I don't remember a joke satirizing the Japanese.

After Pan Jinlian fell in love with Ximen Qing, Wu Dalang was angry, but there was nothing he could do. Go ahead, but you can't beat Ximen Qing. Go ahead, Pan Jinlian won't listen. Men can be killed, but not humiliated. In a rage, Wu Dalang decided to throw himself into the river. He floated in the water and was washed to an island by the sea. The local fishermen fished him out and found that there was still breath, so they gave artificial respiration and saved the dying Wu Dalang.

The fishermen were overjoyed and told each other that there was a tall, handsome and powerful man on the island. We have been so short for generations. We should use this gentleman's height and momentum to improve our popularity and make him our king. So Wu Dalang became king. Seventy-two concubines in three palaces and six hospitals, Wu Dalang soon had a large group of governors. These princes scattered among the people and married women of ordinary people, so since then, the height of local residents has improved significantly. As a king, Wu Dalang was very diligent at first. Every day is "play early if you have something to do, and leave early if you have nothing to do." After a few days, he felt bored. Officials have to talk about trivial things for a long time. So he said, in the future, you should write down the important content of the matter as a souvenir and show it to me. Officials are curious. What do you mean by "write"? We can't read or write. Wu Dalang said, well, I'll give you a cram school to eliminate illiteracy. So he used his limited knowledge to give literacy classes to officials and learn to write. But Wu Dalang sells baked wheat cakes. He only knows a few words, and many words only remember some radicals. When officials study communication abroad, they forget some parts of some words, which leads to the current "fake" words: hiragana, katakana and so on. This is an important part of oriental culture. Although writing was invented, there was no paper, so the Japanese stole paper from the Chinese. Paper was finally made, but because of their poor technology at that time, paper was not made very well. They showed their paper to King Wu Dalang. Wu Dalang saw that the paper was poor, which was only equivalent to the toilet paper he used in China. He said angrily, "Isn't this toilet paper?" Since the king said so, no one dared to change it, so the Japanese called this paper toilet paper. After this reform, Wu Dalang gained more support. One day, he found that his subjects had no names. So he said, no, everyone has to have a name. Of course, you can't call Qian Sun Zhao Li. You can take your surname, no matter where you live. So there are surnames such as Tanaka, Panasonic and Yamazaki. As for the name, just "one, two, three, four". But the boss can't be called "Dalang", which violates my taboo. He can only be called "Taro" and the second one can't be called "Jiro", which violates my brother's taboo and can only be called "Jiro". I don't mind if you ask others to come in order. So this country has the names of "Taro Yamagata" and "Jiro Tanaka". After Wu Dalang became king, he was always tired of eating delicacies. He remembered that when he was drifting at sea, he had nothing to eat, so he had to catch fish and eat it raw. Looking back now, it tastes pretty good. So when he asks his chef to cook fish, he must only cook it raw, not cooked. After its popularity, this dish has won warm support from the people of the whole country and has since become a famous dish in this country. Wu Dalang also found that locals, like China people, slept in their own beds. He was very angry and thought that since Pan Jinlian and Ximen Qing had an affair, Ximen Qing often came to his house, leaving him no place to sleep, so he had to sleep on the ground. I can only sleep on the ground when I am king, and you can only sleep on the ground! Only in this way can we not forget to take away the shame of our wife! So he issued a decree according to this meaning. From then on, people in this country can only sleep on the floor covered with mats, which is called "tatami". Wu Dalang thought, in China, when the king is called style, crowding round, colorful flags flying all over the sky. In this country, we don't even have a sign, so it's boring. So he took out his apron when he was selling sesame cakes and asked the eunuch to wash it. It was still white and used as a flag. There must be a sign on the national flag. All the impressions in Wu Dalang's mind are only the baked wheat cakes that have been sold. So he branded a red and round sesame seed cake and stuck it in the middle of the apron. This became the national flag of that island country. Wu Dalang was king for several years, but he died. When he died, he was still upset that he couldn't beat Ximen Qing and avenge his wife, so he left his last words for future generations to avenge Ximen Qing. Later, his descendants practiced day and night and went to Shaolin Temple to steal a few tricks. In memory of Dalang, King Wu, it was named Bushido (later, because the people who learned Kung Fu had a low level of education and the country's writing was "fake", it was spread into Bushido, and because Wu Dalang gained the world from scratch, these moves were also called karate. ) In the early Ming Dynasty, Wu's descendants began to send people to avenge Ximen Qing, but they were sunk by our hero Qi Jiguang. This is the "War of Resistance against Japanese Aggression" in history. In the 20th century, the people of Wu crushed most of my rivers and mountains from north to south and from east to west, but they still failed to find their enemy, Ximen Qing. So they actually want China people to learn their "fake" characters, China people to take their names, and China people to realize the "glory of Greater Asia" under the banner of "baking sesame seeds in aprons". This really makes China people who can't win on the battlefield laugh their teeth off. Recently, Wu Dalang's descendants heard that there was reliable news that Ximen Qing was living in seclusion in Fujian, so it seems that someone sells baked wheat cakes on the Diaoyu Islands opposite Fujian all day. Supplement; After Wu Dalang's death, there was a civil war in Japan. Men go out to fight and women follow. In order to facilitate sex, women cover themselves with sheets and tie quilts on their backs. This is the Japanese kimono. Whenever a man needs it, he takes it off and puts it on the ground and starts to do it. Many children were born in the March, so they were all named after the places where they had sex at that time-Inoue, Matsushita, Tanaka ... Later, during World War II, our soldiers kept the habit of bringing women into the army, but changed them to "comfort women". Later, after the defeat of Japan in World War II, the Japanese army was not allowed to have "comfort women", so it was renamed "Masturbation Army". Because he likes masturbation, he is called "Japanese".