A collection of jokes

A collection of short jokes

A collection of short jokes: The English professor once had a meal in a Western restaurant. After finishing the meal, he said in very standard English: ?Waiter, bill please !(Waiter, pay the bill!)?As a result, the waiter ran to the kitchen and shouted to a chef:?Hey! Bill, someone is looking for you outside!?More wonderful jokes are in the joke column, welcome to enjoy!

A collection of short jokes (1)

1. On a blind date, the woman asked me if I had ever been in love before?

Let me go, I must have been in love. I am narcissistic. The main one, supplemented by secret love.

2. Women have two major hobbies: 1. Talking about money with poor people; 2. Talking about relationships with rich people.

3. A woman must not be more willful than she is beautiful; a man must not be more willful than he is rich.

4. Dong Mingzhu’s story tells male compatriots: If a woman really wants to buy something, no one can stop her. If you really want it and you don't buy it, then of course Lao Wang (Jianlin) next door will buy it for you.

5. The most difficult thing in the world is women. If you flatter her, she will become proud. If you beat or scold her, she will cry. If you kill her, her ghost will be worshiped. ?The best way is to love her.

6. Those boys who tell you to wear more clothes when the weather is cold are probably looking for opportunities to take off your clothes.

7. Friendly reminder: After you miss the woman who loves to look through her cell phone, you will only meet women who love to look through their wallets. Collection of jokes (2)

1. What can women do together? It can be right or wrong, very hilarious.

2. Some girls, when you go out you don’t put on makeup, you put on disguise.

3. I always advise others to find a partner who is decent-looking and treats you well, but I only want to find someone good-looking.

4. When a woman says she wants to be treated like a princess, she is actually subtly expressing to you that she needs a servant.

5. Do you feel that your girlfriend or wife has been particularly resentful and complaining recently, forcing you to wash the dishes, sweep the floor and wipe the table too many times? Haha,? Anxiety syndrome when buying seasonal clothes? That’s all.

6. If a girl goes out with very elaborate makeup, she is probably not going to meet boys, but to meet girls because she wants to take selfies.

7. Men marry women in the hope that they will never change. Women marry men in the hope that they will change. They were all disappointed.

8. If you live a marriage with love, there is no way it will fail. We should eat marriage as food and love as snacks.

9. Marriage: The most advanced form of war in the modern world, it is the only war in which participants sleep with the enemy. Collection of jokes (3)

1. In the days to come, your partner will definitely love you unfailingly, and then love yourself 90% of the time.

2. Who is heavier, 50 kilograms of iron or 50 kilograms of women? The answer is women, because women will lie about their weight.

3. If someone praises you for your generosity, be sure to check whether they are talking about your face.

4. Our standard for an ordinary person is: in addition to making money to support yourself, you also need to improve yourself, learn a second specialty and a second foreign language, and preferably have some talent. Play a musical instrument, or understand life, have a basic financial foundation, own a car and a house, and go abroad to see the world.

Then our standard for rich people is: as long as he does not learn bad things. . .

5. Uselessness is the most affectionate, and disdain is the most lovesickness.

6. Did the girl understand what the boy said?

1. I heard that you have a boyfriend? (I just asked if I can do anything)

2 .Oh, how can you not be pursued by someone who is so good-looking? (Wormwood has a lot to offer!)

3. That’s because your demands are too high! (Do you think I can do that?)

4. I really don’t know what you are looking for! (MD, you actually look down on me) ;