I don't want to die in a boring life!

"I am most interested in myself.

I want to see where Wu will go and what else he can do.

I imagine myself as a male salmon, struggling in the river in early spring. "

musician Ryuichi Sakamoto said that Kitano Takeshi is one of the smartest people I have ever met. He can be a great president, as long as our society is willing to accept it.

Akira Kurosawa, a great god known as "Shakespeare in the film industry", wrote a special letter to him before he died, so that he could inherit his mantle, which may be the highest praise for him.

but at the same time, he is also a child from a slum.

He is the son of a painter, and in his words, he is "a class despised by society in Japan".

He was admitted to a famous university by his own efforts. In order not to reach for money at home, he dropped out of school and worked as a waiter in a bar. Later, he became a taxi driver, or simply worked as a day laborer.

Until an accidental opportunity, he changed from a wage earner to a crosstalk performer, then to a variety show host, who was not from a professional class. In the end, he mistakenly became a film director. Unexpectedly, he created a miracle of life and won the best director awards at Venice Film Festival and Cannes Film Festival many times, which was regarded as the "only hope" for Japanese films.

Ang Lee commented on Kitano Takeshi: "As long as he stands by, he can be made into a story."

For Kitano Takeshi, making up stories and making movies is his way to make peace with the world.

Because, in his heart, the world despises him.

"Basically, if I hadn't experienced such a bitter life, maybe I would have become someone else ... but life can't be repeated. We cannot escape from our childhood. I can't forget some very difficult moments in my youth, and I can't forget the condescending eyes of rich people when they look at us insignificant little people. "

Kitano Takeshi once described a period of his childhood in his autobiography:

"When I was a child, I went to a public primary school in Zuli District. This is a school for children of rich families, and it is still very famous today. Students will take mobile phones worth 3, yen to school. I remember there was a Fujisaki teacher at school who was my tutor for five years. He impressed me deeply.

He used to teach in a special school, and then he settled in Tokyo and became a teacher in our school. He taught me everything: music, the importance of sports, math, organ ... Occasionally, when I didn't do my homework well, he would hit me on the head.

At this time, I will imagine myself as another little boy in my class, watching Xiaowu get beaten. I no longer exist in my own body and suddenly become another person. Maybe this is my way to let myself not feel any pain.

This reason of looking at everything with a distant, cold and violent eye also made Kitano Takeshi become the movie master of the later cold and violent aesthetics.

It is better to burn calmly than to linger

In 1983, at the age of 36, Kitano Takeshi was the leading Japanese crosstalk performer and a TV star who was active on the TV screen. In everyone's eyes, he is a witty and humorous celebrity. However, Japanese national treasure director Nagisa??shima said that he saw "a man with a heart of stone" hidden in Kitano Takeshi's body.

So, he was invited to play a role in Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence, a staff sergeant with rude style and uncertain temperament, who would be depressed after drinking a little wine.

This serious film and rough characters, like a switch, have started the legendary film career of Kitano Takeshi, and also opened the other side that Kitano Takeshi himself was surprised by-cold, rough, gloomy and violent.

Next, I directed and performed my debut novel "The Violent Man", the Golden Lion Award-winning work "Huahuo" at Venice Film Festival, and the Best Director Award "Zuotou City" at Venice Film Festival ... one film after another was full of violence, and the silent and rude characters became Kitano Takeshi-style "violence aesthetics".

people who are silent are often as affectionate as the sea. Unfortunately, he can't express it.

After his father's death, when Kitano Takeshi was sorting out his relics, he found two or three pieces of paper on which his father practiced calligraphy, and his name-Kitano Kijiro was scrawled. Father couldn't write his name until he died, but he kept practicing secretly.

However, before his death, my father often yelled at Kitano Takeshi: "It's useless to write, but you don't have to write when you paint the wall!"

It was these sheets of paper that made Kitano Takeshi cry. Cry more sadly than when my father died.

Only then did Kitano Takeshi understand "what we missed". In order not to let miss continue to miss, Kitano Takeshi began to talk to his father from a distance with movies.

"I remember playing with him only once, and he took me to see the beach of Jiangzhi Island in the sea. That's the only memory I have. It's a moment when I was with him. It should be said that ... I enjoyed it happily and truly. " Therefore, the sea often appears in Kitano Takeshi's films.

In 1999, Kitano Takeshi wrote, directed and acted in the movie "Summer of Kijiro", and directly used his father's name, which was like a love letter to his father. Kikujiro, the leading actor, is idle and dull, just like his father.

This autobiographical film is regarded as the warmest and clearest film in Kitano Takeshi, and it was nominated as the best film in Palme d 'Or at Cannes Film Festival.

In this way, Kitano Takeshi left his father in a sad and warm lens.

This is an incompetent father, a complete loser, almost useless, unable to make money, unable to take care of his family, a coward when he doesn't drink, and a thug when he drinks.

Kitano Takeshi's understanding of his father is not simple, because a son's feelings for his father are more complicated than this, which is reconciliation and pity. In repeated reappearance, Kitano Takeshi released a son's unbearable to his father. "He even wants to create a world and hopes that his father can have another life."

Oedipus child

However, with my mother dead, I can't be Oedipus forever.

Kitano Takeshi described her mother as a smart, confident and strict woman who would never let herself be pushed around. Adhering to the concept of self-discipline and absolute respect for others, the mother tried every possible way to get her children out of poverty. I think I have Oedipus complex. When something happens, everyone still has the habit of relying on her to handle it. No matter when, I am still a child.

After Kitano Takeshi's career flourished, her mother openly asked Kitano Takeshi for 2, yen a month as pocket money, so Kitano Takeshi denounced her as a "vampire". He complained, angered and even disappointed his greedy mother and family.

But like the ending of Kitano Takeshi's movie, the ending came a little suddenly.

if she says that her son is right in a strange way, she will definitely be beaten by the world. "What a hopeless fool, please forgive him." When she said this, everyone would not be angry, but would only feel: "That guy is really helpless."

I lost. At the press conference on the night of the wake, I finally burst into tears

it's really rude that the variety show broadcasts that picture again and again. I have been thinking: how can I bring this matter with a joke? "Every time I thought that it was really hopeless this time, the wolf's mother-in-law who came back to life finally died."

Actually, I touched my mother's face and said, "It looks like the Egyptian Pharaoh Ramses II from the British Museum." All the friends who came home were amused.

However, when it came to the funeral, before telling jokes, he couldn't help but burst into tears ...

After several years, he said, "When do we think our parents were so difficult, we will be truly mature."

Talent is the only thing that can make me hold my head high in the face of this world.

For this world, Kitano Takeshi's heart is angry.

Many people don't understand why he hates Miyazaki Hayao.

In 214, at the Tokyo International Film Festival, Kitano Takeshi bombarded Miyazaki Hayao. "I hate animation and so on, and I hate Miyazaki Hayao very much, but his animation is very profitable."

Apart from the different political positions that everyone surmises, what Kitano Takeshi hates is not Miyazaki Hayao, but the beauty represented by Miyazaki Hayao.

Miyazaki Hayao is a standard rich second generation. When he was a child, his father gave him a model plane, not the sky. What he saw in his works was the beauty of the world. Kitano Takeshi, however, was poor when he was a child. He never saw these beautiful things. The only thing he can do is to make a beautiful reconciliation with this ugly world.

it is impossible for two people to understand the beautiful world.

Revenge on myself

When I was a child, I had a physical complex, a feeling of being inferior to others, because my figure was too thin, especially when I was exercising, and I felt that this body hindered me.

I hate my body and feel angry with myself.

in my head, there are two contradictory "I".

I feel some kind of unfairness, realize that equality does not exist, realize that some people are superior to others, and are more blessed ... When I grow up, I think less about my body.

I got back at myself: boxing. Revenge on your dwarf complex.

Today, I climbed into my Rolls Royce in shorts and slippers. No matter what my living standard is, I hope people will see me as I am, and then simply think that I am like a person who is usually indifferent to my appearance. But I know exactly what people think of me, and I know what they think of my strange body shape.

In a word, if you want to enjoy life, you should not expect too much from others, God, the country and the government. People must make great efforts to ensure that they get the slightest happiness. This is really not easy, because this road is full of traps. And I learned from experience that happiness also comes from giving: giving to the poor, to society and to work. Personally, I think that's what makes me happy.

as far as I'm concerned, this is a way to fight against inequality.

He said that people can't succeed normally in life after experiencing a lot of failures or painful tests. What a realistic and painful statement.

But what is really valuable for Kitano Takeshi is that he has not given up this success. For him, the key to a beautiful reconciliation lies in his constant struggle and efforts.

"Perhaps the haze of childhood is painful and haunting, but it can't be a reason why one can't succeed. It's just that this success is more tortuous than normal people. "

Some materials are selected from Kitano Takeshi's Self-Report.