Simple joke

New joke, 0, female: Do you like my angel face or devil figure? M: I ... I like your sense of humor. 0. 1, in junior high school, there was a classmate in the class who was very awesome. He was either late or fell asleep as soon as the class started, and didn't wake up until the class was over. One day, he was ten minutes late. When the math teacher saw him, he said, you can't be late again, or you will get insufficient sleep! 1, there were two mm chatting on the bus yesterday. A: "How are little C and her boyfriend now?" B: "You're welcome. Goodbye. . Her boyfriend cried to me the other day. " A sorry. B went on to say, "Her boyfriend was very sad that day, but he didn't cry." A praised "good backbone ~ ~" B choked and whispered "Uh. . He said he couldn't cry, and his mascara was not waterproof. . "2. I haven't met two mental patients and escaped from the hospital. They ran to an orchard and climbed a tree respectively. One of them jumped down from the tree and rolled on the ground like a fallen fruit. As he rolled, he looked up and said to the man above, hey, why don't you come down? The man above replied: no-ok-I'm not familiar with it yet! 3. A pair of lovers snuggled up to each other. The man said, "Dear, I want to dedicate all my pure love to you!" " "The woman was shocked and said," Which one are you going to give to those impure ones? "4. Farmer A:" I had enough of drought last year. This year I thought of a way to ensure that I am not afraid of drought. " Farmer B: "It's amazing. Can you tell me what this is? "Farmer A:" I plant a row of onions next to each row of wheat. As soon as the onion grows, the wheat cries all day, and I seem to have to drain water often. On that foggy day, Xiao Li couldn't see the road clearly, but he had something urgent to do. At this time, he saw that the car in front had a light and followed, but after walking for a while, the car in front didn't go. He waited for a while and got a little impatient. As soon as he got off the bus, he shouted, "Why doesn't the car in front go?" The man in front said, "I'm home." Xiao Li saw that the car had arrived at the garage. 6. A patient went to see a doctor for the first time. "Before you came here, did you consult anyone about your illness? "The doctor asked." Just ask the owner of the drugstore around the corner, "the patient replied." Doctors hate that people who are not doctors often give medical advice, and he doesn't hide it. "What bad idea did that fool give you? ""He asked me to come to you. "7, face and ass year-end evaluation, the result is that ass looks better than face. Reason: 1, smooth and not wrinkled; 2, delicate, no acne, chickenpox rust and so on. ; 3, frugality, no need to spend money on maintenance; 4. Beautiful and concise [url=javascript:void(0)] fashionable [/URL]; 5. Solemn, atmospheric and blessed; 6, sincere, can't laugh or laugh, two sides and three knives; 7. Modesty and concealment; 8, dialectical, both divided into two and combined into one; 9, noble, bear the burden of humiliation, often beaten on behalf of others; 10, practical, can sit and stand, or a window unit for internal and external communication. 8. In junior high school, there was a male classmate in the class, who was handsome, well-proportioned and charming. Naturally, the girls are salivating and ready to act. Naturally, this male classmate soon found a partner. The female S appeared, and she saw the boys and their partners having a good time every day. We have to describe the close relationship between them as inseparable. Of course, the female S is jealous and extremely unhappy! The handsome guy I like kissed me with another woman, which made me very uncomfortable. This jealousy accumulated over time, and finally the woman S decided to give the man some color to see see! For the first time, the second time and the third time, the male students finally found out that something was wrong. Why did the valve core of his bicycle disappear three times in just one week? ? But I can't find the suspect in my heart. Who did this? Finally, in an ambush, the murderer who committed the crime on the spot, female S, was caught in bed! Female s blushed in front of everyone, and she couldn't say a word for a long time, but can the students watching the scene let her go? Haha, so everyone gave the female S a friendly and shameful nickname: Mrs. Thatcher (angry lady), and the female colleague was furious! 12, a salesman endlessly introduced all his products to a housewife, and then asked, "What is the most needed in your family?" The housewife replied without hesitation, "money. "13, when I went out shopping, I found a shop full of all kinds of clothes. On the glass in front of the door are posted: big rewards for opening a shop, 30 yuan/suit of high-grade suits, 5 yuan/shirt ... I am inexplicably happy: I finally caught up with such a good thing! So I rushed in, and I looked up at the moment I entered the door: dry cleaner!