Jokes of New Year's Day class meeting

1. Landlord: What should I do if I get poisoned on the Internet during this time? Violent reply: As long as you uninstall antivirus software, you won't see poisoning. Really, I tried this method. That's brilliant. I don't talk to him about ordinary people. 2. Landlord: I feel distressed. The boss borrowed 500 yuan and didn't remember to pay it back. What should I do? Violent reply: Only when you two are present, you keep saying "250 ..." After a long time, he will remember. Good luck to LZ. 3. Landlord: Someone replied that two black dots were used, and I don't know why. Violent reply: The expert used two points when replying to the post. I thought there was dust on the screen, which I couldn't wipe off by hand, and I even spat on it. 4. Landlord: Why do some people like to lick their fingers when turning pages or counting money? This feels dirty! Violent reply: Lions like to pee everywhere and declare their occupation of territory. 5. Landlord: I am a psychiatrist in the Second Hospital. If you don't know anything about mental illness, you can ask me … how did you escape? 6. Landlord: What does the letter ATM above the self-service bank mean? Violent reply: it is the initials of the full name of the image spokesperson Altman. 7. Landlord: Why does my head hurt every time I play basketball? Violent reply: Landlord, your name is basketball! 8. Landlord: I found a mouse pad on the bus and went back to get the computer. What do you think I lack? Bao Qiang replied 1: I picked up a grain of sand on the bus and went back to build a house. What do you think I lack? Violence reply 2: I can't do it without computers and furniture! I must buy a set of furniture. With furniture, there is no place to put it! I have to buy a house. Living alone in a house is boring and needs a girlfriend. You have to get married if you have a girlfriend! You have to have children after marriage. You have to buy milk powder when you have a baby! Raise your children. Your child may pick up a mouse pad when he grows up, and there will be more things missing ... 9. Landlord: Why didn't Sima Guang throw stones into the jar to make the water surface rise so that he could drink water? Violent reply: when you see the landlord, you have a sense of superiority in IQ. LZ means Sima Guang smashed the jar because he wanted to drink the water inside? Afraid that the people inside will not die, fill another stone? That's great.