The meaningful campus three-person crosstalk is short and pithy, and no online swearing! ! !

Cao: This crosstalk is one after another.

Liu: Yes.

Cao: Crosstalk is the art of language, and China's language is profound.

Liu: That's right.

Cao: Every word has its meaning.

Liu: Oh?

Cao: Don't say a word, not even a punctuation mark. If you don't pay attention, you will make jokes.

Liu: Really?

Cao: Let's take our family for example.

Liu: What's wrong?

Cao: I have a friend from Shanxi, who grew up in the mountains, without schooling, learning and education.

How old is he? He is in his thirties, almost forty. We can both call it forgetting to make friends. I'm talking about it.

Call him second brother. Once he invited me to dinner.

Liu: Hmm.

Cao: It is expected to arrive at noon 1 1: 30.

Liu: Oh

Cao: Then I will go home. He also invited a guest.

Liu: Oh

Cao: But this one won't come until twelve o'clock.

Liu: Yo.

Cao: He was in a hurry, so he drew a note.

Liu: No, no, why do you paint later?

Cao: Because he can't write.

Liu; oh

Cao: So I drew a note.

Liu: You can only draw.

Cao: What do I draw? Draw a kitten with one hand covering her mouth and the other hand covering her mouth.

I don't understand what this means.

Liu: That's strange.

Cao: He folded it up and sent the children at the door to the uncle in the front yard. He lives not far away.

Live in the front yard and send it away. After a while, the child will come back, and people will bring it back without it.

A note. When I look at what I draw, it is also a picture. It was painted in a birdcage.

There is a turtle on his face. The turtle's head is outside the birdcage, and the turtle is inside the birdcage.

As soon as he looked, we didn't wait for him. Let's eat. I said, no, no, no, leave me alone.

I still don't understand what this means.

Liu: Yes.

Cao: What do you mean by drawing a kitten with one hand covering her mouth and one hand covering her ass?

ah

Liu: Why?

Cao: Hi, I told him to invite him to dinner this afternoon.

Liu: Hello.

Cao: Oh, it's afternoon covering your ass. Then he drew a birdcage with a turtle's brain in it.

Wrapped outside the birdcage, the turtle is inside the birdcage. What does that mean?

Liu: Hmm.

Cao: He told me that I probably couldn't get out (Cao and Liu are both groping for grace).

Oh, can't big Gail go out? Hi-tech, this thing

Liu: The background of the spy.

Cao: Oh, eat, eat, drink, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat.

Drink it.

Liu: Why?

Cao: I'm going to perform in Taiyuan, Shanxi next week. Your hometown is also in Taiyuan. what can I do for you?

If you have anything, please give it to me. I'll take second brother to listen to it for you. I'm glad, great, great.

Well, when you get to Taiyuan, you can find the sour master in Xinggan Village, and that's my father.

Honey, please bring me something. What should I bring? A letter, a letter 500 yuan.

Isn't that all 500 yuan? Yes, give me a letter from 500 yuan. I'll give it to the east.

Xi Du received a short notice that he would go to Taiyuan for a performance by train the next day.

Liu: I have to go now.

Cao: I didn't bring my game machine when I got on the bus (sigh)

Liu: Why did you take that?

Cao: I didn't bring my book either. It's a long way to sleep. What do you think I'm doing?

(An audience member shouts: Open the letter)

Cao: bosom friend. This is a bosom friend (panic of beauty). Let me open the letter and have a look.

Liu: No, no, wait a minute. Don't be beautiful This is immoral, you know?

Cao: Right.

Liu: I know, but I have to tear it down.

Cao: Are you in charge? I opened your letter. I opened your letter.

Liu: No, no.

Cao: Is there anything I can do? Are you in charge? Are you in charge?

Liu: Broken mouth.

Cao: It's none of your business.

Liu: That's all right.

Cao: Look, look. Take it out and have a look I'm very happy.

Liu: What's the matter

Cao: I drew another one.

Liu: Why are they all paintings?

Cao: Well, I drew a picture, which is quite vivid.

Liu: What do you have?

Cao: There are seven camels on this side of the letter.

Liu: Camel?

Cao: Does the camel know?

Liu: Camels know.

Cao: (gesturing seven camels with his hand)

Liu: I said, I said, don't draw all seven in the future, okay?

Cao: There are seven camel letters. This is a big tree with two flies on its fork.

There are four bastards lying on the ground, with two flagons and an egg beside them.

I don't understand. Fold it up and put it in the envelope. Take a nap. We will arrive in Taiyuan in a short time.

When I arrived at the Taiben Theater, I turned around the next day and strolled around the local area.

Liu: Fight.

Cao: Do you want to buy some local products?

Liu: Right.

Cao: A local product is nothing more than alcohol and tobacco.

Liu: That's right.

Cao: I am used to drinking foreign wine in Beijing. Buy some cigarettes.

Liu: Well, that's ok.

Cao: I'm going to look at the local cigarettes. Alas, how much is this Shanxi cigarette in Yantan, 100 yuan per cigarette?

(Hesitant) If it's cheaper, 100 a piece. Buy it, buy it or not.

Liu: No bargaining.

Cao: Not expensive either. Buy one. Bring me the cigarette. I remember. I came here.

What business?

Liu: What is it?

Cao: Send something to the second brother's house.

Liu: Oh, yes.

Cao: Isn't that right, Mr. Acid from Xing 'an Village?

Liu: That's right.

Cao: Look for it. It is easy to find.

Liu: It's easy to find.

Cao: As soon as I saw the house, I closed the door and slapped Chai Fei.

Liu: No, there's no need to delay these days. You can say knock.

Cao: Are you making trouble?

Liu: No.

Cao: Knock.

Liu: Don't use that.

Cao: Knock.

Liu: Why knock when there is a doorbell?

Cao: I'll do everything I can to see if it rings.

Liu: I am here to play.

Cao: As soon as the door opened, there stood an old man who was nearly sixty years old. I said you are the acid of xinggan village.

Master? Yes, I am Suanzhu (Shanxi dialect). Your taste is sour. I said your son.

Let me bring you something. What did my son ask you to bring me? Come on, come on, come in, come in.

come

Liu: Let it in.

Cao: Let me go inside. My son asked you to bring me something. Hey, your son, let me bring you one.

There's 400 yuan left.

Liu: No, later you were wrong about 500 yuan.

Cao: Four hundred.

Liu: No, you just said it was 500.

Cao: What did I say?

Liu: No, there is a difference of one hundred dollars here.

Cao: Nonsense. Buy cigarettes.

Liu: What about buying cigarettes with other people's money?

Cao: I'll give him a try. Is it good or not?

Liu: Is anyone taking advantage of you?

Cao: Are you in charge? I took your money. I took your money. what can I do for you? You're always sharp.

Things.

Liu: Why are you gossiping like this? It's none of my business.

Cao: A letter is for 400 yuan.

Liu: Hmm.

Cao: I handed in my things. The old man took the letter and opened it. Look at me. Look at this letter. Look at me.

What's your relationship with my son? -A nodding acquaintance

Liu: No, you are brothers. You just said that.

Cao: (shaking his head) Not brothers.

Liu: Why?

Cao: Do you know? You stole someone else's 100 yuan to buy cigarettes, which is outrageous.

Liu: (angry) You feel inferior enough.

Cao: Don't worry. It's just a nodding acquaintance.

Liu: Look at this.

Cao: When the old man read the letter, I was wrong. You and my son are brothers. How did you know? -Letter

It is clearly written (questioned). Where is it written?

Liu: Yes.

Cao: Look, this letter is painted with seven camels. We Shanxi people have a rule called camel.

Liu: What are the rules?

Cao: Five consistent, 60% string, 70% gang, 80% gang. There are seven camels painted on it, which means one.

Beat the child means that you and my son are brothers.

Liu: Oh

Cao: We are all camels.

Liu: Hey, I didn't say that.

Cao: I think this 100 yuan has solved the case.

Liu: I think so.

Cao: We have to grit our teeth. How much money did my son ask you to bring me (a little something)-400.

Liu: It's empty.

Cao: (looking at the letter) No! Yeah! ! ! (shaking hands)

Liu: Can you not be nervous?

Cao: The luggage should be turned over.

Liu: Hey, don't bother.

Cao: Four hundred-no, five hundred-where did you say five hundred?

Liu: Yes.

Cao: The letter is clearly written (horizontally) where it is written and where it is written.

Liu: The energy is broken again. Tell me.

Cao: We're going to install it horizontally.

Liu: Oh

Cao: Look at this letter. There is a big tree painted on it. There are two flies on the branch of this tree. We are from Shanxi.

Call this fly a fly.

Liu: What's its name?

Cao: That's called a fly.

Liu: A fly?

Cao: The money we spend is also called silver.

Liu: Oh

Cao: Look at this picture. Two flies landed on the fork of a tree. My son told me that I have money.

(talking and gesturing)

Liu: (thinking for a long time) Wow! It's amazing!

Cao: Does it say 500? -It's 400.

Liu: Yes!

Cao: That's 400, that's 400-then look under the tree. There are four bastards standing, and there are two flagons standing.

Thirty-two, two, nine, one, eight, fifty-that's fifty. That's fifty, too It doesn't say 500.

(Horizontal)-There is an egg next to it!

Liu: Hello!

(Laughter from the audience! ! ! )

Cao: (Q) Are you from the earth?

Liu: It's amazing.

Cao: Is the way of communication special? Tell the truth, uncle. I bought a cigarette at 100 yuan.

Liu: To tell the truth.

Cao: That's all right. Money is a thing outside the body.

Liu: Look.

Cao: Go if you want. I'm leaving tomorrow so that you can come to my house and bring me something at night.

I said yes, don't worry. Anyway, I went home again at night. The old man took out two envelopes.

These two help me take this big one to my son and this small one to your second brother.

Liu: Oh

Cao: Don't worry-don't open it and see if I say no, I'll say this.

There is no money in the room, is there? -No, you can't give you money.

Liu: drink ~!

(Keep laughing ...)

Liu: That's right.

Cao: (Sorry) Are you bored like this?

Liu: It's quite interesting.

Cao: I'm embarrassed (covering my face)

Liu: How dare you?

Cao: I took my things and got on the train and went back to Beijing. I'm so bored.

Liu: Yes.

Cao: I didn't bring my game machine either.

Liu: Oh

(A group of people in the audience shouted: Open the letter! ! ! )

Cao: There are more and more bosom friends.

Liu: Alas, you are going to learn badly.

Cao: I opened the letter to see if they had learned something bad from me.

Liu: Almost.

Cao: Let me open the letter.

Liu: tear it down.

Cao: I'll open this big one first and take out the letter. Wow, this letter is really interesting!

Liu: What's wrong?

Cao: It's still a painting.

Liu: What do you have?

Cao: There are two buckets. The bottom of the bucket is buckled. There are two flies on the bucket.

Do you want to ask about the money here

Liu: Yes, I have money.

Cao: We know about the silver. His father once told me about it.

Liu: Yes.

Cao: Look at the profile and draw a big circle and a small circle. There is a firecracker in the great circle.

The firecrackers set off in the New Year are a bit like a small circle, covered with a layer of silkworm chrysalis.

Liu: I know.

Cao: Silkworm cocoon

Liu: You can make silk thread.

Cao: Oh, I don't know what this silk thread thing means. It was folded and put in an envelope.

Take this small one apart.

Liu: I have to see everything.

Cao: I'll open it. Wow!

Liu: What do you mean?

Cao: Very interesting.

Liu: Yes.

Cao: It's too coke.

Liu: Tell me about it.

Cao: Two pigeons, a duck, two pigeons, a duck, four pigeons and two ducks are vividly painted.

On this side of the letter, there is a picture of an elephant with a knife wrapped around its nose and the tip stuck in the neck of a goose.

Stabbed the goose to death and its neck was bleeding.

Liu: Alas!

Cao: At the bottom of the letter, there is a picture of a broken chain and a small charcoal, and a small one is drawn below.

People have flat heads and black coats, with a hundred dollars in one hand and a cigarette in the other (while saying

Side strokes)

(audience laughs ~! ! Constant sound)

Cao: (gesturing foolishly to see) It seems that there is still me?

Liu: (I'm so happy) There must be you!

Cao: I don't know what this means. If I wait in the envelope, I can't sleep. I will wait here.

Liu: Then, why don't you do it?

Cao: Soon, I arrived in Beijing. After I came out of Beijing, I didn't even go home. I went directly to my second brother's house.

Liu: Oh

Cao: My second brother, I've come to get something. Thank you. Thank you for opening and closing the drawer.

Come on, you go-never mind, don't go, open it-never mind our letter. what are you reading?

-there is me (excited gesture). This is me. It's really, really, really me.

Liu: I missed it.

Cao: How can there be you-don't talk nonsense, open it quickly-OK, I'll open it, but don't tell anyone.

First, take this big one apart and open it-good gold. You have to make such friends.

Liu: What's the matter?

Cao: What's the matter? You brought me money.-Where is it written? Look at this picture of two buckets.

There are two flies. We Shanxi people don't call this fly a fly, but a fly-I know there are flowers here.

Money is also called silver-oh, you know this. We don't call this bucket a bucket.

Liu: What's your name?

Cao: It's called Shuijian.

Liu: Oh

Cao: Look at these two buckets, that is, the water tip is put down, and it is a sentence to connect with this fly.

Liu: What can I say?

Cao: The silver has arrived.

Liu: OK.

Cao: If the water is reversed, it will be reversed. Okay, what do I mean by big circle and small circle?

Liu: Huh?

Cao: The big circle is a rice bowl, and the small circle is a tea bowl. Oh, I said there was a firecracker in the big circle and a cocoon in the small circle.

What do you mean-my father thinks I think about it in my tea and rice every day-there is a firecracker ringing in the rice.

Your family is terrible.

Liu: Great (thumbs up)

Cao: Oh, ok, ok, I see. Dad, he folded it and put it in an envelope. Okay, okay, let's go-

Don't go, just read the letter (excitedly)

Liu: This is the key.

Cao: No, no, no, I want to read my letter, not my wife's.

Ok, don't tell anyone. Open the letter. The second brother cried when he saw it-why did the second brother cry?

Liu: Hmm.

Cao: Look, there are two pigeons, a duck, two pigeons and a duck painted on it. This is your sister-in-law calling me: brother.

Brother, brother

Liu: Well, it's really hard to say.

Cao: (speechless) I told you not to cry. Keep reading. There is an elephant with a nose on this side of the letter.

There was a knife wrapped around it, and the tip of the knife stuck in a goose's neck, killing it.

Blood is a word in my mind.

Liu: What can I say?

Cao: Brother, brother, do you want to kill me like a goose?

Liu: You are such a thing.

Cao: I said, what does it mean to draw a lotus root with a broken silk and a small piece of charcoal?

-Your sister-in-law thinks that I want to grow up and sigh every day!

Liu: Great!

Cao: I said that there was a little man with a shaved head and a black coat, holding a hundred dollars in his hand.

There is a cigarette in this hand. What does that mean?

Liu: Hmm.

Cao: Hey, don't mention it. My son doesn't steal 100 yuan to buy cigarettes-me!

(Two people step down and bow)