversation.

? There are also some fashionable, enthusiastic and vain ladies. At this time, if you look dull, she will feel bored. So, make yourself lively, praise her taste, and look for jokes in your mind.

"In short, the other person is what kind of person, you have to strive to be that kind of person, like a chameleon to change the color of your aura. The result of the change is that you will make the other person feel very comfortable, just like finding a bosom friend, and make the other person feel that you are his best friend and partner in the future. 」

? 3. When the gas field vibrates, you need to start interaction for a period of time, give each other an opportunity to get to know each other and enhance mutual trust and goodwill.

? If you pretend to listen with a smile when others are chattering, you are actually like a target, being shot mercilessly by bullets in the other language, which is very painful. In fact, you don't want to give lectures to others, and you don't need to let others give lectures to you like students. Learning to listen is an art, but being too far-fetched and rigid will make the atmosphere too tense. In fact, it is also appropriate to have an interesting discussion on a topic.

Just like every time you watch the Olympic Games, the most beautiful competition is not necessarily the competition with the highest technical level, but it must be the most competitive competition. The fierce competition between you and me is the most thrilling.

"This is all about communication-real interaction."

? — 3 —

Control each other's behavior

? "Natural guidance began to convey ideas superficially. By depicting scenes, showing experiences, conveying effective hints in words, and then conveying the deepest guidance. Just like the' last step' on the court. "

? For example, the following sentence is an effective hint:

? "I have done too much of this business in the past few years."

? "I told you because we are friends."

"According to the skin care method I suggested to you, you can obviously feel the effect tomorrow."

"I believe you can make the right choice."

You can express these words naturally and sincerely in many conversations, and at the same time speak faster and have a confident tone. However, hints must be based on facts, not on deception.

Some people always lack a sense of purpose and can't make a decision. At this time, I need you to help him draw a blueprint, the clearer the better.

? Sometimes, you need to take out "exchange chips". When you want to control others, have you ever thought about what you can give them and why they should listen to you?

? Sometimes, "convincing" pressure points are needed. Most people hate pressure and are unwilling to accept failure. A pressure point is a hint in the heart that makes the other person nervous. A pressure point can make up for the lack of chips.

For example, if you want to transfer your used car, the other party is a little hesitant about your offer. If you see his desire to buy, you can say to him, "that's good, or I'll ask someone else." If no one accepts this offer, I will reduce the price for you. I'm not in a hurry to sell. At this time, the other party will make a purchase decision. "

But we can't turn pressure into a threat, which will cause great resistance. The more natural the guidance, the easier it is to achieve * * * knowledge.

? What if the other person's gas field is much bigger than yours?

? "Can you pretend to be strong? Can you show weakness? Can it be guided internationally? 」

It's hard to pretend to be strong. First of all, you must have a good acting talent and believe that you are a "fake role". This disguise is not as simple as self-confidence, because you need to overcome the subconscious imprisonment that always stays in the past and present. To complete this change.

? Weakness can weaken each other's gas field, which is a "trick". You need to pretend to be poor and win each other's sympathy. My son often uses this trick on me.

When I was in Guangzhou the year before last, he wanted me to take him to xiaomeisha during the summer vacation.

One day he said to me, "Mom, is xiaomeisha the sea?"

"yes."

"Then will you take me there to play?"

"But mom is a little busy and has no time now!"

"Didn't you say you could take me to many interesting places this summer vacation? Let me see more scenery. Can I write a good composition? "

Then my son's eyes began to turn red and stood in front of me pitifully. I can't convince him with my parents' majesty at this time. I booked a plane ticket to Shenzhen at that time.

? "Great, thank you, Mom." My son hugged me happily. I know I will be defeated by his tricks next time. But who can have the heart to refuse him?

"When you show weakness and gain sympathy from the other party, the powerful aura of the other party is easily weakened by you. This is because once the other person has compassion, his shallow consciousness will understand you and want to help you. At this time, the gas field will automatically move closer to your gas field, and the other person's gas field will automatically weaken. 」

? "Cross-border Guidance" If you are a college student and want a professor to recommend you a job, if you just ask him questions in class, at most he will regard you as a very hard-working student. But if you try to study the professor's professional field and honor, and then find some professional questions to ask him, discuss with him, or even ask him higher-level questions, if he takes you seriously, he will ask you a question that makes you happy: "Which company are you going to work for?" At this time, you can guide in the direction of the recommendation letter.

"The essence of this rule is that you show your professional self to each other. Then, the other party will also consider that this student has a bright future. Will I benefit from it? 」

Whether in life, work, sales, business negotiations, leading a team, educating children and many other occasions, the power to control the field is everywhere. But you have to understand that the defendants in these occasions are not your enemies, but their relatives, friends, colleagues and partners. They are just your opponents when you use field control technology at one time.

Mastering the field control technology, the biggest advantage is that under any circumstances, in the face of any opponent, you can solve it in a "harmless" way, not only to achieve your ultimate goal but also to maintain good interpersonal relationships. How great this feeling is!

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